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First Date Advice!!
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Author:  Moose185 [ Mon Oct 13, 2014 9:11 pm ]
Post subject:  First Date Advice!!
I've been on here before asking for first date advice. I've never been great on first dates I don't usually make a move on a girl which is a problem.

I was wondering if someone on here could answer my following first date questions.

1. What should I wear on a first date?

2. How should I let her know i'm interested?

3. How do I go about escalating into a kiss?

4. how should I end the date?

The reason I ask all of these questions is i've been on a lot of dates maybe 20 first dates and not got a second date from any of them. I've not really made a move on the girl on the first date either. I need serious help. I really want to get it right for the first time in my life.

thanks.
Author:  JackZero [ Mon Oct 13, 2014 10:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
1. What should I wear on a first date?
Something that fits the activity that you're going to do for your date.
Quote:
2. How should I let her know i'm interested?
Flirt with her and kino. What I try to do is open the date with a hug and a kiss on the cheek when we initially meet up for a date.
Quote:
3. How do I go about escalating into a kiss?
While escalating your kino, you should make sure she's comfortable with you. Start sharing space with her and once you have her comfortable being in her space while flirting with her and escalating more kino...go for your kiss.
Quote:
4. how should I end the date?
At least a kclose and her committing to another date.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Mon Oct 13, 2014 10:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
Quote:
1. What should I wear on a first date?
Something that fits the activity that you're going to do for your date.
Quote:
2. How should I let her know i'm interested?
Flirt with her and kino. What I try to do is open the date with a hug and a kiss on the cheek when we initially meet up for a date.
Quote:
3. How do I go about escalating into a kiss?
While escalating your kino, you should make sure she's comfortable with you. Start sharing space with her and once you have her comfortable being in her space while flirting with her and escalating more kino...go for your kiss.
Quote:
4. how should I end the date?
At least a kclose and her committing to another date.

All that needs to be said. Perfect summary.
Author:  fishnwomen [ Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
I like what was said above, I would also add that you should keep the conversation about her. Get her talking about herself a lot, and be mysterious yourself.

Ask her about her travels, adventures, passions, motives, dreams, free time, childhood, etc.

Basically, get her talking about subjects that she is emotionally attached to.
Author:  Vandal PUA [ Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Yep, keep it touchy.

If you're going the PUA route don't do dates. Just give her a reason to come over and kino...

And that's the seceret to a K-close, be touchy (if she's comfortable with it).
Author:  oceanx [ Tue Oct 14, 2014 4:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
If you're going the PUA route don't do dates. Just give her a reason to come over and kino...
Perfect advice. Alternately to this could do a low time investment thing like a walk in a nearby park and segue to your place.
Author:  J.Daniels [ Tue Oct 14, 2014 3:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
I disagree with what the other guy said about her committing to another date. End the date by telling her you had a good time, then leave it 3-4 days and call her, set up another date. Asking for another date before your first one has even ended is just pathetic, makes you look like you have no other options and you don't expect her to want to see you again. Act like you KNOW she'll see you again, and you'll be in touch next time you've got a fun activity that you'd like to invite her along to.
Author:  JackZero [ Tue Oct 14, 2014 3:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
I disagree with what the other guy said about her committing to another date. End the date by telling her you had a good time, then leave it 3-4 days and call her, set up another date. Asking for another date before your first one has even ended is just pathetic, makes you look like you have no other options and you don't expect her to want to see you again. Act like you KNOW she'll see you again, and you'll be in touch next time you've got a fun activity that you'd like to invite her along to.
This is good for a girl that has no options. When you've built attraction and don't fclose and then decide to play that 3 day rule, she'll start losing attraction in you. When she knows that she's going to see you again, she'll be anticipating it and once you do see her again you are in a position to open with a kiss rather than starting at a point of rebuilding some of the attraction that you've lost during that time. If another guy asks her out between you 3-4 days waiting, he may be able to damage what attraction that you've built up.

When building attraction it's better to build it steadily so she has that feeling of being swept off of her feet. If you give her breaks to think about things, she'll more than likely find reasons not to be attracted.
Author:  puaninja [ Tue Oct 14, 2014 3:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
1. What should I wear on a first date?
Normal clothes, appropriate for the location. But make sure you look sharp. No flip flops or anything like that.

2. How should I let her know i'm interested?
You don't. You keep her guessing. She should assume you are interested since you are a male and you are on a date with her, but aside from that you don't need to do anything to specifically show you are interested. Once you start with kino and attraction building that will convey your interest.

3. How do I go about escalating into a kiss? Build rapport, qualify, attract, and seduce. Kino will allow you to build up to the kiss and provide you with a mechanism to get ioi's or iod's along the way.

4. how should I end the date? I don't like kissing at the very end of the date unless I've already kissed her earlier. That's why kiss closing shouldn't be done at the end. It's actually not a closing move. The awkward kiss at the end of the date is like from the 50s or something, but that's not how modern PUA's do it. You should be going for escalation and a makeout the whole time. That's the entire point of the date after all. But when you actually end the date, just tell her you had a good time and you'll talk to her later. Don't schedule another date like a desperate loser. Don't ask if you can call her. Just peace the fuck out and give her the impression that you two will talk again, but leave her guessing beyond that.
Author:  J.Daniels [ Tue Oct 14, 2014 7:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
Quote:
I disagree with what the other guy said about her committing to another date. End the date by telling her you had a good time, then leave it 3-4 days and call her, set up another date. Asking for another date before your first one has even ended is just pathetic, makes you look like you have no other options and you don't expect her to want to see you again. Act like you KNOW she'll see you again, and you'll be in touch next time you've got a fun activity that you'd like to invite her along to.
This is good for a girl that has no options. When you've built attraction and don't fclose and then decide to play that 3 day rule, she'll start losing attraction in you. When she knows that she's going to see you again, she'll be anticipating it and once you do see her again you are in a position to open with a kiss rather than starting at a point of rebuilding some of the attraction that you've lost during that time. If another guy asks her out between you 3-4 days waiting, he may be able to damage what attraction that you've built up.

When building attraction it's better to build it steadily so she has that feeling of being swept off of her feet. If you give her breaks to think about things, she'll more than likely find reasons not to be attracted.
The aim is to make the date good enough for her to be thinking about it, wanting you to get in touch, and the exact opposite of losing attraction is what has happened in my experience - most girls get impatient and call me, and we arrange a date. How different is that, compared to what most hot girls are used to? Every guy is asking for another date before the first one has even ended, which is communicating that you don't believe you're good enough to see her again. But thats just me.
Author:  JackZero [ Tue Oct 14, 2014 8:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
The aim is to make the date good enough for her to be thinking about it, wanting you to get in touch, and the exact opposite of losing attraction is what has happened in my experience - most girls get impatient and call me, and we arrange a date. How different is that, compared to what most hot girls are used to? Every guy is asking for another date before the first one has even ended, which is communicating that you don't believe you're good enough to see her again. But thats just me.
Let's think about the logic you have here. Everyone has heard of the 3 day rule, so basically that's what most guys do. It's so overused that even women talk about it and expect it. However, if you're asking for a second date (and asking is pretty unconfident way of doing it) without already knowing what her answer would be, that can come off bad. But if you know that she is having a good time and can't get enough of you, you tell her that you want to do it again. Leave no doubt in her mind that a second date is going to happen and you can be man enough to say it's going to happen directly to her face without having to say "please" or "will you go out with me again" and she will leave her schedule open for you. But saying that it's communicating that you have no confidence is silly.

Perhaps it's that a lot of guys don't know how to come across direct without being needy is where they have a need to play a lot of these strategies. My success with women had significantly improved by saying what I wanted and how I want it to happen.
Author:  J.Daniels [ Wed Oct 15, 2014 1:37 am ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
Quote:
The aim is to make the date good enough for her to be thinking about it, wanting you to get in touch, and the exact opposite of losing attraction is what has happened in my experience - most girls get impatient and call me, and we arrange a date. How different is that, compared to what most hot girls are used to? Every guy is asking for another date before the first one has even ended, which is communicating that you don't believe you're good enough to see her again. But thats just me.
Let's think about the logic you have here. Everyone has heard of the 3 day rule, so basically that's what most guys do. It's so overused that even women talk about it and expect it. However, if you're asking for a second date (and asking is pretty unconfident way of doing it) without already knowing what her answer would be, that can come off bad. But if you know that she is having a good time and can't get enough of you, you tell her that you want to do it again. Leave no doubt in her mind that a second date is going to happen and you can be man enough to say it's going to happen directly to her face without having to say "please" or "will you go out with me again" and she will leave her schedule open for you. But saying that it's communicating that you have no confidence is silly.

Perhaps it's that a lot of guys don't know how to come across direct without being needy is where they have a need to play a lot of these strategies. My success with women had significantly improved by saying what I wanted and how I want it to happen.

That is better than the typical way that I thought you meant it, but "the 3 day rule" isn't even a thing, lol. Most guys just hold out as long as possible and cave the next night at the latest... which I suppose, if you last 3-4 nights, makes you either look strong... or like you've got more options and you might be more of a challenge than she initially thought. I like to phone on say Monday, ask when shes free, then set a date for 3-5 days into the future if I'm available) ...then I'll call her the next week and do the same. I try not to date on weekends, and I call once a week to set a date, then get off the phone - I've got nothing else to talk about that wouldn't be better in person. Having read what you said above though, I wouldn't say that any of our opinions are wrong, or better. I do it my way, you do it yours... none of us drop the old "Will I see you again?" while waiting for that awkward end-of-date kiss. My way is what I learned from Corey Wayne when I was first getting into this stuff. "setting a date, also known as a romantic, fun-filled opportunity for sex to happen" lol. So I've just kind of always stuck to that. I have ended dates with "I've had a good time, lets do it again" and set another date in the past though... if its a girl that I'm already friends with or something, I'd probably set another date while I'm on the date, because I wouldn't be worrying so much about being mysterious and being a challenge and bla bla (unless I was struggling to get out of friend-zone) but if it was a new girl, I'd do mine and call a few days later. Again though, thats just what has worked for me.
Author:  JackZero [ Wed Oct 15, 2014 7:25 am ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
That is better than the typical way that I thought you meant it, but "the 3 day rule" isn't even a thing, lol.
Google 3 day rule and you'll see it is a thing and it is a very old tactic. But if it works for you, by all means do so and continue to do it. If you're okay with waiting 3-5 days to schedule something for an even later date, then I have no problem with that tactic. Me on the other hand, if I didn't fclose with someone that is into me that day, I'll fclose her the next day and again the day after that if I want. In that same 3-5 days I've already decided if I want to keep her around while others are deciding if they've waited long enough to call her.
Author:  J.Daniels [ Wed Oct 15, 2014 10:07 am ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
Quote:
That is better than the typical way that I thought you meant it, but "the 3 day rule" isn't even a thing, lol.
Google 3 day rule and you'll see it is a thing and it is a very old tactic. But if it works for you, by all means do so and continue to do it. If you're okay with waiting 3-5 days to schedule something for an even later date, then I have no problem with that tactic. Me on the other hand, if I didn't fclose with someone that is into me that day, I'll fclose her the next day and again the day after that if I want. In that same 3-5 days I've already decided if I want to keep her around while others are deciding if they've waited long enough to call her.
If I bang a girl on the first date, I probably wont want to see her again until my options are a little low :P

If I don't, I'll set a new date with her when she texts me/a couple days later. If she texts me the very next day, I'll reply when I'm free and set another date.
Author:  neo87 [ Wed Oct 15, 2014 2:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First Date Advice!!
Quote:
If I bang a girl on the first date, I probably wont want to see her again until my options are a little low :P

Why?
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