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Boyfriend Confidence
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Author:  Alkaline [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 4:08 am ]
Post subject:  Boyfriend Confidence

It's strange. When I'm in a relationship-that I'm sexually active in-I seem to be much more confident around other women. I seem to have them hunting me down, even when I don't want them to (they are completely unaware of my relationship). And while I am unaware of the no-surveys rule I'm curious about you guys, just for the sake of education and curiosity.

Author:  RiRi [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 5:15 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Boyfriend Confidence

I think it comes down to 2 things:

- You exude a confidence when you are with somebody because...you aren't looking for somebody. One aspect of being confident is not being needy, because you already have what you need (or at least thats how you come across).
- If the girl knows (or assumes) that you have a significant other, it's actually "safer" to interact with you because the assumption is that you won't have ulterior motives (although can't always say the same for her). Its kind of like fighting a snake with no fangs or venom.

I knew a guy that told people at school that he was dating a girl from another school (if you're still in school), which created this mystery about who she was, but it also created the mystery of him being taken. Needless to say, he got what he wanted, attention from girls. Unfortunately, he got greedy and people were starting rumors she didn't exist, a la Manti Te'o. I still think that is one of the best "experiments" I've seen that produced instant results, but not without that hilarious catch. It's still the correct mindset though!

have fun man

Author:  Alkaline [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 5:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Boyfriend Confidence

I didn't want to respond to my own question but you stated my general idea explaining why guys (and surely girls) feel this way. When you have something to fall back on, an insurance of some kind, you're more likely to take risks-and getting rejected by other women isn't a wound to your ego. This is all because you have something to fall back on. IE you wouldn't take or would be much less likely to take a road trip to an area you are unfamiliar driving in without auto insurance. With insurance you eliminate risk-thus eliminating insecurity/worry and creating confidence.

Author:  pumpington [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 8:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Boyfriend Confidence

perhaps you get needy when you are single

Author:  Alkaline [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 7:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Boyfriend Confidence

No, I think guys just need to perform some newbie missions to evolve an immunity to insecurity. I think almost everyone doubts themselves after ending an LTR, especially the week or so afterwards-I'm past that point now but I wasn't 2-3 weeks ago. Ever since I started this PUA stuff I've been approached by girls on their own-I don't even really have to 'game' those ones. If anything has changed about me from the experience its my confidence around the opposite sex. That might be the most important-and maybe the only real tactic, trick, whatever taught in these seduction guides. The rest, just being a way to show it.

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