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really confused.
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=162567		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Jason. [ Sun May 19, 2013 2:27 pm ]
Post subject:  really confused.
Yo people, i have a situation with a girl thats pushing me way out of my confort zone. On the one hand its good, this girl is super cute and i want her really bad.
That being said some stuff really confuses me. When i invited her out this week, i did tusday, and she wasnt showing signs that she was interested. She didnt say yes at any moment. At the end i even was like of, tell me if you are down for friday cuz i have other plans if you arent. She answered ok but its only tusday! Bye! (She was leaving before i said it)

So yeah im like fuck, shes not interested. I move on, almost deleted her number.
Didnt tal to her all week, and today sunday she texts me:

You never texted me for us to go out!
:(
(Crying face*)

Wtf should i do? I want her but i feel like im not in control.
I feel like she wants me when shes loosing me and that doesnt seem to be a great fundation to build a relationship.
Also i feel like if i answer im jumping throw her hoops and being controled.

What do you think? Am i overthinking?

Thanks,

Jason.
Author:  Melodical [ Sun May 19, 2013 2:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
" I feel like she wants me when shes loosing me and that doesn't seem to be a great foundation to build a relationship."

This is true to all women :D

Just text her back and say you were busy and couldn't make a date. It makes it look like you're the selector not her and implies you have an active social life then tell her you will let her know when you can meet up. Arrange the date the next day.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Sun May 19, 2013 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
It doesn't seem unreasonable to me that a girl could make a solid plan 3 days out on Tuesday when you were originally talking to her. Particularly if she was into you. Further, nothing prevented her from following up Friday about it. Or Saturday...

Now the question: after that silly "but it's only Tuesday!" - was there any follow up by you? There should have been. She had no idea what the plan was otherwise. Doesn't really sound like you firmed things up. Sounds a bit like a flake, but also sorta sounds like she didn't know the plan! You didn't tell her!

Maybe it's just a girl you really need to take the lead on, but it's a fine line and I sorta get why you didn't... Too much is too needy. Too little and apparently you get a flake on a Friday night :)

If it were me and I was going to try once more... I'd make plans 3 days out again and see if she complies this time, while ignoring Friday's flake. Be firm about the plans though. Meet me at X at X time on X day. It'll be fun.

Good luck.
Author:  Jason. [ Sun May 19, 2013 3:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Thanks for such a good response in so little time. Greately apreciated
Author:  Jason. [ Sun May 19, 2013 3:18 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Quote:
It doesn't seem unreasonable to me that a girl could make a solid plan 3 days out on Tuesday when you were originally talking to her. Particularly if she was into you. Further, nothing prevented her from following up Friday about it. Or Saturday...

Now the question: after that silly "but it's only Tuesday!" - was there any follow up by you? There should have been. She had no idea what the plan was otherwise. Doesn't really sound like you firmed things up. Sounds a bit like a flake, but also sorta sounds like she didn't know the plan! You didn't tell her!

Maybe it's just a girl you really need to take the lead on, but it's a fine line and I sorta get why you didn't... Too much is too needy. Too little and apparently you get a flake on a Friday night :)

If it were me and I was going to try once more... I'd make plans 3 days out again and see if she complies this time, while ignoring Friday's flake. Be firm about the plans though. Meet me at X at X time on X day. It'll be fun.

Good luck.
Well i did tell her what we were going to do. Like i toled her the whole plan ditailed. As you said yes i was scared of being too needy, if i toled her ok text me about friday, and she doesnt, how was i supposed to think she was interested? You know?
Author:  Flex007 [ Sun May 19, 2013 4:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Quote:
" I feel like she wants me when shes loosing me and that doesn't seem to be a great foundation to build a relationship."

This is true to all women :D
Women are idiots, why do we bother lol.
Author:  n2thevoid [ Sun May 19, 2013 5:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Quote:
Quote:
" I feel like she wants me when shes loosing me and that doesn't seem to be a great foundation to build a relationship."

This is true to all women :D
Women are idiots, why do we bother lol.
Because we (and I use 'we' loosely to not include me) are even bigger idiots.

To the OP, no wonder you don't feel as though you're in control you've given up before even making a date with the girl. The MAN thing to do was follow up with a text or phone call arranging the date for Friday but instead you let it fall to the way side and she was thinking "WTF?? Dude is weird I thought he was interested but I guess not...". You almost deleted her number? Seriously, what were you thinking that she'd have jumped on your lap as soon as you had asked her out? Get back to reality kid.

It was Tuesday, so I'd have contacted her the next day via text telling her you've got something cool planned for Friday night, to dress (however required) and at what time you'll pick her up and if that time works for her. Jeezuz Christ you've already eliminated yourself before even following through with things, stop acting so butt hurt over nothing, you're sounding worse than any woman I know.
Author:  Jason. [ Sun May 19, 2013 6:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
First of all chill the fuck down. If i was an expert i wouldnt be asking for help would i?so why the hate?.
Second the backround story is i met her almost a year ago and havent seen her since. She had some issues trusting me cuz i made out with two of her friends before i met her, and allso shes a 20 year old single mom. We were about to o out like 4 month ago but she went back with the father of her child. Now theyve split up so we were about to go out.

So this has been going on for a while and she last week seemed to be makeing up excuses not to arrange it and avoiding the question.


A little update: i sent her a responce saying heyy
Ive been kinda busy,
I thought you were going to text mee

She has seen it and hasnt answered. Note that she sent me the other message at 4 something in the morning so maybe he was drnk.

At this point i just wanna be like hey, i really like you and im tired of playing games with you. I really wanna see you, what are you doing tusday? We should go for a drink

Or something like that.
Author:  n2thevoid [ Sun May 19, 2013 8:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Too much information, bordering emotionally laden "Hey I really like you blah blah blah" its not necessary to go into detail, don't be intense about it. Simply say "hey no worries it was a miscommunication, lets get together this weekend".
Author:  Flex007 [ Sun May 19, 2013 10:42 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
n2thevoid! ignorant assumption! you seem familiar with that!
Author:  Jason. [ Sun May 19, 2013 11:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Its solved i was not as needy as i was going ti be. She was having a bad time so i conforted her. Idk well see what happends ill probably see her this week. Will keep you updated.
Author:  n2thevoid [ Sun May 19, 2013 11:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: really confused.
Quote:
n2thevoid! ignorant assumption! you seem familiar with that!
It's flattering you thought of me enough to follow me from your own thread into this one and even comment. :oops:
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