After browsing the boards all last night for advice, I decided to head out to the local Coyote Ugly right before close to see if there were any sloppy, blacked out ladies who might be receptive.

Oh, fyi, I am/was a virgin, so I don't have much technique except from what I learned from taking detailed notes on Tori Black vids.

Anyway, I used WATERGUY100's water bottle technique, and it really worked. I insisted she could use the dryer at my mom's house to dry up her sopping wet shirt, so off we went.

She was kind of tired while waiting for the shirt to dry, so I told her should rest in my bed while I waited and played WoW on my computer. Things were going pretty well so far. While she was relaxing, I walked over and grabbed her breast with my hand and grunted at her. I think she was awake and got the hint. Then we had sex. It lasted almost about 2 minutes. I'm assuming that is pretty standard for a virgin? In porn, they always seem to last about that much time anyway in the short vid clips I watch on youporn.

Anyway, now I have this burning sensation down there. I was thinking this would be a great excuse to have to call her. What should I say? I'd love to see her again.

In situations like this I've found it best - as in ALL of life's situations - to assert dominance. Here, she clearly gave you something STD related. Your dick is infected, and she has the upper hand. You need to take it back and assert dominance over the situation. Thus, when you call her up (thereby establishing day 2 contact, I read this was good) to inquire about the "burning", she'll likely apologize for having an STD and not telling you.

At this point, tell her its OK because you were hiding something as well - you have HIV. Of course, you don't, but she doesn't know that. Dominance asserted, and the upper hand is yours once again.

I was BORN and BRED for SARGING and POUNDING