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HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2respond?
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Author:  Cupid_007 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 6:13 am ]
Post subject:  HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2respond?
I like this girl and i am genuinely seeking advice because I'm not sure on how to proceed.

ok so here's the story:
there's this one girl that i know she's into me because
(A) we've SPAM for over 18 hours already!!
(B) she qualifies herself to me
(C) she laughs at my jokes
(D) we have common interests and great chemistry

but....
she keeps negging me by
(A) She calls me stupid in a serious tone (not flirty) (and it hurts my feelings) or similar things like calling me stupid
(B) Sometimes she texts while I am talking to her instead of paying attention to what i have to say

I have already tried...
(A) calling her out on her behavior. telling her that it's rude for her to call me stupid.
she laughs at it but keeps on doing it on the next SPAM call

HOW DO I RESPOND TO HER NEGS??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????


SIDE NOTE: My goal with this girl is not to meetup because she lives in another state but rather just to make her my friend with benefits (with SPAM sex) and use her as practice
Author:  Cupid_007 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 6:14 am ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
I'm not sure if i should neg her back or not because i'm scared that it's too reactive.
Perhaps i should non-sequeter tease her just super hard as soon she negs me.
Please tell me how to respond. :) THANKS
Author:  Jay (Majik) [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 10:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
sounds like she just likes to use you for the attention you're giving her. 18 hours you've spent talking to this girl on SPAM...? Do you have "WELCOME" tattooed on your forehead? Cause this girl is walking all over you like a door mat. Stop wasting your time.
Author:  Xoved [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 11:51 am ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Want my advice?

She got you wrapped around her little finger, knowing you'll come back to her even if you separate.
Don't act affected by the talk, you're a guy buddy, not some pink unicorn with weak feelings.

In order to win a girl, you have to risk losing her. There's billions of girls out there better than her and she's just acting rude, so play by her rules.

Example: Sign out of SPAM suddenly while talking or getting her aroused and tell her you have to go out. When she calls you stupid, just say "look who's talking, by the way, I have to leave, talk to you soon" and log out.

Trust me this shit works. She'll get mad at first, but then she'll understand that you can't be played easily.
Meanwhile, find other girls to game too.
Author:  BrandonMarshall [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 2:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
grow a pair! I say that in the nicest way possible. Your feelings get hurt when she calls you stupid? She owns you right now.... you've been skyping her for too long brother. I'd just leave the whole situation and find other girls to talk to.... and don't SPAM to these girls on the regular when you meet them. Work on some inner game. You need thick skin... a woman shouldn't be able to call you stupid and have you feeling bad about yourself!
Author:  USteve [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 2:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
I say neg her back dude. Negs are meant to be used on the more arrogant girls. Also maybe the girl is immature and is mean to you as she doesnt want to show her flirting too much, just like girls do in high school.
Like other guys have said though, you've talked to her for too long already. You need to throw caution to the wind and go for it. Nothing bad will happen if you fail, she lives in another state. Just neg her and show sexual intention. Also make sure you dont look desperate.
Author:  Cupid_007 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 4:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
sounds like she just likes to use you for the attention you're giving her. 18 hours you've spent talking to this girl on SPAM...? Do you have "WELCOME" tattooed on your forehead? Cause this girl is walking all over you like a door mat. Stop wasting your time.
--
i very much appreciate your reply but i do not want to just NEXT her and dump her because

(A) we get along very well and i like her (unlike a lot of girls)
(B) she's excellent practice
(C) she likes me
(D) i'd like to have to continue this unofficial open relationship we already have

dumping her is not an option.
my question is how do I respond and turn it around?
Author:  Cupid_007 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 4:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
Want my advice?

She got you wrapped around her little finger, knowing you'll come back to her even if you separate.
Don't act affected by the talk, you're a guy buddy, not some pink unicorn with weak feelings.

In order to win a girl, you have to risk losing her. There's billions of girls out there better than her and she's just acting rude, so play by her rules.

Example: Sign out of SPAM suddenly while talking or getting her aroused and tell her you have to go out. When she calls you stupid, just say "look who's talking, by the way, I have to leave, talk to you soon" and log out.

Trust me this shit works. She'll get mad at first, but then she'll understand that you can't be played easily.
Meanwhile, find other girls to game too.
you're right... i should grow some balls lol

however signing out of SPAM instantly when shes calls me stupid... its waaaay too reactive
(OBVIOUSLY my feelings have been hurt by her. and having her affect my feelings to such a strong degree that I even signoff on SPAM is pretty reactive to her imo).

there's gotta be a better way
Author:  Cupid_007 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 4:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
I say neg her back dude. Negs are meant to be used on the more arrogant girls. Also maybe the girl is immature and is mean to you as she doesnt want to show her flirting too much, just like girls do in high school.
Like other guys have said though, you've talked to her for too long already. You need to throw caution to the wind and go for it. Nothing bad will happen if you fail, she lives in another state. Just neg her and show sexual intention. Also make sure you dont look desperate.
thanks for your advice:) I'm going to try negging her and see what happens...
i just hope negging her back instantly isn't too reactive
ARE YOU SURE NEGGING HER BACK ISN'T TOO REACTIVE???

also i didn't really consider the option of her negging as a way of flirting. this might be the case indeed because i know she likes me.
Author:  pumpington [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 5:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
try to kiss her, see what happens, take it from there
Author:  Ten74 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 5:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
Want my advice?
In order to win a girl, you have to risk losing her. There's billions of girls out there better than her and she's just acting rude, so play by her rules.
^^^^ Spot on. Except for the rules.... Not hers, should be yours.

You more invested than her so you're scared. Fear is not a winning quality.

You MUST force yourself TO BE REACTIVE. NON-reactive is basically dead (or a plant). Sign out, neg back.... I'd just turn off the computer and go for a nice 5 mile run / workout / whatever. It's hard for you to believe this now, but once you shut her out and she comes begging back, you'll feel much better.

HOWEVER.... Maybe you're just being too whiny and pussy about the "stupid". Come on man, have some fun. As said before, good inner game is a must.

Cheers,

T
Author:  Cupid_007 [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 6:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
Quote:
Want my advice?
In order to win a girl, you have to risk losing her. There's billions of girls out there better than her and she's just acting rude, so play by her rules.
^^^^ Spot on. Except for the rules.... Not hers, should be yours.

You more invested than her so you're scared. Fear is not a winning quality.

You MUST force yourself TO BE REACTIVE. NON-reactive is basically dead (or a plant). Sign out, neg back.... I'd just turn off the computer and go for a nice 5 mile run / workout / whatever. It's hard for you to believe this now, but once you shut her out and she comes begging back, you'll feel much better.

HOWEVER.... Maybe you're just being too whiny and pussy about the "stupid". Come on man, have some fun. As said before, good inner game is a must.

Cheers,

T
This is some of the best advice I've heard in a long time.
Being slightly reactive is normal since we are all alive after all. As long as the reactive isn't over done.

If she says stupid like once in a really long time = then I need to stop being a wussy and whiny and not make a big deal out of it. Perhaps tease back or just ignore it.

But if i'm getting consistent negs then i need to
(A) neg back
or
(B) call her out on her behavior.
or
(C) Just sign out (if it gets bad).

Thanks:)

Here's another question for you "How do i respond to the fact that sometimes texts while i'm talking to her?"
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Author:  Xoved [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 6:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
Quote:
Want my advice?
In order to win a girl, you have to risk losing her. There's billions of girls out there better than her and she's just acting rude, so play by her rules.
^^^^ Spot on. Except for the rules.... Not hers, should be yours.

You more invested than her so you're scared. Fear is not a winning quality.

You MUST force yourself TO BE REACTIVE. NON-reactive is basically dead (or a plant). Sign out, neg back.... I'd just turn off the computer and go for a nice 5 mile run / workout / whatever. It's hard for you to believe this now, but once you shut her out and she comes begging back, you'll feel much better.

HOWEVER.... Maybe you're just being too whiny and pussy about the "stupid". Come on man, have some fun. As said before, good inner game is a must.

Cheers,

T
By playing by her rules I did not mean to go along and accept her rules. It's like if she is rude, be rude (play the same way she is playing).
Author:  Xoved [ Sun Oct 13, 2013 6:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
By the way, I have to add something really important.

I'm sorry, but I'd rather take advantage of our anonymous status and tell you with all my heart that you are a super-beta male. If you continue with this path, you WILL develop Oneitis. You WILL start to get jealous. And finally, it's going to be a bad ending.

You do not like her, you are getting used to her because of the lack of sex in your life. This is nothing but the truth.
You can go around telling her not to call you stupid and that you are getting hurt from her behaviors, but that won't get you anywhere and she will eventually move on to another guy really soon.

I FULLY understand the connection between the both of you because I've been there several times.
You treat each other like you are really close. You tell her everything and she does the same. But sadly, you're not going to have a happy ending if you follow this route.

That is just my opinion, and I had to let it out.
Author:  Ten74 [ Mon Oct 14, 2013 5:11 am ]
Post subject:  Re: HELP. i LIKE this girl but she keeps negging me.how2resp
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Want my advice?
In order to win a girl, you have to risk losing her. There's billions of girls out there better than her and she's just acting rude, so play by her rules.
^^^^ Spot on. Except for the rules.... Not hers, should be yours.

You more invested than her so you're scared. Fear is not a winning quality.

You MUST force yourself TO BE REACTIVE. NON-reactive is basically dead (or a plant). Sign out, neg back.... I'd just turn off the computer and go for a nice 5 mile run / workout / whatever. It's hard for you to believe this now, but once you shut her out and she comes begging back, you'll feel much better.

HOWEVER.... Maybe you're just being too whiny and pussy about the "stupid". Come on man, have some fun. As said before, good inner game is a must.

Cheers,

T
By playing by her rules I did not mean to go along and accept her rules. It's like if she is rude, be rude (play the same way she is playing).
Accepted. As long as you're OK with the rules... For example, there's behavior in friends' relationships that I would not put up with on my turf..... But you and I are on the same page I guess in what we mean.

As for your last post, I'd agree with the beginning stages of oneitis. We've all been there at some point. It's just so hard to follow instructions that are counter-intuitive to what you feel is true. But you must force yourself to do it. The 10 other girls, everything. I had oneitis baaadddddd after I broke up with my last GF of 5 years. After my first random ONS I felt like total shit.... For real. But I forced myself to carry on. But here I am after many many other girls have paraded through my apartment happy and enjoying my wait for "Miss Right".

Lets wait for the story to unfold. I don't believe in LDRs myself....
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