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| I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=177664 |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 6:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
I met this guy online. I have a drug problem. I knew he was a PUA because I knew about negging, and he negged me and then I was paying attention. He did many other PUA things. It's a long story, but I just want him to drop the PUA stuff, but I feel like he won't. I started doing drugs again and I feel like he is just playing more games with me instead of caring about me doing drugs. It seems like whenever I get feeling good and strong, he says something to give me a kick in the shins. It is really hard to talk about all the stuff we've said. I feel like he's playing some big games, and I wish he would drop it. I'm usually a strong woman when it comes to relationships, but I feel like I'm being lured into something scary. I can't talk about this with anyone else, because they don't know about the PUA stuff. I'm sure you won't want to respond to me, and that's fine. I will be ok either way. I have lots of resources. But if anyone wants to respond, I would be interested in what you have to say. |
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| Author: | GamesSN [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 6:24 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
What makes you so sure he's a PUA? Unless he's employing absolutely every technique chances are he's not a PUA and just the way he is. Also, what's your understanding of a "neg"? Sounds like you infer it to be a way to just put you down and lower your confidence... This is not what a neg is supposed to be. |
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| Author: | Pikeman85 [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 6:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
If he's not treating you the way you want to be treated, drop him. Same advice we'd give a man here. Abundance. |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 6:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Trust me, I know he is a PUA. |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 6:35 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Quote: If he's not treating you the way you want to be treated, drop him.
That is good advice. The problem is, I'm confused about how he is treating me. It is so varied. And I want to see the best in people. But I think I know the truth. I know when people are out for my best interests. I'm not seeing that here. It shouldn't be so complicated.
Same advice we'd give a man here. Abundance. |
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| Author: | GamesSN [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 6:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
I'm still interested in knowing how you think he's a PUA. A lot of women would normally associate "Pick Up" as "dickheadery" and equate anything a guy does that's slightly dickish as being a Pick Up Artist. |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 7:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
I have a very quick answer that I would rather not say here. But, as I said before, trust me, I'm sure. The biggest thing I could say is not going with the flow. There is a flow to things, and I kept on being confounded on why, when things were going good, he would depart or kick me in the shins. Only those times. It seemed like he was always strategizing and very particular and not trusting of me, and I have no idea why, because I'm not an angel, but I'm certainly not the devil either. Most people think I'm very nice, actually. |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 7:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
I just want to add one more thing. In my opinion, much of the PUA stuff is good. I feel very bad for guys who don't understand how preliminary girl-guy interactions work. Girls do want guys to make the first move, and that doesn't come naturally to everyone. There are lots of amazing guys out there who are not putting themselves out there as they should. That being said, I have given a lot of this PUA a lot of slack. I think I may be dealing with a difficult situation. I should focus my attention on my life minus this person. |
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| Author: | Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 7:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Are you looking for a relationship? Or do you just want to fuck him? PUA, not PUA, who gives a fuck, what ever he's doing is working, or you wouldn't be here. What are you on? People on drugs run stop signs, people on weed stop and wait for them to turn green! |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 8:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
I am looking to see his cards. I am not looking for a relationship, that is for sure. And I will be careful about who I fuck. I will not fuck people who treat me like an object. That is not attractive at all. |
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| Author: | Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 8:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Quote: I am looking to see his cards.
If you get to see all his cards, there's no anticipation left. It's like when you've opened your last birthday gift as a child. How many times have you blown out a dude, because he's transparent and boring? |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
I don't understand what you are talking about. If I'm interested in a guy, I'm interested. End of story. All the PUA stuff is just focused on the very first step. |
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| Author: | GamesSN [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:35 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Quote: I don't understand what you are talking about. If I'm interested in a guy, I'm interested. End of story.
No...... There's much more to it than that.
All the PUA stuff is just focused on the very first step. |
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| Author: | Pikeman85 [ Thu Apr 03, 2014 9:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Quote: I don't understand what you are talking about. If I'm interested in a guy, I'm interested. End of story.
No, it's really not just focused on the first step. It's about being a more attractive man to women in general.All the PUA stuff is just focused on the very first step. That includes far more than "opening" or approaching a girl. It includes self improvement, how to take leadership in romance, understanding your value on the dating market (and improving it), and understanding that any one woman isn't necessary for your happiness, and how to escalate a situation sexually without pushing the girl away. There's a lot to it. It isn't just, "Hey, if you're shy, this is how you talk to a girl!" |
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| Author: | just_wondering [ Fri Apr 04, 2014 10:19 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am a woman dealing with a PUA; have questions |
Ok, thanks for your replies! I think I will just keep firm on how I would like to be treated. I honestly don't know why he is acting the way he is acting. I kind of think it's PUA stuff gone awry, but maybe not. Who knows? I'm going to focus my attention on my own issues. |
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