PUA Forum :: Help an idiot with serious oneitis

Quote:

New here.
I'm 25, fairly attractive, had a few long term relationships with some one offs on the side, kill count of 30.
Got chatting to this girl on OKC. About a weeks worth of irregular chat before we meet. I go to hers, we go for pizza, have a few drinks and really hit it off, probably one of the best dates i've had. Her mind is just like mine except a little more energetic, but have very similar interests.

It's amazing how men are ready to get married on the first date, and women are so chill.

Quote:

me
I dont know when i get a bit too much, im rusty
her
oh pipe down! I'm just busy

Jesus.

Quote:

me
I'm busy too, building a dating site where people have to give tickles and both share their cum. I'll call it cumtickle dating

This is horrific and creepy. Also, a perfect example of how you can talk a girl out of ever touching you again over texting.

This is why anyone who knows anything about women knows that texting is for setting up meets ONLY unless a girl says "I love you" and/or commits to you.

Quote:

Friday (the friday after the above convo which was sunday. I had unfriended her because she hadnt contacted me at all despite being online a lot)
her

lol, that is being completely emotionally-uncentered. It happens, man. As long as you learn from it....

Quote:

I've been busy. . . but the de-friending was a bit of a low blow
me
You'll live!
her
You will too

see you around
me
Haha, you're cold
But next time be upfront, the I'm busy excuse doesn't fly for a Facebook addict
her
That's your issue! I was genuinely looking forwards to seeing you again as I have been stupidly busy!
me
What times your break
me (today)
I legit thought you lost interest because I went a bit daft when drunk. I do want to see you again, I miss the rabbit.
She read it and didnt respond

This was embarrassing to read. So needy. So desperate.

You're lashing out at her for not giving you attention 24/7.

This is why I and others have a "no text rule" after having sex with a woman (or fooling around). You are coming off thirsty as hell, like you never get sex.

Had you not contacted her after making her cum (bravo by the way, most guys have no clue), and waited for her to hit you up, you would come off as a chill guy mentally capable of handling an attractive woman.

But this did not happen. Attractive women love to chase, love mystery, and love stewing over the guy they fooled around with the night before. You offered no chase. You didn't give her space, and now you're friend zoned despite making her cum, which really, really means you went off the deep end.

Never, ever discuss "you + her meta" with a woman you are not in an exclusive relationship with (if you don't know what meta is, look it up).

Women are much better at men in terms of "living in the moment" and multitasking. They don't want "talks" or to analyze shit. They want to have fun, and feel good in the moment, day to day until they are begging you to be exclusive.

Your text game is ruining your in-person game. you need a complete overhaul. Suggestions:

1. When you text a new or newish girl, text as if you are in bed with three naked women. You're texts will look like this: "cool", "sweet", "alright", "sounds good", not the emotional diarrhea in your texting example.

2. Only text to arrange meets.

As far as this specific girl, cease all contact. Unfortunately, you have to run what I call a "needy cleanse". A week or two of no contact has a chance of erasing your needy mistakes. But for this girl I'd go even longer. I'd just disappear and game other women. The fact you made her orgasm is a huge advantage for you. If she gets horny enough for you, she'll contact you again.

Author:	HotNight223 [ Sat Nov 19, 2016 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:	Help an idiot with serious oneitis
New here. I'm 25, fairly attractive, had a few long term relationships with some one offs on the side, kill count of 30. Got chatting to this girl on OKC. About a weeks worth of irregular chat before we meet. I go to hers, we go for pizza, have a few drinks and really hit it off, probably one of the best dates i've had. Her mind is just like mine except a little more energetic, but have very similar interests. One thing leads to another and i stay over, she falls asleep, but in the morning i make her cum with my fingers pretty quickly. She says no guy has done that before and that I can make her cum quicker than she can herself. She also sorts me out a few times but denies sex. I leave and she says she wants to see me again. This is where i go full AFC. I'm just going to copy/paste the convo for you all to laugh at and roast me. Basically Sunday night (I met her Friday night) was UFC 205 So i got a bit drunk watching McGregor destroy Alvarez. Normally i'd stay aloof and chill but when ive drank, i just forgot how to game and went beta. This is how it went up until today. Prior to this conversation she heavily suggested meeting up a second time but cut that bit out as its nothing to worry about: her oh arrogance always a strong trait me most cave in and go submissive to arrogance, one the other day didnt and got all butt hurt over it, said because shes Italian 'we dont stand for that'. Didnt realise your nationality dictated your personality. She was only a 5/10 still 1/10 more than you but whatever her It must have hurt your feelings when someone didn't allow you to get what you want me Dont bring that up (i was refering to her denying sex) her I'm not - I'm bringing up the fact she didn't go submissive to arrogance and it obviously annoyed you me there was more to it but cba to explain. You know im not THAT arrogant her And you know I'm just trolling you me your trolling is really dry, mine is more outrageous so its easier to detect i'll show my hand and admit its what makes me attracted to you her The trolling or the dryness me both her Thanks �� me enjoy your ego orgasm, courtesy of me, as usual her I will and I am makes a change to you telling me I'm on the spectrum me You likely are, but that doesn't mean you're undateable her I didn't say that Just telling someone they're on the spectrum won't give them an ego orgasm me I did an online test which told me i could be you did say my mannerisms are odd, ive yet to hear an example though me Have i upset you? her don't flatter yourself! I'm just watching a film! me I dont know when i get a bit too much, im rusty her oh pipe down! I'm just busy me I'm busy too, building a dating site where people have to give tickles and both share their cum. I'll call it cumtickle dating Friday (the friday after the above convo which was sunday. I had unfriended her because she hadnt contacted me at all despite being online a lot) her de-friended? Ouch! Is it because I didn't have sex with you!? me I figured you had lost interest after my drunken shit talk on Sunday. On the plus side I've stayed sober for 3 days her I've been busy. . . but the de-friending was a bit of a low blow me You'll live! her You will too see you around me Haha, you're cold But next time be upfront, the I'm busy excuse doesn't fly for a Facebook addict her That's your issue! I was genuinely looking forwards to seeing you again as I have been stupidly busy! me What times your break me (today) I legit thought you lost interest because I went a bit daft when drunk. I do want to see you again, I miss the rabbit. She read it and didnt respond Basically after the meet I didnt contact her unless she did first, which she did. Which was when the drunken idiot conversation at the start began. I figured she had lost interest after that convo as she didnt contact me at all throughout the week from Sunday to Friday so i unfriended her on Friday (she hardly uses her phone at all, just facebook message). Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I know its probably fucked now but still, help me out. I have other options on the go, arguably equally attractive but I really like this girl. My game prior to meeting was good, on the date was good (loads of kino) I dont struggle at all IRL, but when ive had a drink i just relapse to a beta, now im mad as fuck with myself for fucking it up big time.

Author:	Mr. Assertive [ Sat Nov 19, 2016 10:38 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Delete all contact with her. That's your cure

Author:	HotNight223 [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 12:07 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
thanks i guess so

Author:	Arch Stanton [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 12:28 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: New here. I'm 25, fairly attractive, had a few long term relationships with some one offs on the side, kill count of 30. Got chatting to this girl on OKC. About a weeks worth of irregular chat before we meet. I go to hers, we go for pizza, have a few drinks and really hit it off, probably one of the best dates i've had. Her mind is just like mine except a little more energetic, but have very similar interests. It's amazing how men are ready to get married on the first date, and women are so chill. Quote: me I dont know when i get a bit too much, im rusty her oh pipe down! I'm just busy Jesus. Quote: me I'm busy too, building a dating site where people have to give tickles and both share their cum. I'll call it cumtickle dating This is horrific and creepy. Also, a perfect example of how you can talk a girl out of ever touching you again over texting. This is why anyone who knows anything about women knows that texting is for setting up meets ONLY unless a girl says "I love you" and/or commits to you. Quote: Friday (the friday after the above convo which was sunday. I had unfriended her because she hadnt contacted me at all despite being online a lot) her lol, that is being completely emotionally-uncentered. It happens, man. As long as you learn from it.... Quote: I've been busy. . . but the de-friending was a bit of a low blow me You'll live! her You will too see you around me Haha, you're cold But next time be upfront, the I'm busy excuse doesn't fly for a Facebook addict her That's your issue! I was genuinely looking forwards to seeing you again as I have been stupidly busy! me What times your break me (today) I legit thought you lost interest because I went a bit daft when drunk. I do want to see you again, I miss the rabbit. She read it and didnt respond This was embarrassing to read. So needy. So desperate. You're lashing out at her for not giving you attention 24/7. This is why I and others have a "no text rule" after having sex with a woman (or fooling around). You are coming off thirsty as hell, like you never get sex. Had you not contacted her after making her cum (bravo by the way, most guys have no clue), and waited for her to hit you up, you would come off as a chill guy mentally capable of handling an attractive woman. But this did not happen. Attractive women love to chase, love mystery, and love stewing over the guy they fooled around with the night before. You offered no chase. You didn't give her space, and now you're friend zoned despite making her cum, which really, really means you went off the deep end. Never, ever discuss "you + her meta" with a woman you are not in an exclusive relationship with (if you don't know what meta is, look it up). Women are much better at men in terms of "living in the moment" and multitasking. They don't want "talks" or to analyze shit. They want to have fun, and feel good in the moment, day to day until they are begging you to be exclusive. Your text game is ruining your in-person game. you need a complete overhaul. Suggestions: 1. When you text a new or newish girl, text as if you are in bed with three naked women. You're texts will look like this: "cool", "sweet", "alright", "sounds good", not the emotional diarrhea in your texting example. 2. Only text to arrange meets. As far as this specific girl, cease all contact. Unfortunately, you have to run what I call a "needy cleanse". A week or two of no contact has a chance of erasing your needy mistakes. But for this girl I'd go even longer. I'd just disappear and game other women. The fact you made her orgasm is a huge advantage for you. If she gets horny enough for you, she'll contact you again.

Author:	HotNight223 [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 1:15 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: Quote: New here. I'm 25, fairly attractive, had a few long term relationships with some one offs on the side, kill count of 30. Got chatting to this girl on OKC. About a weeks worth of irregular chat before we meet. I go to hers, we go for pizza, have a few drinks and really hit it off, probably one of the best dates i've had. Her mind is just like mine except a little more energetic, but have very similar interests. It's amazing how men are ready to get married on the first date, and women are so chill. Quote: me I dont know when i get a bit too much, im rusty her oh pipe down! I'm just busy Jesus. Quote: me I'm busy too, building a dating site where people have to give tickles and both share their cum. I'll call it cumtickle dating This is horrific and creepy. Also, a perfect example of how you can talk a girl out of ever touching you again over texting. This is why anyone who knows anything about women knows that texting is for setting up meets ONLY unless a girl says "I love you" and/or commits to you. Quote: Friday (the friday after the above convo which was sunday. I had unfriended her because she hadnt contacted me at all despite being online a lot) her lol, that is being completely emotionally-uncentered. It happens, man. As long as you learn from it.... Quote: I've been busy. . . but the de-friending was a bit of a low blow me You'll live! her You will too see you around me Haha, you're cold But next time be upfront, the I'm busy excuse doesn't fly for a Facebook addict her That's your issue! I was genuinely looking forwards to seeing you again as I have been stupidly busy! me What times your break me (today) I legit thought you lost interest because I went a bit daft when drunk. I do want to see you again, I miss the rabbit. She read it and didnt respond This was embarrassing to read. So needy. So desperate. You're lashing out at her for not giving you attention 24/7. This is why I and others have a "no text rule" after having sex with a woman (or fooling around). You are coming off thirsty as hell, like you never get sex. Had you not contacted her after making her cum (bravo by the way, most guys have no clue), and waited for her to hit you up, you would come off as a chill guy mentally capable of handling an attractive woman. But this did not happen. Attractive women love to chase, love mystery, and love stewing over the guy they fooled around with the night before. You offered no chase. You didn't give her space, and now you're friend zoned despite making her cum, which really, really means you went off the deep end. Never, ever discuss "you + her meta" with a woman you are not in an exclusive relationship with (if you don't know what meta is, look it up). Women are much better at men in terms of "living in the moment" and multitasking. They don't want "talks" or to analyze shit. They want to have fun, and feel good in the moment, day to day until they are begging you to be exclusive. Your text game is ruining your in-person game. you need a complete overhaul. Suggestions: 1. When you text a new or newish girl, text as if you are in bed with three naked women. You're texts will look like this: "cool", "sweet", "alright", "sounds good", not the emotional diarrhea in your texting example. 2. Only text to arrange meets. As far as this specific girl, cease all contact. Unfortunately, you have to run what I call a "needy cleanse". A week or two of no contact has a chance of erasing your needy mistakes. But for this girl I'd go even longer. I'd just disappear and game other women. The fact you made her orgasm is a huge advantage for you. If she gets horny enough for you, she'll contact you again. Your post is gold dust, and I knew a lot of it when sober anyway, my whole game just fell apart. She is the second girl I had met with (first one F closed in one night) since my ex gf whom i was with for a year, so I am legit rusty. It gave my tendons a workout but I got her to cum 3 times, and she did the same to me. She didnt take long to text me after, a few hours after the meet when the whole shitstorm i posted happened. Prior to that she was saying she was still in shock about the whole thing, that her difficulty in climaxing has ruined past relationships, to which i replied, 'Yea, i'm gifted'. Which went down really well, then, vodka, and the embarrassing conversation you see before you happened. And yes I feel ridiculous because I like her. I have two other dates now lined up for next week but im not invested in them because I like this one. I'll just have to force myself to get over it. The irony of the whole thing was, 3 days before we met i got chatting to her again (i ceased contact originally after finding out she lives an hour away), she asked what i had been up to, and i straight up said I just got home from a date, she digged on the details and i told her i fucked this other girl. After telling her that she was super interested. She even brought it up in the night saying stuff like, 'why are you so horny, you got laid 3 days ago?'. Thanks for your response anyway, I have a lot to learn, or rather just stop drinking

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Author:	Artfuldodger82 [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 5:22 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
the more I read such posts, and the more I experience this in my life, I am starting to fully grasp the curse of the text.... lol...so many things can go wrong. I think the guys are right, text only to setup dates and text as if you are in bed with three hot naked women....

Author:	HotNight223 [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:16 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: the more I read such posts, and the more I experience this in my life, I am starting to fully grasp the curse of the text.... lol...so many things can go wrong. I think the guys are right, text only to setup dates and text as if you are in bed with three hot naked women.... I met her online. A lot of girls are shy/creeped out if you call her as soon as you number close, and will never meet unless you build rapport first. The girl in the OP i facebooked regularly for a few days before we met.

Author:	Sonny Lofthus [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 6:53 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: Delete all contact with her. That's your cure this helped me a year ago...

Author:	HotNight223 [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 7:07 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Do you think its salvageable at all? My only saving grace was how easily i made her cum. I'm such an idiot

Author:	Mr. Assertive [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 7:39 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: Do you think its salvageable at all? My only saving grace was how easily i made her cum. I'm such an idiot Why can't you listen to my advice ? Do it, you will grow as a man.

Author:	HotNight223 [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 7:42 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: Quote: Do you think its salvageable at all? My only saving grace was how easily i made her cum. I'm such an idiot Why can't you listen to my advice ? Do it, you will grow as a man. I have. I never had her number saved and deleted her facebook on the friday which is in the convo. She can still message me on there, not blocking her that just comes across even more butthurt.

Author:	Arch Stanton [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 9:41 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: Do you think its salvageable at all? Yes, it is salvageable. But the way to fix it will feel counter-intuitive at first. But if you want to succeed with hot women, you must learn it. You simply have to out wait women. It could be a week, months, years. It all depends on the woman and how bad you fucked up. It also depends on how you show up after the mistakes with the woman. Also, fuck Facebook. Always transition to a phone number and insist on using that to communicate. She should have your number, and you should have hers. So how do you out wait a girl when you want her badly? You have to develop an abundance mentality. All attractive women have this mentality. They have numerous men blowing up their phones/social media and hitting on them at work. Sex is easy to get for a woman like this. They have their pick of who they want, when they want. So what gets them wet, and their mind spinning is a man who is a challenge. These men are rare and treasured. 99% of men do not have this mentality because they are desperate, needy, and emotionally-uncentered. But, if you have 2-3 girls on your phone and one of them in your bed, who are as cute as your one-itis, slowly and surely your one-itis will begin to look and feel like the others: Replaceable. And if your one-itis sees you with other women and still has attraction for you, guess who'll be blowing up your phone at 12 am? It happens like clockwork. And by that point, you may not even want her anymore. But do you see the power here? How the game is played? You must master your emotions and display infinite patience. Do not text while drunk/high. A story that relates: I'm 40, and I date a 21 year old underwear model. She's ridiculous. We've been together 11 months or so. Last night she's out with her friends from college at the bars. They are all getting wild. All of these hometown people are on her, bad. Girls, guys, whatever. I meet up at the bar, then take her home ( I let her make out with a girl while I'm there, because well, freedom can be really hot). While I'm fucking her, she starts praising me for not "worshiping at her feet like all the other guys", "tells me she loves how I make her work for it, how I challenge her, and how I let her live her life". She just goes on and on. And this is 11 months in. Often times, we are our worst enemy. And for many guys, texting is such an Achilles heel, along with possessiveness and too-eager relationship vibes. It's pretty simple: reduce your weaknesses, amplify your strengths.

Author:	Sonny Lofthus [ Sun Nov 20, 2016 10:59 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
A wise person once told me: every young man must experience a complete disappointment in love to be emotionally stronger.

Author:	Curtis72 [ Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:50 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Quote: Also, fuck Facebook. Always transition to a phone number and insist on using that to communicate. She should have your number, and you should have hers. Is it a big deal whether you Facebook her or text? If you're only using it to make dates I wouldn't expect it to matter all that much, especially as everyone has FB on their phone.

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Author:	Arch Stanton [ Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:58 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help an idiot with serious oneitis
Yes, it does matter. Everything on Facebook infers "friendship" or family. also, you are amongst the cattle and sheep there. Sending a girl an IM on Facebook and liking her posts before you're in a relationship says this about you: "Hi, I'm one of your dorky male orbiters. I spend all day on Facebook. " Texting a girl on her phone says "I'm getting right to business". One is a pro-sexual environment (her cell phone buzzing on her bed next to her, your text popping up), the other is family shopping day at Wal Mart, with perhaps your IM photo bubble popping up next to grandpa. How do you want to show up? Also, not all women have Facebook Messenger on their phones. That's required now to get IM's. I'm not trying to be a dick, but I regularly see the world of 20-something girls, and they show me their phones all the time. For whatever reason they just resent dudes hitting them up on Facebook. It's hilarious how venomous they can be. As a dominant male, do you want to be at the mercy of something called a "friend request"? I don't friend request girls I'm fucking, and if they request me I let it drag out forever and tease them about it when they get mad as to why I won't accept them. haha. They get pretty mad, but in a cute way. Love/dating is playful. You can be the semi-mysterious lover who cums on her face, or you can be the FB pal with your photo next to Uncle Joe. I see those chodes when my gf shows me her and he friends FB's. Just dudes lined up, liking her photos, kissing the princesses feet. A few have bedded her in the past, but it didn't last long. They are now a long chain of chum orbiters, limp and doomed forever to never touching her again. But hey, they can click her like button. There's never a reason to ask a girl out on Facebook. If you know where she works, ask her out there. If you know her number, ask her out over text.