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how to deal with (potentially) shy HB9?
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=158695		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  mmmkay [ Mon Mar 18, 2013 1:41 am ]
Post subject:  how to deal with (potentially) shy HB9?
I'm still very very new at this; been in and out of the PUA community, but here's the skinny. HB 8/9 (maybe even a 10 in a casual/girl-next-door kind of way) sits next to me for about 10 weeks in class. There are better/worse seats, but she still sits next to me. This could be something, but probably not.

She's very awkward, always arriving right on the dot or leaving right as class ends. I've attempted to make conversation with her once (maybe about 3 weeks in): "Hey did we get our exams back?" etc, type of banter. She gave me a polite answer but never made eye contact so it was weird for me to transition to anything else. If I had to be honest, I would've maybe had 4 openings but instead only talked to her twice.

(Side note: this is so fucking ridiculous. What normal person sits next to another normal person twice a week for 10 weeks and never even smiles or makes room for a "hello" moment? Never experienced this in any class or any business setting. Ever.)

Anyway, this week was the last week of school (week 10), so I decided to give it one more shot. At the end of class, I ask her for some notes. She obliges and asks me for my email (my goal was to get her number, but she had a pen handy and I didn't want to be too forceful). She sends me the notes with a polite message Thursday at 1am. Before I get her email, we don't even know each others names.

I email her back 24 hours later thanking her for the notes and asking if she'd like to study for the final exam (at this point, I just want to try and have a normal conversation and see what she's really like -- I don't even know if she's fun to be around). No response for about 3 days. I think I probably fucked up because I didn't try to talk to her more often and built some comfort, but her shyness/social awkwardness made it difficult. Should I talk to her before/after the final exam, asking her out? Should I email her again? Are there any obvious ways I fucked up? How do you deal with girls that seem socially awkward but are relatively attractive?

I get hit on by HB 5-7s on a fairly regular basis and it's very weird that one of the rare times I initiate, things don't go anywhere (and I get straight-up ignored). I'm trying to stay away from girls and just work on my studies but I couldn't resist here. I think I just need someone to tell me to forget about her.
Author:  Finesse! [ Mon Mar 18, 2013 2:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Just want to know how I completely fucked this up
She could be very quiet and shy or doesn't talk much during class as she is very intent on learning or even has a boyfriend. Asking her to study definitely was way too soon, if she is shy which is what I'm getting here then a lot more comfort would have been required. Forget about her and move away from her in class, at the moment you may be seen as 'that nice quiet guy in class that doesn't bother me while I learn'. Take this away from her and she will recognize you, then it's in her ball park to make a move.
Author:  mmmkay [ Mon Mar 18, 2013 2:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Just want to know how I completely fucked this up
Quote:
She could be very quiet and shy or doesn't talk much during class as she is very intent on learning or even has a boyfriend. Asking her to study definitely was way too soon, if she is shy which is what I'm getting here then a lot more comfort would have been required. Forget about her and move away from her in class, at the moment you may be seen as 'that nice quiet guy in class that doesn't bother me while I learn'. Take this away from her and she will recognize you, then it's in her ball park to make a move.
Thanks for the reply. However, as I said, there's only the final exam left and this was my "hail Mary" play. It was the only thing left really so I don't think I'll have any way other chance to build anything. Oh well. Live and let live, as they say.

I will definitely NOT be sitting next to her during the final exam though. Plus, I just find it straight-up rude not to reply to a nicely-written and pretty normal email from a dude in your class (I would even reply if the most repulsive girl I'd have zero interest in would email me) -- so maybe her personality sucks anyway. Thanks again! Looks like my instinct was correct :P
Author:  mmmkay [ Mon Mar 18, 2013 4:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: how to deal with (potentially) shy HB9?
Hah, she just replied actually: "No problem. Thanks -- it would be helpful, certainly, but I'm unfortunately really strapped for time this week, and I won't be able to do more than read/write all I can for each class. Good luck!" Not sure what to make of it, but it seems like a pretty genuine rejection. Oh well, c'est la vie.

Should I reply after the exam (about 1 week) with some DHV and another call to action (a real date this time) or just forget it?
Author:  Finesse! [ Mon Mar 18, 2013 8:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: how to deal with (potentially) shy HB9?
Cut your losses bro, game others ;)
Author:  mmmkay [ Tue Mar 19, 2013 6:18 am ]
Post subject:  Re: how to deal with (potentially) shy HB9?
After running the situation by a couple of friends (male as well as female), I'm getting conflicting comments. Chicks are telling me to send another (more forward) message, something like: "Yeah, I can relate; this week's been busy. Not only do I have to worry about finals, but I've been constantly driving between XXX and YYY on business (at least the scenery is nice). Anyway, if you ever want to grab a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, hook me up with your number."

And all the guys are telling me to forget it and just next her.

Haha, I've never had a polarizing situation like this before. Obviously, my gut tells me to forget it (and frankly I don't care about this chick that much anyway) but I keep wondering if there's a way to turn semi-rejection + DHV into anything. From what I've read, I will definitely need some sort of DHV to build comfort.
Author:  Finesse! [ Tue Mar 19, 2013 11:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: how to deal with (potentially) shy HB9?
I have a new rule, always ensure you value the girl less than she values you. Does she value you? I'd go direct (which it seems like doesn't work with her right now and it would take a lot of effort to build comfort) or forget her, I'd go with your gut.. I've always found it to be accurate.
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