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what-to-say-next syndrome
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Author:  phizz [ Mon Jun 01, 2009 8:31 pm ]
Post subject:  what-to-say-next syndrome
Hi guys,

Have been studying up on this stuff for a little while now, and have been putting it into practice a little bit recently, however I have unfortunately not been having so much luck as of yet, one of my downfalls is that I’m constantly trying to think of what to say next, and all that springs to mind is the typical AFC questions, where are you from, what do you do etc. Although I mainly manage to prevent myself from saying anything like that, when I try to think of something more intriguing or unconventional to say I draw a blank and become increasingly flustered, which leads to me rambling almost nonsensically.

So what I was curious about finding out was, if you guys have any tips about avoiding this what-to-say-next syndrome, any ideas which might help me to be more in the moment, I know that approaching when your stuck in your own head too much is a bad idea, yet I seem unable to help it, and every effort to avoid doing so seems to make me even more distracted.

Respect.
P
Author:  Don_k [ Mon Jun 01, 2009 11:33 pm ]
Post subject: 
Keep practising and have some canned stuff for use. So whenever feel this way , u can use that. Telling stories and future projections are also gd things...

Also try putting her on the spot light. Ask her questions like > Whats ur ideal holiday and why is that . Question that require may be her to think more. So that u wil have less pressure on ur self..

Depending on the surrounding energy levels u can alter ur conversation styles...

So in a club.. U can get away with bullshit talk more than daytime..
Author:  mike. [ Mon Jun 01, 2009 11:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
I myself have been there man


one thing is you need to start being in the moment of the conversation
LISTEN to her she WILL give you things to talk about
i promise
so many guys don't




listen to the girls
and they get caught up in there head trying to think of what to say next
"how can i sweep her off her feet"
if you do this your missing SO much

the best tip i can offer if you wanna get more
to talk about so you can stay out of your head a little
is take the first question you asked
let her answer then
LISTEN to the answer
when you hear something
dive into it more

example: so what do you like to do for fun?

hb: oh dance, hangout with friends, movies

(typical response from a guy to this would be" oh cool...so what do you do for work?)

but instead of being typical dive in
she said she likes dance
build on that

Guy: Oh you dance..how long have you been a dancer?

girl: since i was little, my sister and mom were dancers and i kinda just fell in love with it too its awesome being on the dance floor i feel so free

guy: that's way awesome i know exactly what you mean
I'm really into music and sometimes i like to do little open mics
even though its not a huge venue i still feel so free,like im on top of the world
its like a zen thing
the whole world just stops and its just me, the guitar, and the audience
i feel so connected with the audience..blah..blah..blah

hb: is so into talking about maybe what dancing makes her feel on a deep level
goes into how awesome she thinks it is you play guitar
now thinks its awesome that you relate t her on that emotional level
blah blah blah.....


so the point is instead of moving on from question to question
you ask a question
and if you hear something that could go deeper
take it deeper and learn about this girl


hope this helped a little

-Hatch
Author:  Don_k [ Tue Jun 02, 2009 12:20 am ]
Post subject: 
Hatch = Hitch :P
Author:  mike. [ Tue Jun 02, 2009 2:43 am ]
Post subject: 
best believe ;)
Author:  phizz [ Wed Jun 03, 2009 1:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks dudes tried it out last night with a greater degree of success, appreciate it :D
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