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Her first question: and On a first date:...
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Author:  BHTrix [ Thu Oct 09, 2014 9:19 am ]
Post subject:  Her first question: and On a first date:...

So I'm checking out some dating sites,.. getting reactions quite a bit, went on my first date which -ended up- being quite horrible.

Let's start with what happened on the site itself. So I'm messaging this chick asking her for her digits, which she didn't give first go, so fine, I ask again, and I get her first question. Now I'm financially stable... but not a very rich guy. I'm a writer, a very creative person, still working on my first novel. I got some issues with money from growing up, so all that combined = I might be a bit biased, and that's why I was looking for some input from other people.
Her first question was: and I quote
how about your job? keep writing?

So, for me that's it.. that's over. I'm not looking for a golddigger. How I read that is, I'm looking for a nice guy to support me, buy me clothes and dinner, and maybe I'll give him some sex in return. I don't think writing is a profession that will be able to do that, so are you planning to keep writing or are you going to flip burgers at the burger king so you'll be able to support my needs? But as I said, I might be a bit biased, I was hoping for some input. I, anyhow, lost all interest.

Then my first date. Now this girl I was with was constantly and openly psycho-analyzing me. Now I understand that it might be a test, and as long as I think it's cute... but dear God that shit's annoying. At that moment it wasn't a deal breaker for me, I can appreciate it because when I do reflect it does help me grow and become a better person. Afterwards I figured, nah, I'm not looking for a therapist either. So here's what happened; and I can see where it went wrong, and what I should do differently next time (not how yet though), however, something in the back of my skull tells me that the only reason that went wrong is because of how she interpreted it. So again, looking for your input.

At this moment I wasn't sure yet if I was interested in a second date, the conversation died and I figured we'd been chatting long enough for our first date, time for me to bail and maybe plan a second date.
So I check my phone, and we've been sitting there for an hour and I tell her: Shall we leave it at this?
My tone of voice was asking a friendly question. So I get off the bar stool, tell her my ass is now wooden and she thanks me for the thee and walks straight out the door. Not just that, I was left with an intense feeling of what was a very very bad negative feeling, that I still find very hard to place, and in all fairness I did not see it coming.

So, did I just fuck that shit up bad or did that girl have some major issues and I accidentally triggered one of them.

input mucho appreciated!

Author:  TheFury [ Thu Oct 09, 2014 5:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Her first question: and On a first date:...

Quote:
So I'm checking out some dating sites,.. getting reactions quite a bit, went on my first date which -ended up- being quite horrible.

Let's start with what happened on the site itself. So I'm messaging this chick asking her for her digits, which she didn't give first go, so fine, I ask again, and I get her first question. Now I'm financially stable... but not a very rich guy. I'm a writer, a very creative person, still working on my first novel. I got some issues with money from growing up, so all that combined = I might be a bit biased, and that's why I was looking for some input from other people.
Her first question was: and I quote
how about your job? keep writing?

So, for me that's it.. that's over. I'm not looking for a golddigger. How I read that is, I'm looking for a nice guy to support me, buy me clothes and dinner, and maybe I'll give him some sex in return. I don't think writing is a profession that will be able to do that, so are you planning to keep writing or are you going to flip burgers at the burger king so you'll be able to support my needs? But as I said, I might be a bit biased, I was hoping for some input. I, anyhow, lost all interest.

Then my first date. Now this girl I was with was constantly and openly psycho-analyzing me. Now I understand that it might be a test, and as long as I think it's cute... but dear God that shit's annoying. At that moment it wasn't a deal breaker for me, I can appreciate it because when I do reflect it does help me grow and become a better person. Afterwards I figured, nah, I'm not looking for a therapist either. So here's what happened; and I can see where it went wrong, and what I should do differently next time (not how yet though), however, something in the back of my skull tells me that the only reason that went wrong is because of how she interpreted it. So again, looking for your input.

At this moment I wasn't sure yet if I was interested in a second date, the conversation died and I figured we'd been chatting long enough for our first date, time for me to bail and maybe plan a second date.
So I check my phone, and we've been sitting there for an hour and I tell her: Shall we leave it at this?
My tone of voice was asking a friendly question. So I get off the bar stool, tell her my ass is now wooden and she thanks me for the thee and walks straight out the door. Not just that, I was left with an intense feeling of what was a very very bad negative feeling, that I still find very hard to place, and in all fairness I did not see it coming.

So, did I just fuck that shit up bad or did that girl have some major issues and I accidentally triggered one of them.

input mucho appreciated!
Read my post I made about Money and Pickup .. in particular the first article ... Not every girl who cares about your career and that you are financially stable is a gold digger. Most actually aren't.

Author:  neo87 [ Thu Oct 09, 2014 5:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Her first question: and On a first date:...

You fucked it up with both girls... This has to be trolling.

Author:  BHTrix [ Thu Oct 09, 2014 9:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Her first question: and On a first date:...

I'm being quite serious and am looking for help, if you're not interested in giving any, why bother replying to this topic;... I'd be more interested in why I fucked up and what I could've done better...

not everyone has tons of experience with women...

Author:  BHTrix [ Thu Oct 09, 2014 9:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Her first question: and On a first date:...

Quote:
Read my post I made about Money and Pickup .. in particular the first article ... Not every girl who cares about your career and that you are financially stable is a gold digger. Most actually aren't.
Think I found it, thanks!

Author:  breedlove465 [ Thu Oct 09, 2014 10:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Her first question: and On a first date:...

Quote:
not everyone has tons of experience with women...
You're not gonna get tons of experience by hitting up girls online. Go and approach and get comfortable around women. Seriously, do it.

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