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Going out alone?
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Author:  cherman [ Sun Dec 14, 2008 3:13 pm ]
Post subject:  Going out alone?
Hey there,

Whenever I go out, it's usually with my friends, and I usually don't have much fun.

We usually just sit around somewhere and talk, and I never feel like I have any stories as cool as theirs to tell (I'm very AFC, and I know it, and they know it). That, or they are talking about something I can't relate to, or know nothing about. I usually zone out, and get pretty depressed when that happens.

With my circle of friends back home, this is making me feel alienated, and I usually become even more AFC and Beta when I'm home, and it's really awkward and depressing.

To top it all off, I'm not a talker at the best of times, and when i go out I'd rather go dance or do something active with no talking. Nobody wants to though! And I always feel awkard around my mates when I go to clubs, because I want to involve some girls in the dancing, but I feel so AFC/Beta around my mates I don't have the courage too.

So, for the tl;dnr version:

Is it advisable to go out alone, or should you always be with mates?

So far when I've been alone at festivals/concerts/parties I've had interesting things happen to me, or talked to random people. My only K-close with someone I'd met that night was at a party I went to with some girls I'd never really talked to before. But at all these times, I've had friends or family to fall back on.

I've been thinking if I can get over my shyness issue with random people, have some fun, and get some cool stories to tell, i might not feel so alienated and bored when I do go out with my mates.

I'm just afraid I'll look like some friendless loser if I go out alone.
Author:  Stygian [ Sun Dec 14, 2008 3:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
Go out with friends by all means but if you aren't going to have any fun with them I would not see the point in it. It would make more sense for you to go out alone since you don't seem to have fun with your friends and you would get used to going out without any kind of crutch to help you. Solo sarging is a great way to get the hang of things.
Author:  AceofSpades07 [ Sun Dec 14, 2008 5:05 pm ]
Post subject: 
yea if your buddies are just bringing you down then there hurting you. But id like to point out that if you cant have a convo with your own friends, how can you expect to do it with strangers. Practice controlling the frame and you convo techniques dude im sure it will help.
Author:  silverito [ Sun Dec 14, 2008 5:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
why the hell not. Hell yes. As I noticed people here tend to say if you go out alone you DLV and apear as a loner with no friends, but I say the opposite: its definetely alpha behaviour because you (unlike most of the guys) have courage to go to the club alone. You are no wussy. And I confirm that with my experience - some of my best pick ups were when I was sarging clubs alone. Actually most of the time I went alone I picked up.
Author:  cherman [ Sun Dec 14, 2008 6:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
yea if your buddies are just bringing you down then there hurting you. But id like to point out that if you cant have a convo with your own friends, how can you expect to do it with strangers. Practice controlling the frame and you convo techniques dude im sure it will help.
I can generally hold convos. My main issue is just that i'm afraid what people will say, or if they won't react positively. That, and I also have trouble getting into the right frame of mind. I'm pretty susceptible to other people's moods and reactions. If I make a joke, and no one laughs, it's enough to ruin my night.

Stupid question, but what exactly is the frame? I read the definition, but I don't really get it.

silverito, i was afraid it might be a big DLV, which is why I asked. I'm guessing it can be a DLV if you act weird about it? But that's not a problem, I just want to get out and try to pick up and have fun, without worrying about what my friends think or want to do. Seems like a good way to overcome shyness as well.
Author:  AceofSpades07 [ Sun Dec 14, 2008 9:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
The Frame is the underlying tone in a conversation. Its not exactly what you say but how things are taken. Just have a lot more confidence in your self. Your an alpha male and you need to beleive that. You dont care if the people your talking to respond negatively because their are so many other girls that are out there.
Author:  silverito [ Mon Dec 15, 2008 12:46 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:


silverito, i was afraid it might be a big DLV, which is why I asked. I'm guessing it can be a DLV if you act weird about it? But that's not a problem, I just want to get out and try to pick up and have fun, without worrying about what my friends think or want to do. Seems like a good way to overcome shyness as well.
Thats right, you go out alone and you have fun and you look like the one who has fun and 100% comfortable that you are alone. People and women will think Who IS this guy :twisted:

Quote:
If I make a joke, and no one laughs, it's enough to ruin my night.
Its your inner game :) For example if I make a joke and no one laughs I instantly make a joke about how stupid/lame/boring joke it was and we all laugh. Take it easy life is good, don't worry about such a tiny things :)
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