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Psychology Question About Women with Abandonment Fears
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Author:  PurePlaya [ Mon May 13, 2013 1:54 am ]
Post subject:  Psychology Question About Women with Abandonment Fears

Women who had a father abandon them as a child often times have a fear that the man in their life will do the same thing. As a result, they'll sometimes latch onto the new man they're dating and have a fear of the man leaving them like their dad did. Some of these women will be very hot/cold. They come on very strong, but as soon as the relationship hits an emotional level they freak out and run away.

I've noticed HB 9's and HB 10's with father abandonment issues are the serial daters. They're the ones the sleep with a lot of guys because they can't seem to find a man that they can really trust. The truth is, they've had lots of men in their lives they could have trusted, they just project their insecurities onto EVERY man.

How do you address a woman's fear of abandonment? How can you reassure her that you're not going to leave her? Guys with firsthand experience is appreciated.

Author:  n2thevoid [ Mon May 13, 2013 8:51 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Psychology Question About Women with Abandonment Fears

Often times women with paternal abandonment (aka 'daddy issues') will seek-out a male figure(s) to work-through whatever lack they perceived from their fathers. For example, if they had a cold and overbearing father, a woman may seek a man of a similar nature to which they can find resolution by finding their own solution to the situation they, for whatever reason, could not work through earlier on.

The better question here you should be asking yourself is why would you want to put yourself in an almost untenable situation? Of course she will project a lot onto you, and particularly for the less experienced (unless you're a trained psychoanalyst) it will be over your head in terms of helping her move-through and ultimately resolve her issues. In short, you will only recycle through her experience leaving you burnt out and likely perpetuating her issues. Leave such individuals to trained professionals.

Author:  zmbcm1 [ Mon May 13, 2013 6:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Psychology Question About Women with Abandonment Fears

Quote:
Often times women with paternal abandonment (aka 'daddy issues') will seek-out a male figure(s) to work-through whatever lack they perceived from their fathers. For example, if they had a cold and overbearing father, a woman may seek a man of a similar nature to which they can find resolution by finding their own solution to the situation they, for whatever reason, could not work through earlier on.

The better question here you should be asking yourself is why would you want to put yourself in an almost untenable situation? Of course she will project a lot onto you, and particularly for the less experienced (unless you're a trained psychoanalyst) it will be over your head in terms of helping her move-through and ultimately resolve her issues. In short, you will only recycle through her experience leaving you burnt out and likely perpetuating her issues. Leave such individuals to trained professionals.
I agree. However, credit where credit is due, at least you realize the situation. Don't try to fix a broken person, you'll get burned in the process. If you try to "be there" for a girl with abandonment issues, it'll only drive her further away.

Author:  n2thevoid [ Mon May 13, 2013 7:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Psychology Question About Women with Abandonment Fears

You can't be her counsellor, and even if you could there'd be a gross inequity in the relationship which wouldn't offer anything healthy for either one of you.

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