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| The right attitude when a girl flakes? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=40674 |
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| Author: | Mind Hacker [ Mon Mar 02, 2009 6:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | The right attitude when a girl flakes? |
Please vote and tell your opinion.
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| Author: | Pool Shark [ Mon Mar 02, 2009 6:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
If it's a girl I just met and she flakes on the first date. I just drop her. She didn't go for a reason and I don't really have time to care about some one I just met. If it's someone I'm going after then I just ignore it and move on. To me it really doesn't matter why they flaked. If they canceled with me on a Friday next time I see them I'd be like "Dude on Friday I had the craziest time (funny story about Friday)" That way I'm letting her know that what she does, doesn't phase me and she not the only thing going in my life. If they do it a second time, I'll just ignore them. If they really want to stay then they'll try to keep talking to me if they don't then whatever |
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| Author: | Cinnamon Spice [ Mon Mar 02, 2009 6:48 pm ] |
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I'm going to respectfully disagree here. I've found the best method here is to punish her, but not by being a jerk, by flat-out telling her it's not cool. Just a simple "Where were you?" "That's not cool. I was expecting you and you weren't there. When I make time for someone, I expect them to be there. I have many other people who I could have made plans with, but I chose to make them with you. If you can't make time for me, I'm not going to make time for you anymore." Something like that, to let her know that you will not take it anymore. And then DON'T TAKE IT. If she flakes after that, drop her. Cinnamon |
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| Author: | Call Me Dre [ Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I'm going to respectfully disagree here.
the reason you should not do this is because maybe she is testing you, and by saying "where were you" is actually DLV in a sense that you actually care that she flaked...I've found the best method here is to punish her, but not by being a jerk, by flat-out telling her it's not cool. Just a simple "Where were you?" "That's not cool. I was expecting you Cinnamon what usually do is just ignore them until they txt/call, and if they don't there is a reason behind it, lol but then i think to myself who the fuck cares its one girl, move on |
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| Author: | avk [ Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I honestly see the best method is to say what you actually feel and be honest about it. In the end you come first and not her or anyone else in this matter. if you feel that she deserve punishment tell her . if you DID have a good time with your friends then tell her what she actually missed out. Remember in the end you have to live the life that you really say you do and not make up some story. If you do you will never find pickin up women as a second thought but more of pressure on who you actually are and more of a task force which is not FUN |
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| Author: | 870 [ Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I've found the best method here is to punish her, but not by being a jerk, by flat-out telling her it's not cool.
This was my stand-by strategy for YEARS, and for years it was the weakest point in my game. Why? Because it's easier for the chick to just avoid your condescending attitude than it is to accept that flaking was a shitty thing to do and start being punctual.Just a simple "Where were you?" "That's not cool. I was expecting you and you weren't there. When I make time for someone, I expect them to be there. I have many other people who I could have made plans with, but I chose to make them with you. If you can't make time for me, I'm not going to make time for you anymore." Something like that, to let her know that you will not take it anymore. And then DON'T TAKE IT. If she flakes after that, drop her. It took me forever to learn this lesson, but there are two scenarios and two responses that I've found are the most effective. 1) When she calls to flake - This is the easiest one. Just reframe her flaking as a good thing, ala "Oh, you can't come? That's perfect, my friend was wanting me to come over and watch episodes of The OC. Apparently I remind her of some character on there." Note the subtle suggestion that I will be hanging out with another girl. Credit Herbal for this brilliant response. 2) When she just doesn't show up - Don't make initial contact. 99% of the time she will call you after a couple days. When she does, pretend it never happened. If she brings it up, tell her you totally forgot and make new plans. This is what has worked best for me, although I don't get many flakes anymore because I nip them in the bud by running this routine on the first interaction: At some point in the night, I mention having really high standards for the people I allow into my life, and when she asks what I mean I say, "Well for example, if a girl flakes on me, I probably won't ever take her seriously." Cuts flakes in half  Your boy, 870 |
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| Author: | The Ultimate [ Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | yeah |
i agree with the above 100%. every time i've attempted to call a flake, no matter how respectfully, she'll use it as an excuse to say ur over-reacting or just ignore ur dlv. i think they flake and just wait for u to be bothered. even saying ur not bothered indicates ur bothered. ignoring it or makin out u did something instead (in a non obvious way) is all u can do. if u act not bothered u actually will be less bothered and it wont stress u nearly enuff. some ppl r just born flakes and in the end they'll miss out by being known as unreliable |
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| Author: | Chad99 [ Tue Mar 10, 2009 2:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thats great 870 and The Ultimate. How true is that though, if you don't let it bother you then it won't. The choice is yours. So can I ask how would you approach this situation? Meet a girl out, fri night, talk for a long time at the club. 1-2hrs, not too much kino cause to many of her friends were around. Walked her out, kiss on the check good bye. Look at each other again, then kiss on the lips goodbye. Prior to that, talked about going to dinner on Thursday night. Msg her on Sunday just say hey hope you had a good weekend, call you tomoro night (she was at work).... more so, so she would have my number. No reply, tried calling the next night (bit late 9pm) but not that late. No answer no response today...? Still waiting to see if she is a flaker or what the story is with her? She seemed really great and we had a lot in common, and I things would have escalated had there been a chance. My mate was telling me chicks do that all the time, talk to guys and give out their number (or at least a number... lol) just to validate themselves. What's the next move? |
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| Author: | Mind Hacker [ Fri Mar 13, 2009 9:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for this thread guys. I think 870 made some good points there. |
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