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I screwed this up, please help
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Author:  Zitterhand [ Mon Feb 17, 2014 12:58 am ]
Post subject:  I screwed this up, please help
Hey guys,

this girl means a lot to me and I would really like to get some advice!

I go to college and I recently went one a date with a very hot girl from my university. We went to dinner and both had a very good time, it seemed like everything went perfectly and I know that she likes me a lot. At the end of the dinner I asked her what her plans for this week are and if she wants to meet up again. She told me she wasn't sure yet and I should text her again.

And here it begins where I probably screwed it up a lot.... I sent her a text the next day if she wants to hang out the following day. She told me she was busy and had to do a lot of work. It gets even worse... I heard from a friend of mine whom she knows as well that she was shocked about me not having paid for dinner for her (we split the checks). I shot her a text the next morning saying that in my country (I am a foreign student) it leaves a better impression if you split the checks. She texted back immediately and told me that she did not say that and that everything would be fine. So then I did my next mistake and asked her if she wants to hang out over the weekend.

Now I am sitting here and I haven't gotten a response in three days.
Obviously, I have shown way too much interest and it will be tough to fix this. This girls means a lot to me and I hope that you guys can help me out. The problem is that I don't see her around in person. Once in a while I might see her at a club, but that's it. It is her birthday in a few days, maybe you guys have a good idea for a text that I could send her? Just I just wait until I see her a the club? What should I do?

Thanks for your responses
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Mon Feb 17, 2014 3:32 am ]
Post subject:  Re: I screwed this up, please help
1. Calm the fuck down. There are other women out there. Use this as a learning experience.

2. Stop texting her. Give her a few days.

3. In the future: It's a first date. Just pay. I know a lot of guys on here will not agree with this but so long as you're not taking her to an 11 course meal at the best restaurant possible, suck it up and just pay. It combats shit like this, and any bullshit chivalrous preconceptions a woman may have about whether you're a stand up gentleman or not.

As for this situation, she's probably not interested. That's what it sounds like anyway. If it makes you feel better, it sounds like she was pretty much checked out after the date when she "wasn't sure" if she wanted to see you again.

So we're clear, however, Your text about your cheapness didn't help either.

Want to try again with her? Give her a week then ask again. If she says she's busy or can't make it, find someone else.
Author:  RiRi [ Mon Feb 17, 2014 4:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: I screwed this up, please help
If she means a lot to you, take her ACTIONS (not responding etc.) seriously and leave her alone.

If its ever going to happen, its on her terms. That's your fault for letting it happen.

Start over!
Author:  BITmixit [ Mon Feb 17, 2014 11:13 am ]
Post subject:  Re: I screwed this up, please help
urgh so many guys over think the whole "paying for" bullshit all the time. I generally just let her decide and that gives me a good example of her character. I went out on a date with a girl last week, knew she like a certain cocktail and brought myself and her that cocktail.

Her: oh my god, thank you so much.

half half later or so.

Me: Right time for another round.

Her: Sounds good, this one is on me tho. I owe you one.

From this I obtain that she's chilled out about that sort of thing and also wants to be viewed as an equal not "pussy on pedestal"

Just what I like ;)
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