PUA Forum
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=169501		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 6:38 pm ]
Post subject:  A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
Seeking an opinion... I have one already but I'm a narrow-minded jerk and would appreciate the input:

I've been seeing this girl for a couple months now - sometimes a few times a week, sometimes one or none. Text frequently... usually phone once or twice a week. We're decent together but she's been known to flake now and again.

She has some family issues happening and blames those. I accept this as the truth, knowing her. I don't think there's another guy or anything like that - but could be wrong, of course.

Recently she's flaked 3 or 4 times in a row with some pretty flimsy reasons and opted to 'stay home' so I basically shut down communication... She's either blissfully unaware flaking is bad, or she's ignoring the fact that she's flaked so frequently and is proceeding as if nothing is wrong... Still messaging, still acting interested.

It's baffling.

I hate flakes and hate making plans and being left hanging with nothing to do cause they happen.

My question is what's an appropriate response here? I was going no-contact, but as I mentioned that's not appearing to be effective. How would you guys handle this? Anything.... creative?
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 6:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
Quote:
Seeking an opinion... I have one already but I'm a narrow-minded jerk and would appreciate the input:

I've been seeing this girl for a couple months now - sometimes a few times a week, sometimes one or none. Text frequently... usually phone once or twice a week. We're decent together but she's been known to flake now and again.

She has some family issues happening and blames those. I accept this as the truth, knowing her. I don't think there's another guy or anything like that - but could be wrong, of course.

Recently she's flaked 3 or 4 times in a row with some pretty flimsy reasons and opted to 'stay home' so I basically shut down communication... She's either blissfully unaware flaking is bad, or she's ignoring the fact that she's flaked so frequently and is proceeding as if nothing is wrong... Still messaging, still acting interested.

It's baffling.

I hate flakes and hate making plans and being left hanging with nothing to do cause they happen.

My question is what's an appropriate response here? I was going no-contact, but as I mentioned that's not appearing to be effective. How would you guys handle this? Anything.... creative?
Flip the script and flake HARD on her ass!
Author:  Brantley [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 8:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
I've had a girl do this to me before. I straight up told her, I didn't like to be flaked on, and if she did it again. I was gone. She did pretty good the next few time. Then flaked again. I just nexted her. She seemed okay with that. Some girls are just fickle or introverted. These girls don't follow the same social guidelines that we normally deal with.
Author:  TheFury [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 8:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
I kind of agree with Brentley here. You are dating a girl for several months, that is more or less a relationship. Tell her you don't appreciate it that she flakes all the time.
Author:  Xoved [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 8:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
Depends if you want something in the long run or no.

If you're just trying to seduce her with no emotions or feelings involved, she's not worth it, next her, you'll find better.

If you want something serious, just give her some space, maybe a week so she misses you and re-initiate with a new personality that does not tolerate flakes. If she continues, well that's her personality, but you might put the "other guy" thing into consideration. Try to investigate the case.
Author:  Brantley [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 9:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
One thing that the community seems to look past is the value of communication. So much of PUA teaching is to avoid real communication for antics and mind trickery. If you are past the second date, chances are you're interested in something more than just sex. At which point you should start being honest with your target. If you're a few months in, there is no reason to be using PUA tactics on a girl. It's at that point that the two of you should be comfortable enough to be open and real with one another.

Be a adult here, one who has self-worth and maturity. Tell her your issue and what you expect from her to repair the issue. Then see if she values you enough to make the change. If she doesn't, you know the respect isn't there and the relationship is doomed. That's when you move on.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Wed Oct 02, 2013 10:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
Thank you all.

So flake HARD on her myself, then have a chat with her. Got it ;)

Great insight Brantley: for some reason with this one I haven't dropped the need to game yet. She's one of those. If it was a defined relationship, sure - I'd agree.
Author:  Jay (Majik) [ Fri Oct 04, 2013 5:44 am ]
Post subject:  Re: A strange case of flaking - seeking opinions
Quote:
Quote:
Seeking an opinion... I have one already but I'm a narrow-minded jerk and would appreciate the input:

I've been seeing this girl for a couple months now - sometimes a few times a week, sometimes one or none. Text frequently... usually phone once or twice a week. We're decent together but she's been known to flake now and again.

She has some family issues happening and blames those. I accept this as the truth, knowing her. I don't think there's another guy or anything like that - but could be wrong, of course.

Recently she's flaked 3 or 4 times in a row with some pretty flimsy reasons and opted to 'stay home' so I basically shut down communication... She's either blissfully unaware flaking is bad, or she's ignoring the fact that she's flaked so frequently and is proceeding as if nothing is wrong... Still messaging, still acting interested.

It's baffling.

I hate flakes and hate making plans and being left hanging with nothing to do cause they happen.

My question is what's an appropriate response here? I was going no-contact, but as I mentioned that's not appearing to be effective. How would you guys handle this? Anything.... creative?
Flip the script and flake HARD on her ass!
I second this.

Represent that you have ABUNDANCE with women vs. scarcity. Continuously trying to hang out with her is needy... Coming from a place of scarcity. Flaking on the girl.... that's some pimp shit :)
Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/