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| Girl Putting the Brakes on Escalation After Closing Her? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=187212 |
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| Author: | Valesti [ Sun Jan 18, 2015 3:36 am ] |
| Post subject: | Girl Putting the Brakes on Escalation After Closing Her? |
I'll try to contextualize the situation in a very succinct manner. The Lead-Up This girl very recently had a boyfriend (who goes to my school). She was being extremely flirtatious with me, both in person and over text, even sending risque photos of herself. At that point, I tell her that we both obviously want this to happen, but I'm not willing to do what she wants me to (implied: help her cheat on her BF. Just didn't sit right with me.) She agrees, and breaks up with her BF the following day. To be even more clear, she didn't really break up with her BF to be with me - she just wanted to be untethered to one guy and have a lot of fun with multiple people. Totally the person I'm down for. The Success and Simultaneous Failure The same night she breaks up with her BF, I close and get with her. Hooray. I thought this was going to be a momentous occasion, but something odd happens: after a few seconds, she pulls away, and says "I think I just need more time." We keep seeing each other a few times a week. I get to the close, we start kissing, yet she consistently pulls away after a few seconds every time. It's been about 2 weeks since they've broken up. I asked her if it was because she thought I was kissing weirdly or something (rhythms don't also match up), but she said that that wasn't the case - she thought we had a great rhythm and I was one of the better kissers she's had. I totally understand that everyone needs time after their break up. What I don't understand, though, is that she has definitely told me that she has been getting with other people (2nd base or beyond). Where to Go Next? Thus, I'm wondering, if the kissing isn't bad - and she doesn't "need time" when it relates to other people, as she's going a lot farther with them - what needs to change? 1. Is it because she really does need time? To be fair, her BF did in fact go to my school - is that getting in the way? 2. Is it because she doesn't really want to get with me, and is kind of just BSing me? If so, do I distance myself and let her figure out whether or not she even wants to get with me? 3. Do I call her out? As in, tell her that it makes zero sense that she doesn't "need time" for other people, but "needs time" for me? In all, the situation just seems really odd. Like, she incited the entire romantic relationship, and now that it has reached the point where she wanted it to go, she's putting the brakes on it. Any insights are very helpful. Thanks guys. |
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| Author: | Mr. Assertive [ Sun Jan 18, 2015 4:24 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girl Putting the Brakes on Escalation After Closing Her? |
Just treat it as last minute resistance. One time I had this one chick who is a bit older who was so stuck on having sex with someone while in a relationship. She knew what I was about. We go on dates, I pull out ALL the moves, find out what turns her on...and you know leave her wanting more. Eventually she gets to the BJ's...and eventually she tells me she wants me to stay over one of these nights. Just like that...even when I reminded her of what she told me and told her we really shouldn't yadda yadda...pretty much sides were switched. I can tell she will be clingy if I fuck her...not trying to deal with that. So who knows what happens. Don't try to justify what she is doing, you will be wasting mental effort and the girl will start to rationalize that what they are doing is right. Another example...there was a girl who got around at my old school. It was my turn one night, she gave me the whole, I don't think we should be doing this thing, so I just kept plowing through put out all the stops and finally f closed. I thought that would relate to your situation. Don't lose your cool man. Have other girls to focus on and this little problem will solve itself. |
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| Author: | Valesti [ Mon Jan 19, 2015 3:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girl Putting the Brakes on Escalation After Closing Her? |
That was actually really helpful advice, Mr. Assertive, thank you. What you said about focusing on other girls is really important - I imagine if I rework and emphasize my abundance mentality, I won't sweat this as much. I'll try and see if I can just pull out some moves to get her more turned on, and we'll see where it goes. |
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