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| A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=168020 |
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| Author: | notepad [ Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:19 pm ] |
| Post subject: | A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
Hi. I have a co-worker which I really like. We've known each other for about 6 months. She's good looking, good hearted, smart, moody (I like that, since I'm very calm and we tend to balance each other out), assertive, and can handle my BS, which is pretty darn rare. She is a rare person, and I'm sure we'd make a great couple. Currently she's a co-worker, we're very friendly at work, and that's it. In less then three months she's leaving, and I'll literally be devastated if I wouldn't have a chance to get closer to her. I'd miss her a LOT (I'm not "in love", but she's just such an awesome person). We have a good, friendly chemistry, but there isn't any tension at all , which is bad. Last Saturday at 4 PM I sent her a text: "hey, I'm gonna grab something to eat, wanna join? One friend's at the military, another's with god [Jewish], and that's pretty much it. Disclosure: it's just friendly, nothing more." I knew that if she'll suspect I'm asking her on a date, she'll freak out because it's kind of weird. I honestly just wanted to hang out with her, just to get closer, not necessarily romantic [for now]. Anyway, her reply: "Hahaha" "I'm not in the area" I replied with an "Okay, I tried. My lazy mom sent me to eat outside -.-". [that's my humor:P] What should I do? The plan I was thinking about was to just get friendlier with her, get a drink together, and if it goes well I believe things will get better naturally. I'm open to advice, but I'm not gonna give up easily so please don't rely stuff like "just ask her to hook you up with a friend of hers". Thanks. |
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| Author: | JTQatar [ Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
So if you guys are friendly at work and talk to each other, why not ask her in person instead of sending her a text? When you´re talking or joking or having a good time at work just ask her "Hey you know what? Lets grab a coffee after work/tomorrow" |
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| Author: | Gunfighter28 [ Sun Sep 01, 2013 8:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
Quote: So if you guys are friendly at work and talk to each other, why not ask her in person instead of sending her a text?
exactly. I am just gonna add from now on do NOT include your little disclosure bit. You said there's no tension by asking her out that's a step in the right direction towards building tension, and getting her thinking about you as possibly more then a friend. Best advice I can give you is stop thinking about it and next time you see her at work ask her in person if she'd like to grab a coffee after work its more personal that way and you're showing confidence. Good luck.
When you´re talking or joking or having a good time at work just ask her "Hey you know what? Lets grab a coffee after work/tomorrow" |
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| Author: | Il-Cavalieri [ Mon Sep 02, 2013 3:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
Definitely ask her in person. Other than that, keep working on generating tension; if you haven't done it already, start getting excuses to touch her, like giving her a soulder massage at the end of the work day or during a break. I know for experience that goes a long way to create tension, allows you to escalate and the sooner you "get phisical" the less wierd it will be. And if you spend a lot of time togather, don't overgame her, because that can be fatal. |
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| Author: | IcingFate [ Mon Sep 02, 2013 4:02 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
You might not want to hear this... but i say this to you in the most respectable and critical way possible. To me its obvious that youre putting her on a pedastool by the way youre describing her and by saying shes a rare person, which is going to affect how you think. If your displaying this to her, even subconsciously in your own body language shes going to pick up on it, which leads to her seeing herself as more valuable and looking down on you etc etc.. The biggest rule in game is not caring, or at least pretending not to care.. Then comes building tension and being more assertive. Along with what the other guys said, you need to ask her in person.. Texting her to hangout makes it so much easier for her to say no or flake.. Theres a little bit more pressure in asking in person, plus it shows balls which women actually like and respect more. Third, it looks like youve got a pretty good handle on how game over texting should basically look like.. But for me personally (and i could be wrong), i didnt like your reply.. In my opinion it showed neediness (especially because of her short answer), and the mom thing could be seen as your mom having a little control over you. I wouldve played it something like "haha okay, your loss!".. This would show that you dont need her company or her value because you have your own value and you were offering to her as a geniune favor (something girls will look for and are very good at spotting). Theyre attracted to men that dont need them, principally, thats how the game works |
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| Author: | IcingFate [ Mon Sep 02, 2013 4:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
Quote: The plan I was thinking about was to just get friendlier with her, get a drink together, and if it goes well I believe things will get better naturally. I'm open to advice, but I'm not gonna give up easily so please don't rely stuff like "just ask her to hook you up with a friend of hers".
You need to work on building tension that comes off in a playful, confident and non needy way.. If you wait too long to get friendly with her theres a good chance you will get friend zoned |
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| Author: | The Alien Elite [ Mon Sep 02, 2013 5:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A co-worker, we're very friendly, and I want her. |
Im not a master by any means, so take this with a grain of salt: You're coming off as beta. You seem very close to being friendzoned...if youre not already. Youve had six months of purely platonic interactions. If you dont escalate, -in person-, you might very well lose your chance. Although, I do sympathize with you...I am going through this with a coworker of my own (Although I had a three-way with her Saturday). Escalate.DO NOT BE OUTCOME INDEPENDENT. I cannot stress that enough. Good luck! |
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