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| !The Impossible Quest(Ex-gf got married/Destroy the fiance)! https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=39949 |
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| Author: | Nevermind2004x [ Sat Feb 21, 2009 3:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | !The Impossible Quest(Ex-gf got married/Destroy the fiance)! |
The Impossible Quest ( Ex-girlfriend got married/ Destroy the fiance ) Ok guys you're in for a good read. It's gonna be a long-one. And I need your help on it. This is the ultimate challenge! I don't think I'll ever end up in a more challenging situation than this! To simplify things down a bit; just a quick info about me and the girl that this is about: We both study in the same university in the UK but we're not english and are not from the same country either. We met from a mutual friend and after 5 days or less of talking we ended up falling insanely in love with eachother. We're both 20 Ok here we go: So...Last October I start dating this girl. Everything's awesome and perfect. In the middle of December as the semester ends we both go back to our home countries for the winter vacations. So we go into a Long-Distance Relationship Status (if you wanna call it that) until we meet back in the UK in February. Contact level is really low - limited to once a week on SPAM due to both not being capable to spend time on our PCs. Everything is ok until after not hearing each other for 2 weeks she comes on SPAM and tells me she's fallen in love with someone else. I act like it's nothing big and accept the let's be friends status while maintaining a PUA approach. (Not showing it affects at all.) I was 100% sure that I could handle whatever boyfriend that had gotten into her head during the vacation. Given the fact that he wouldn't be in the UK around makes things even easier. So we were supposed to both be in the UK for the start of the second semester on 1st of February. She was here on that date but I wasn't due to weather conditions affecting flights and stuff and me getting sick. So far not much communication has happened (just a bit) since the actual break-up on SPAM. So we text each other a few messages and it turns out she is going back to her country for 1 more week after the first week of the semester. So what actually happens is - I come on the second week and she goes back. So 3 days ago she finnaly came back and we were finnaly in the same country (UK) at the same time and at the same place. I had left a St. Valentine's Gift for her at her place. So she texted me the same night saying she loved it etc. So today we finnaly met up and I had planned to take her on a trip to London and have fun together as friends (obviously I would start to build things up again) AND HERE'S WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING It turns out she got married to the guy she fell in love with back in her country. She showed me the ring and stuff. Church Ceremony. It's damn real. Good thing is my brain seemed to receive the news as funny so I completely kept my "player" game on. I tried bits of some BF-Destroying. I haven't fucked up in any way. Now the thing is - How do I approach this - for me at least this is a HIGHLY UNIQUE SITUATION. A girl that I'd give my life for breaks me up on SPAM. I go through 1 month of planning and reviewing stuff on how to approach this when we get back here. And it turns out I'm not DEALING WITH A BOYFRIEND BUT WITH A FRIGGIN' FIANCE!!! Now I know it's possible to deal with this. It's tough - near impossible - but I believe it can be done and I'm up for the challenge. A bloody ring and a marriage that has existed for only 10 days or less doesn't change a damn thing in my opinion. Furthermore she's not even 20 yet - she's 19 and the guy she married is 21. If I need to add something just give me a shout out guys. Please I'm not desperate. I know the rules all too well enough - I can sleep with 10 more gals if i wish to but I'm madly in love with this one and I NEED to do this. I just need to make her get back together with me - leading to a possible divorce or something with this guy. So please any suggestions - approaches - ideas - personal experiences - comments - thoughts - anything. I turn to you, all the PUAs around the world out there with this plea. I know it can be done I just need some guidance and the right tools to do this. Thanks to EVERYONE no matter if there was a reply or not. (bows) |
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| Author: | base_player [ Sun Feb 22, 2009 2:37 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
wow, that's a bummer indeed. Does she love her fiance? Why would she agree to marriage to a guy she isn't going to be with anyway (LDR)? Is she from a country where parents marry their children or smth? Thats a weird situation, but yeah i agree that you have a chance, given she does have feelings for you and that the engagement was rushed in some way. |
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| Author: | nightrider767 [ Sun Feb 22, 2009 6:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Nevermind, I'd suggest you re-examine some of those PUA concepts. One of them is the idea of "One-Itis". Getting so into a girl that you think she's the only one in the world for you. It's a horrible mindset to get into. It shows needyness that kills attraction. But in your case, the worst affect of this is, it limits our options. We always have to keep the option of walking open. If a girl turns out to be crazy, if she's a liar, if she's controlling, we've always got to leave that back door open so that we can walk. Once you lose that power, you've lost everything. That's the whole point of PUA skills, knowing that we can move on from "projects" that are just too much work and not worth it. So I can't say for sure that you have a problem with that. But I would suggest you think about it. Do a search on this forum to learn more about it. It's a huge thing. It's how guys allow themseles to enter the total melt-down mode. Step aside from the emotion of this moment. What are the facts. You haven't known this lady all that long. She's actually from another country, as situation that is always smart to avoid. She is married, a karma destroying getting in the way of that. Oh yeah,,, and there are a million other hot body chicks in the world and you are a young guy with some good skill. Hmm... That's just my take. Anyways, take care bro in whatever you deem best! |
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| Author: | Locke [ Wed Feb 25, 2009 6:33 am ] |
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Nightrider, well put. You're obsessing over a woman that dumped you. Ask yourself why? You love her? She has moved on. It's one sided, and that means your are chasing. Not only are you chasing but you are determined to "win" something. Your actions will reflect this....and you will probably make things worse. Also, why would you want to break up a marriage? Convince a girl to cheat on her husband? That isn't a good mindset, and if she does ever close with you, that will create unimaginable drama in her life--leading to the upset of many people. Do you want to be the cause of that? Just think about those few things, then decide if your time is better vested in looking for another human being to love (because there certainly are many!) |
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| Author: | Superunknown [ Thu Feb 26, 2009 2:05 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Am I the only one who is kind of distubed by the fact that she meets and falls in love with a guy in less than two months, breaks up with him, does it again in two months, and decides to marry the guy, all while going out on a "date" with the guy she just broke up with, and this sentence had way too many commas? She sounds like the biggest flake on the face of the Universe. I don't see how their marriage would possibly last when the girl is so undeniably fickle, and that includes a relationship with you. She needs to sort her shit out, and thats all there is to it. Real "love" is a powerful emotion, and if you do fall in love with someone in two months, you don't fall back out of it in a matter of days, and then back into it on a marriage level in another two months with a different guy. |
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