Quote: Probably more than half of the women I come into contact with between the ages of about 35 and 50 constantly disrespect me and try to give me shit. I'm talking about unattractive, overweight women, usually married with children. I usually come into contact with them because they work at a store, or someplace I happen to be at. Most of the time it will be before I have spoken a single word to them.
How should I deal with this? I need a good way to tell them off. They are people that I would rather not associate with in the first place, so I really don't care about their feelings, but I don't want to look bad in front of other people around.
They usually take a motherly tone and will start talking to me as if I'm 4 years old. Then they'll usually make an age reference comment, such as asking me if I'm in high school or something. Or they'll loudly make a joke at my expense to a coworker. I'm 23 years old, 6'1, 200 lbs amateur bodybuilder.
The best thing would be to give off signals that they shouldn't be messing with me in the first place. So far the only thing I've found that works is to turn around and tie my shoe, which makes my shirt get tucked in behind my handgun, and then they assume I'm a cop and their whole demeanor has magically changed by the time I tug my shirt back over and turn around.
you got to learn to lead the frame, people usually reciprocate and fall into what frame you set if it is stronger
so first lets get into what a frame is, a frame is your perception of reality, now how do you perceive reality in this situation?
to lead the frame, create a reality you would like to exist and be sure of it, to lead you have to go first
Quote: more than half of the women I come into contact with between the ages of about 35 and 50 constantly disrespect me and try to give me shit
Quote: I usually come into contact with them because they work at a store, or someplace I happen to be at. Most of the time it will be before I have spoken a single word to them.
girls typically are fairly submissive and are more prone to falling into other frames easy, rather then projecting a rock solid frame, now maybe you might want to think about your perception there for a second and let that sort of sink in, you perceive these things in this way and girls are more malleable to the frame then guys typically are
now what is your solution to being treated poorly in reaction to your frame? (which by the way they are likely just conforming to your frame)
Quote: I need a good way to tell them off. They are people that I would rather not associate with in the first place, so I really don't care about their feelings, but I don't want to look bad in front of other people around.
you basically do not want to take responsibility to create the frame you desire, instead you are more concerned with their actions then your own and want to react to them and find direction from how they are acting, instead of leading with a new frame that you actually want independent from them
you might have an underlying subconscious need in these situations for approval, it's that neediness and co-dependance you have to train yourself to cut out, be more of a giver then an I NEED TO GET type of person, instead of thinking why are these people not giving you what you want, figure out what they need in order for you to cause a situation conducive to creating value for everyone (a win/win situation, rather then a win/lose situation)
Quote: The best thing would be to give off signals that they shouldn't be messing with me in the first place. So far the only thing I've found that works is to turn around and tie my shoe, which makes my shirt get tucked in behind my handgun, and then they assume I'm a cop and their whole demeanor has magically changed by the time I tug my shirt back over and turn around.
you are basically being anti-social and defensive with being socially abrasive as your solution to get respect from others, if you would like to create more social opportunities for yourself and have women start helping you and your penis instead of cock blocking you, especially in an environment where you have to see them on a regular basis, making friends will do you more good then making enemies, and as stated before, people tend to reciprocate and react rather then remain independent (it is why leaders are rare), the quickest way to get someone's respect is to show them respect, often saying this to reactive people results in a typical reactive response ''ya well you gotta earn my respect to get it'' or ''I'm not bitching up for some stuck up asshole'' etc., think about those statements for a second, what do you think would change that persons tune in that situation? the person they hate and don't want to show respect to, what would that person have to do to fulfill their needs and gain their respect? (give you a hint, if the rapport is not completely fucked, likely be the first to show signs of respect)
just realize how you feel about others and feel while around others is typically how they are going to start to feel about and around you, if you feel there is rapport with someone and you like them and you conform to that frame with that reality very strongly enforced in your mind, chances are eventually they will conform to that frame also and you will have rapport, it works the same in the opposite way
with that being said just be careful not to be desperate to get something, people in general make decisions based on the concept of value, prospect theory goes into detail a little more about it
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prospect_theory
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Value_%28marketing%29
after reading those posts you can see why projecting a frame of you wanting something from someone is a turn off, it's like when a homeless guy approaches you and you get that feeling he is going to ask you for some money or a smoke before he even does anything, it's just the needy frame he is projecting, trying to take rather then give, trying to fulfill his needs and create a win/lose situation, rather then bringing value for you that suites your needs
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Just remain strong/relax eye contact, BECAUSE YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T CARE WHAT THEY THINK, and laugh their jokes, and spin something back to them, don't be boring and drop the energy. Ignore negative comments or roll with them (sarcastically). This is what I do, and they love it. Most older women, that used to be good looking, still have a fantasy of their old beauty being revived/recognized. Also once they like you, the more likely people will tend to follow (the audience that you speak of). This is just my reference experience from delivering Sandwiches for Jimmy Johns and having to deal with older women that tend to be crabby. Don't be afraid to be flirty! Good luck! 