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I don't want in the friend zone anymore
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Author:  Randomness [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 7:15 am ]
Post subject:  I don't want in the friend zone anymore
Alright guys, here's my story

There is a girl that has recently started working where i work (I've known her about 3 weeks now)....shortly after she started, we became friends, I got her number....(In my mind doing a happy dance) and we are still great friends to this day

At work, we have a blast together, we are both loud and obnoxious and i actually enjoy work when she is there. I have alot of female friends, but that's the problem, they are all friends. I have a very very bad habit of falling in the dreaded friend zone with girls, and it's starting to irritate me. There is something about this new girl that I am really liking, she's smart, cute, humorous...everything i look for in a girlfriend. She asked if i was interested in a movie this weekend, and i said yes of course, but then i find out it's with some other friends from work as well.

This girl has given me several IOI's
-Sitting on my lap at work with her arm around me
-Constantly throwing compliments at me like "Aww your so cute"

I am too nervous to act on theses IOI's I think...I really want to make a move on this girl, but the absolute LAST thing i want to do in the world is scare her off....how can i break it gently to her that i am falling for her without scaring her off? I really hope you guys can help me :)


-Random
Author:  LEPRECHAUN [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 7:28 am ]
Post subject: 
She asked if you wanted to go see a movie with other friend from work...

Sounds to me like she wants to get you in the dark so no one can see what
is going on...

Take her up on this offer and see what happens.

If she does kino you, kino back... if she kisses you, kiss her back...

Come back and let us know what happened if you need more advice.
Author:  Hopeless Romantic [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 7:30 am ]
Post subject: 
Just relax man, play it cool. You don't want to tell her how you feel until you've gotten her invested in wanting a relationship with you.

When you're with her, be playful. Poke fun at her. Make friends with her friends. Just be a fun guy to be around.

You have to act on how you feel. If you don't act she will think you don't like her and move on and then you get placed in LJBF.

Next time, don't be so ready to jump at the chance when she asks you to hang out. Be a little elusive. Let her wonder where you are and what you're doing. Mystery is always good.

Remember though, if this one doesn't work out, there's still plenty of other girls out there for you who can do the same thing for you. So don't get too caught up with her. Good luck, and let us know how it goes.
Author:  Randomness [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 7:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the quick responces guys. Hopeless Romantic....I really agree with you in saying

"When you're with her, be playful. Poke fun at her. Make friends with her friends. Just be a fun guy to be around. "

Thats how it is every day at work with us, we have so much fun together, it's just that i have an issue with taking it beyond the friend zone, i'm just now realizing that i think i have a huge fear of rejection, i honestly think that's whats holding me back, I hate rejection, but worse, i would hate to make things awkward between us.

But on the bright side, she just called me, and she wants to go later this week with me and buy matching hats :P ....Another IOI?
Author:  LEPRECHAUN [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 7:42 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
But on the bright side, she just called me, and she wants to go later this week with me and buy matching hats :P ....Another IOI?
How cute the FRIENDSHIP ZONE must look for you... Friends do this kind of
stuff man... don't buy into it... get a hat that is totally opposite of hers.
Author:  Randomness [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 7:52 am ]
Post subject: 
The whole thing started out that she always wore my hat at work cause she loved it so much haha, now apparently she says i have good taste in hats so she wants to go buy matching ones....should i back off and not go?
Author:  LEPRECHAUN [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 8:07 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
The whole thing started out that she always wore my hat at work cause she loved it so much haha, now apparently she says i have good taste in hats so she wants to go buy matching ones....should i back off and not go?
Since you cleared it up... I would go, and buy or have a hat made that
somehow indicates that she is your girl.

Make it clever, and don't make it too obvious... you do in fact want her to
WEAR the hat...
Author:  Randomness [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 8:20 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Since you cleared it up... I would go, and buy or have a hat made that
somehow indicates that she is your girl.

Make it clever, and don't make it too obvious... you do in fact want her to
WEAR the hat...


I know this may be asking for a bit much, but could you give me an example of something that wouldn't make it obvious, yet shows indication that she's my girl?
Author:  hartley1126 [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 8:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Buying matching hats? Sounds to me like you're in the friend zone big time...Matching hats? That sounds like point of no return shit to me. I wouldn't even waste my time. Don't ruin a good friendship, stop being friends with girls. They don't make good friends imo.
Author:  Randomness [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 8:45 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Buying matching hats? Sounds to me like you're in the friend zone big time...Matching hats? That sounds like point of no return shit to me. I wouldn't even waste my time. Don't ruin a good friendship, stop being friends with girls. They don't make good friends imo.

You just havn't found the right ones, girls make good friends IMHO, and i'm sure that alot of people will agree with me saying this. YES, You are correct that i may be shit deep in friend zone, but i'm not going to throw away a friendship i have with this great girl if she doesn't fuck me
Author:  hartley1126 [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 6:40 pm ]
Post subject: 
Yeah definatly don't ruin a friendship, but that sounds to me what you will do if you pursue romance with her. However there is a chance that she will be receptive. You're never going to know until you try, however you just have to realize that by trying, you are going to run the risk of ruining the friendship. And if you do salvage a relationship afterwards, it definatly will not be the same as it was before....so yeah, all I'm saying is GO FOR IT LOL =)
Author:  Reo [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 6:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
You're in the boarder-line zone the girl obviously likes you but needs you to be the man and make the 1st move. If you dont move then kiss it good bye......
Author:  tweeby [ Wed Feb 18, 2009 11:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
She asked if i was interested in a movie this weekend, and i said yes of course, but then i find out it's with some other friends from work as well.
Do NOT under any circumstances, mis-construe her bringing her friends along as an IOD (indicator of disinterest).

Why? Think about it from her point of view. Girls have always been conditioned by society to NOT make the first move. She's asking YOU out, that is massive for her. She WANTS to get with you, close and alone and in the dark like leprechaun said, but her anti-slut defence has her bringing her friends along. I wouldn't bat an eyelid if she mentioned bringing her friends along.
Quote:
You just havn't found the right ones, girls make good friends IMHO, and i'm sure that alot of people will agree with me saying this. YES, You are correct that i may be shit deep in friend zone, but i'm not going to throw away a friendship i have with this great girl if she doesn't fuck me
This is BS! BS! And I am telling you now, the longer you have this attitude the harder it will be for you to pull the trigger. But why are you thinking like this?

I'll tell you why. You're escalating the importance of friendship to such a level that in your head you would be a fool for trying to compromise that. But the only reason you are doing this BECAUSE you are FEARFUL of rejection. Friends don't get get rejected. But then friends don't get laid...


It is time to CHANGE. It is time to take a risk, it's time to break that rapport, which is why I disagree with what hartley initially said (but agree with his later sentences):
Quote:
Yeah definatly don't ruin a friendship
You HAVE to take that risk.

And if you're in the cinema together (albeit with her friends) and you don't make a move, it won't only be YOU that's disappointed. It will be her as well.
Author:  blazerfan [ Thu Feb 19, 2009 12:01 am ]
Post subject: 
When you are talking to her one day. Slow down the conversation while looking into her eyes. Then look at her lips, and keep slowing down the conversation. Then look into her eyes again and kiss her.
Author:  LEPRECHAUN [ Thu Feb 19, 2009 12:24 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
When you are talking to her one day. Slow down the conversation while looking into her eyes. Then look at her lips, and keep slowing down the conversation. Then look into her eyes again and kiss her.
Do the "Soul Gazing" routine before you kiss her...

Look into her RIGHT EYE while you talk to her. This is the eye that has a
direct link to your heart.

Triangular Gazing before moving in for the kiss...

Look at her RIGHT eye, then look at her LEFT eye, then look at her LIPS..

Then kiss her.
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