PUA Forum :: How do I get my PUA mentality back?

You know , a lot of times when guys say they got played , they actually played themselves.

I mean , you can't really fall for a girl that isn't into you , unless you knowingly get into wishful thinking and feed yourself false hope.

As far as getting back on track , as always , go out and meet new people.

Side note:

3 months of talking ? You do realize how deep in the friendzone you were ,right ?

Quote:

Girls lead guys on, guys lead girls on but a decent person is considerate of the expectations of others. She knew he wasn't talking to her for three months to just be a friend.

Quote:

Girls lead guys on, guys lead girls on but a decent person is considerate of the expectations of others. She knew he wasn't talking to her for three months to just be a friend.

People who are being led on are being led on because they're prone to it. Unless she's actively making a conscious effort to toy with you and taking acting classes to perfect her routine , what's going on is fairly obvious.

Also OP says he's been talking to her for 3 months and fell for her during that time. I'm fairly certain he didn't state his intentions at any point and also picked up false trails. People are really good at seeing what they wanna see , instead of what they're being shown.

You can't expect a girl to just stop you mid-convo and say: "Look , I'm not interested in more than friendship" when you as a guy are not treating her as a possible girlfriend.

It's his job to manage his relationships and emotional situations, not hers.

If he's talking to a girl for three months, he should know what's up/have fucked her already.

Yes, her behavior is ok.

Why wouldn't it be?

Did she say, over these three months, "We will be together soon!" ?

If not, she didn't lead him on.

He didn't ask and do the required logistics questions. Plus, three months he's talking to the girl?

The last girl I fucked, I fucked in three hours.

Now, I'm not trying to shit on the OP's skill level - I suck too frequently enough (when drinking, when sad over a girl), but three months is way too long to be talking to a girl without having not gotten it in. It sounds like he assumed the girl was his because she was talking to him a lot, which doesn't mean anything. Texting is cheap.

His problem, not the girls. Sounds like he made no moves on her so as far as she is aware he is fine with the situation. He has essentially lied by omission, liking her but not making it clear.

How someone knows of PUA and STILL ends up in this situation is beyond me, basically the first rule of PUA is escalate and if you do that you will almost never get friendzoned. Allowing yourself to be friendzoned is the definition of epic AFC. Getting blown out, having AA, LMR, all that is forgivable, getting friendzone is NOT if you get friendzoned and you're on this board you are an embarrassment to the entire PUA community.

Author:	ThegameN00b [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 2:42 pm ]
Post subject:	How do I get my PUA mentality back?
I kind of fell for a girl but come to find out after 3 months of talking to her she had a bf and now I know Ive been played. I want things to go back to the way they were. I have been gaming really bad lately do to the fact I had my heart broken and that I was out gamed by a girl. Any motivation to bring me back to my old self or better.

Author:	A Good Person [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 3:28 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
First question you have to answer is why this happened. The reason is that you were to trusting and didnt ass the right questions. Second thing you want to do is raise your self esteem and confidence: get dressed up, do things you're good at, read good books. Third, baby steps get out and met girls just to get your confidence up. Then step back up.

Author:	R.C [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 3:36 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
You know , a lot of times when guys say they got played , they actually played themselves. I mean , you can't really fall for a girl that isn't into you , unless you knowingly get into wishful thinking and feed yourself false hope. As far as getting back on track , as always , go out and meet new people. Side note: 3 months of talking ? You do realize how deep in the friendzone you were ,right ?

Author:	A Good Person [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 4:04 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Quote: You know , a lot of times when guys say they got played , they actually played themselves. I mean , you can't really fall for a girl that isn't into you , unless you knowingly get into wishful thinking and feed yourself false hope. As far as getting back on track , as always , go out and meet new people. Side note: 3 months of talking ? You do realize how deep in the friendzone you were ,right ? Girls lead guys on, guys lead girls on but a decent person is considerate of the expectations of others. She knew he wasn't talking to her for three months to just be a friend.

Author:	R.C [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:22 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Quote: Quote: You know , a lot of times when guys say they got played , they actually played themselves. I mean , you can't really fall for a girl that isn't into you , unless you knowingly get into wishful thinking and feed yourself false hope. As far as getting back on track , as always , go out and meet new people. Side note: 3 months of talking ? You do realize how deep in the friendzone you were ,right ? Girls lead guys on, guys lead girls on but a decent person is considerate of the expectations of others. She knew he wasn't talking to her for three months to just be a friend. People who are being led on are being led on because they're prone to it. Unless she's actively making a conscious effort to toy with you and taking acting classes to perfect her routine , what's going on is fairly obvious. Also OP says he's been talking to her for 3 months and fell for her during that time. I'm fairly certain he didn't state his intentions at any point and also picked up false trails. People are really good at seeing what they wanna see , instead of what they're being shown. You can't expect a girl to just stop you mid-convo and say: "Look , I'm not interested in more than friendship" when you as a guy are not treating her as a possible girlfriend.

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Author:	Xoved [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:32 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
We've all been there, you're not alone. Not enough information though, did you sleep with her? Or was it just 3 months of talking with nothing sexual between you guys?

Author:	A Good Person [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 6:02 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Quote: Quote: Quote: You know , a lot of times when guys say they got played , they actually played themselves. I mean , you can't really fall for a girl that isn't into you , unless you knowingly get into wishful thinking and feed yourself false hope. As far as getting back on track , as always , go out and meet new people. Side note: 3 months of talking ? You do realize how deep in the friendzone you were ,right ? Girls lead guys on, guys lead girls on but a decent person is considerate of the expectations of others. She knew he wasn't talking to her for three months to just be a friend. People who are being led on are being led on because they're prone to it. Unless she's actively making a conscious effort to toy with you and taking acting classes to perfect her routine , what's going on is fairly obvious. Also OP says he's been talking to her for 3 months and fell for her during that time. I'm fairly certain he didn't state his intentions at any point and also picked up false trails. People are really good at seeing what they wanna see , instead of what they're being shown. You can't expect a girl to just stop you mid-convo and say: "Look , I'm not interested in more than friendship" when you as a guy are not treating her as a possible girlfriend. She was negligent. She knew how he felt and she knew she had a boyfriend. Shame on her for not considering others. You are supposed to consider others , but as a man you can overcome that. A lot women are completely oblivious of the effect that their actions has on others.

Author:	Pikeman85 [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 7:11 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
It's his job to manage his relationships and emotional situations, not hers. If he's talking to a girl for three months, he should know what's up/have fucked her already.

Author:	A Good Person [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 7:43 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Quote: It's his job to manage his relationships and emotional situations, not hers. If he's talking to a girl for three months, he should know what's up/have fucked her already. So her behavior is okay?

Author:	Pikeman85 [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 9:16 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Yes, her behavior is ok. Why wouldn't it be? Did she say, over these three months, "We will be together soon!" ? If not, she didn't lead him on. He didn't ask and do the required logistics questions. Plus, three months he's talking to the girl? The last girl I fucked, I fucked in three hours. Now, I'm not trying to shit on the OP's skill level - I suck too frequently enough (when drinking, when sad over a girl), but three months is way too long to be talking to a girl without having not gotten it in. It sounds like he assumed the girl was his because she was talking to him a lot, which doesn't mean anything. Texting is cheap.

Author:	A Good Person [ Thu Oct 31, 2013 10:36 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Quote: Yes, her behavior is ok. Why wouldn't it be? Did she say, over these three months, "We will be together soon!" ? If not, she didn't lead him on. He didn't ask and do the required logistics questions. Plus, three months he's talking to the girl? The last girl I fucked, I fucked in three hours. Now, I'm not trying to shit on the OP's skill level - I suck too frequently enough (when drinking, when sad over a girl), but three months is way too long to be talking to a girl without having not gotten it in. It sounds like he assumed the girl was his because she was talking to him a lot, which doesn't mean anything. Texting is cheap. I disagree people should take responsible for the affect their actions have on others. You take responsibility for yourself to overcome the misacts of others, not to excuse them. Yes. Being more logistical would have helped but this girl deserves a good cussing.

Author:	vicparkguy83 [ Fri Nov 01, 2013 3:38 am ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
His problem, not the girls. Sounds like he made no moves on her so as far as she is aware he is fine with the situation. He has essentially lied by omission, liking her but not making it clear. How someone knows of PUA and STILL ends up in this situation is beyond me, basically the first rule of PUA is escalate and if you do that you will almost never get friendzoned. Allowing yourself to be friendzoned is the definition of epic AFC. Getting blown out, having AA, LMR, all that is forgivable, getting friendzone is NOT if you get friendzoned and you're on this board you are an embarrassment to the entire PUA community.

Author:	A Good Person [ Fri Nov 01, 2013 4:04 am ]
Post subject:	Re: How do I get my PUA mentality back?
Quote: His problem, not the girls. Sounds like he made no moves on her so as far as she is aware he is fine with the situation. He has essentially lied by omission, liking her but not making it clear. How someone knows of PUA and STILL ends up in this situation is beyond me, basically the first rule of PUA is escalate and if you do that you will almost never get friendzoned. Allowing yourself to be friendzoned is the definition of epic AFC. Getting blown out, having AA, LMR, all that is forgivable, getting friendzone is NOT if you get friendzoned and you're on this board you are an embarrassment to the entire PUA community. Without a doubt the girl did him wrong, no shame here at all. Get his mind right and he'll come back better than ever.

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