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What do you say when a girl asks you, Are you seeing....
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Author:  allnatural! [ Sat Apr 04, 2009 8:31 pm ]
Post subject:  What do you say when a girl asks you, Are you seeing....
What do you say when a girl asks you, are you seeing or sleeping with anyone else? Mind you, this is a new relationship and a hypothetical. I'm analyzing a recent breakup. After knowing her for a couple of weeks, we hit it off but she asked the question so I told the truth. "Yes I am seeing a few different girls right now." I wasn't looking for anything serious at that time but was looking forward to getting more serious and willing to break it off with all the other girls. Once I told her that the relationship went to shit and she hit on some guys right in front of me on a date, exchanged numbers and told me to catch a cab! UGHHH! I asked her about it later and she said she thought I could handle it. I'm usually good picking up girls but I can't figure out what to do next time. Any takers?

If I just want a sexual relationship, how do I respond to the question?

If I want something more serious, how do I respond to the question?

How can you decide so quickly what type of relationship you want with a girl you just met?
Author:  Luca_J [ Sat Apr 04, 2009 9:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hahaha. Really? Ohhh dear.. she told you to catch a cab and go home? Goddd you could have a good one here ;) wow.. that was a shit test.. you should've ignored it and told her you wanted to stay a bit longer and pick up a few other women.. you told her your seeing different women so she decided to test you to see if what you was sayin is genuine.

You answered the question ok I guess.. I mean you could've told her your dating a few girls SPAM but your looking for that one right girl if you wanted an exclusive relationship

you wanted a fuck buddy you could've just said "I like to keep my options open" and then changed the subject.

Your state needs to be clear in order for your body to convey the correct signals, i.e. you want a fuck buddy? treat her like a fuck buddy and have it in the back of your mind she IS your fuck buddy.

As for the last bit of your question... only you can decide.. in order to help you, you should sit down and decide 5 must have qualites for a exclusive relationship, and 5 qualites for a FB that way when a girl meets either qualites you can decide from there
Author:  allnatural! [ Mon Apr 06, 2009 3:07 am ]
Post subject: 
Hey, thanks for the info! and your right! That night she shit tested me I should have started hitting on other girls but I chicken out. It won't happen again! I turned into an AFC. The jealousy plot line works but you gotta use it with caution when the girl is a potential exclusive relationship.

On the whole inner state comment, that helps out alot. I agree with that too. I know the difference between FB and exclusive relationship and I usually keep that in focus but I fucked up in two places. We both got way to serious with each other way to fast and I put her on a pedestal because I couldn't believe she was genuinely interested in me. We both agreed that we had alot more in common than usual and it scared the shit out of me that I may have actually met the one. So, all that said, some more fucked up shit happened and I ended it. Better luck next time.

Thanks for the input!
Author:  Luca_J [ Mon Apr 06, 2009 10:21 am ]
Post subject: 
No worries, its what we're all here for.. at the end of the day we're all learning and we're learning from our mistakes.. and it helps for people to post whats happened to them on here so some of us can give our opinions and break downs and you can realise what you did wrong and prevent it next time :)

Totti 8)
Author:  Ezo [ Mon Apr 06, 2009 11:40 am ]
Post subject: 
Am I seeing someone at the moment? Yes, really nice girl from (insert city here). We get along just fine you know.

After this, treat it like it never happened. She wont mind if shes really attracted and if she does then who cares.
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