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| Path to re-attracting an ex? (At a dead end) https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=36989 |
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| Author: | Walt [ Tue Jan 13, 2009 9:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Path to re-attracting an ex? (At a dead end) |
Not sure how much detail is required but here is the situation. Went out with a girl for 2 years. We broke up a year ago due to travelling and not wanting to have a partner while away for long period of time. When we were going out I turned very AFC and needy and I felt although she really cared for me the attraction had gone at the end. (Or she had forced it out due to the relationship no longer being possible) We have both been back in the country for about 5 months now. I have completely changed. Since we went out I have vastly improved my confidence and improved socially. I have learnt massively from how I behaved back then and gone a long way to correcting mistakes. I have been in contact regular contact with her in this year after we broke up, whilst travelling etc we are very good friends. Since shes been back we have met up on a number of ocassions however always at my suggestion. We do exciting things and I know she is having a good time being with me, laughing alot long conversations, high energy activities. However it never really goes that step further, I have slowly initated kino on her again trying to move away from the friends stage. She hasn't always reacted to this receptively, sort of seems to shy up. Sometimes she'll play back, hitting me etc. One time I felt I could have k-closed. She is definitely not seeing anyone and its clear she isn't really looking. She plays it very cool and I pretty much always initiate contact once every couple of weeks or so usually resulting in meeting up, again at my suggestion but I don't ask in the afc way, more suggest what im doing and it'll be fun. I'm trying to do everything right. I have demonstrated massive value and showed her I've changed for the better. A much more positive mindset to everything and really happy. Job, prospects, busy social calendar, friendly with lots more girls, travel. I've lightly negged her. None of this seems to be having a noticeable effect. How do I go that step further with attracting her to escalate things. I thought playing it very slow would be the best path and taking it easy. But over these few months it hasn't picked up yet. Looking for pointers. Ps. Aware of the oneitus but I'm active outside of her but not really found anyone relationship worthy. These are just casual relationships, and just enjoying myself for the time being. |
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| Author: | Rhum [ Wed Jan 14, 2009 12:20 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Go on a sarging spree. I find that starting the relationship again is stupid and setting a trap for yourself. People can easily make up reasons why they broke up before but the main point is that they broke up. You broke up because you two didn't want to deal with a long distance relationship but the thing is you two BROKE UP. Why? You guys gave up on it or she gave up on it but the fact is that someone gave up. Are you willing to take the chance to have someone give up again? If you can't forget about her and move on then I guess you can try to kiss close her. |
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| Author: | Walt [ Wed Jan 14, 2009 9:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Anyone got another opinion to throw at this? Thanks! |
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| Author: | NYSFINEST01 [ Wed Jan 14, 2009 9:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Well depending on if your trying to just k-close and be back with her or if your trying to f-close and see where it's going. My problem with seeing my ex is I lose my focus b/c I get into a comfort zone, but that's no more. What you need to do is still talk to her but still have other girls you can talk to. As for her, your doing a good job b/c she still wants to hang out with you, but I do warn you that you have to make a move soon b/c that excitement that you guys have now waon't last forever, especially if she meets a new guy. Also DO NOT, I REPEAT DO NOT, mention anything about your past relationship with her, and if you must make sure it stays at a positive tone then cut it short. Let us know what happens Good Luck |
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