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**HELP ME PLEASE!!** - girl tells me to flex, what to do?
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Author:  Tamahome [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 1:21 am ]
Post subject:  **HELP ME PLEASE!!** - girl tells me to flex, what to do?
***IN HIGH SCHOOL***

Ok, so a few weeks ago, we were doing a project where people go in front of the class and present stuff. Now, my seat is in the front, so my seat was taken up, and I was to sit in whose ever seat was presenting. A guy went up, and I got to sit next to this EXTREMELY hot girl. Now she sits next to another "above-average" (I'd say like 7 maybe) girl, who I think is her best friend. Behind me was this girl (not really hot at all) who they're not really friends with, but they talk/are friendly to her, and I sort of knew her, talked to her sometimes.

OK, so I was sitting and the guy is presenting, and they all start giggling. I turn around and I'm like "what?" I get nothing, turn back around, but they still kept on giggling, and i kept turning and saying "what" a few more times (started smiling.) At the end, after the guy was over, I stood up, was going back to my seat, and the girl that was behind me (the one I "knew") grabbed my arm. I was like what? And she said there was something on my arm, and they where all laughing so I was like what is it?

Then while I'm looking at my arm, the REALLY hot girl's friend comes up and grabs my arm also. I'm like standing there and I pretended not to notice because she was just walking and grabbed it real fast (I was really embarrassed, but I don't think i showed it.)

Then, the girl that I knew, asked me to flex and i was like "What? no" (smiling) and she was like "come on, do it for {the really hot girl's name}" I was like "what? no lol".

Now I went back to my seat, and I tried to not look in that general direction for the rest of the class. We're on opposite sides of the class room, so we never really like talk to or anything, but I didn't approach them the next day, and after that was spring break.

I came back from spring break yesterday, and We all went to the library, so everyone was closer together. Me and the really hot girl crossed eyes a few times.

Then today, she came up with some of her friends, and asked me If I had notecards, and another one in the group is like "{myname} has notecards" but I didn't, so i said no. T_T

We didn't talk for the rest of the period, but like, I think she's interested in me, what should i do?

I really suck at talking to girls, especially the ones who I think are hot..HELP!!!

I'm sorry it's so damn long..T_T
Author:  -Code- [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 1:36 am ]
Post subject: 
Sounds like a compliance testing.
Instead of jumping through their hoop you should have turned it around on them Or had them jump a hoop first. Like making them flex first or having them hand on you while you pose. Either way these girls are opening you. Do something about it.

I remember when I was in 9th grade I had a thing for this girl. So I set out to attract her. It was going good until one day she came up to me and took my arm. She told me, "Wow you're pretty skinny". I just kind of blanked out cause I knew I was, I didn't say anything but just stood there with a blank look on my face. It was probably a shit test, to see wtf I would do. That girl never talked to me with interest in her voice ever again.
Author:  Tamahome [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 1:43 am ]
Post subject: 
so, are you saying I should've been like "and what do i get out of this?" or something like "this shit aint for free" or something like that?

I mean this was a long time ago, so I'm not sure if they'd say the same thing again, but are you saying I should go and open with them?

I just don't know how to open with a girl like that, I mean all of these guys talk to her all the time, I don't know how to just walk up to her and be like "hi."

I mean she's really hot but doesn't have the bitch shield, she's actually pretty nice.
Author:  Tamahome [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 1:56 am ]
Post subject: 
Wait, sorry, I have another question.

If you say something like "this shit aint for free" is it only when they touch you? Or what?? Can you say it if they just feel you?
Author:  Introvert [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 2:13 am ]
Post subject: 
I would've had them flex first or something, but this shit aint for free can work too.

Also in general try to keep up the talk and get rid of that social anxiety! I used to have some of that, but I just decided to talk more and now it's gone; my only problem is a kind of apathy towards speaking at times, I believe I'm an HSP. I don't feel anxiety or anything, or real reluctance, just not a want to talk sometimes, like a lazy "I don't feel like it" thing. I just make myself talk and get back in the mood to :)

You can only overcome things by facing them.
Author:  tonatiuh8 [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 2:15 am ]
Post subject: 
That could have been a perfect chance to say something like that.

Or if you are really bold you can tell her to give you a kiss on the cheek. And dont give that BS about "what happens if she thinks im weird or something". You are now letting her take control of YOUR REALITY. Pay attention to the word YOUR REALITY.
Author:  delta4ce [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 2:38 am ]
Post subject: 
possible C&F response to the overall situation:

tell her to flex first [convince her to...]
she flexes-- [im assuming shes not butch or anything]

and that is why people pay to see these [pointing to your own arm] and not those [her arm]

you should be able to pull this off no matter how muscular you are, but if you don't feel comfortable doing something like this [if you're not muscular] don't.. it's very possible that it could come off as fake/trying too hard
[EDIT]: the whole "feeling comfortable" part-- its a matter of confidence, which is why you should just exude confidence-- remember that you're the prize... when she asks you to flex-- "im not going to until you do.." and then cross your arms and ignore her until she does.. "wait, i wasn't looking, do it again"... i think you can get the idea
Author:  Lucius [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 2:57 am ]
Post subject: 
good replys
Author:  Tamahome [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 3:20 am ]
Post subject: 
WOW GUYS! Amazing replies!

Yah, I mean guess it is a confidence thing, it's just the thing is, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY!

Like if I'm not trying I can talk about anything, but If i'm around a pretty girl or something I just feel like all the stuff I have to talk about is completely worthless.

Anyways, I'll try to approach her tomorrow...I'll wear a tight shirt or something and go stand in front of her so I can see if I can get the same question..XD.

Thanks a lot, you guys are a great help! ^_^
Author:  96Firebird [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 4:13 am ]
Post subject: 
Its unlikely you will get the same question asked again, but you can try. Just remember, even though she is hot does not mean she is something special. She is just another person, treat her as one. This will get rid of some of the anxiety you have. Oh, and you will have to start the convo. The only reason they started it last time was because it was a group thing, people gain confidence when they are in groups.
Author:  Tamahome [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 4:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well. I tried talking to her today, and I dind't really gt anything... :(

I talked to her about soe project that we where doing, and she like really didn't seem interested at all, she was all like "Yah..."

I felt like I made a complete ass out of myself, and dind't really talk to her for the rest of class. That sucked.. =/
Author:  delta4ce [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 10:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Well. I tried talking to her today, and I dind't really gt anything... :(

I talked to her about soe project that we where doing, and she like really didn't seem interested at all, she was all like "Yah..."

I felt like I made a complete ass out of myself, and dind't really talk to her for the rest of class. That sucked.. =/
hey don't stress over it...
really, make sure you aren't trying too hard-- when i say that, i mean that you shouldn't have to force conversation on someone. so, when you're talking, be interesting. people who are interesting are upbeat, confident, [a lot of times] funny, and act like what they are saying is important, no matter what the subject is...
so, most likely, a chick in hs isn't going to be all that enthralled about a project-- maybe something happened on a popular tv show the nite before that you should talk about; maybe there was something exciting in the news; maybe you heard a funny story...
try involving her in whatever you're talking about-- maybe one of those things that you found interesting [tv/news/story] reminded you of her or something that she said?

also, remember that if you consistently try to start conversation with her, she will notice-- the key is that she will ALSO notice whether or not she is interested in the convos you start... if they're interesting enough, she should be willing at some point to start convos on her own
Author:  theredbandit [ Fri Mar 28, 2008 1:52 am ]
Post subject: 
im a jacked wrestler, i get this all the time. i either say, "how about a pose?" then i do a greek pose acting mock serious. otherwise i pretend to blow up my bicep with my thumb in my mouth.
Author:  Tamahome [ Fri Mar 28, 2008 3:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks delta4ce, I guess I'll try to not try too hard..XD. And i'll try to start more interesting convos.

Also yeah, I wrestle as well, XD...What weight class are you? ^_^. I was 145 last season, probably going to go 160 for Freestyle though.
Author:  theredbandit [ Sun Apr 06, 2008 7:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
haha where u from? i qualified for state at 135 in wisconsin as a sophmore. im gonna wrestle greco state at 140 then go to northern plains. u should go and we'll wing each other.
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