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Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
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Author:  fthat [ Fri Feb 15, 2013 12:31 am ]
Post subject:  Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
So I have been speaking to this girl for the past few weeks via text/FB, i got onto her through a friend who said she was a little interested.

We decided to meet for a date, 1 or 2 days ago we grabbed coffee near her place, we talked a bit of **** and after coffee at the train station i kissed her, we made out for a while and then i had my arm around her, she had her hand on my leg. On the train we were standing up but i had my arm around her and her hand was on mine and then we kissed goodbye. I thought everything went well and we were smiling alot.

But i heard she told her best friend shes not that interested, her best friend is seeing my best friend and he relayed that to me.

It was 2 days ago that i saw her, We've spoken once since where i asked her if she enjoyed spending time with me. She said she did.

I can tell via another few texts that since the meeting shes definitely been less keen but still really nice, I'm not really sure what I did wrong. This was my first proper date.

So I've got 3 questions
How should i play it with this girl if i want to see her again, text or call?, i feel like I've definitely still got a chance.
I came from a friends house and i had been drinking before i saw her so i was a little tipsy when we met for coffee, should i tell her that?
Also if it seems like i cannot salvage anything should i ask her what i did wrong or what she didn't like so I know for future reference?

this is the girl, i am not the guy in the photo. Also, she is 16 and I am 18, does our young ages change the game at all? Also I'd prefer if no one judged because I'm so young and just answered the question.

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Author:  R.C [ Fri Feb 15, 2013 9:22 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Quote:
But i heard she told her best friend shes not that interested, her best friend is seeing my best friend and he relayed that to me.
That brings up memories. I've been in that exact spot. I never really found out if that was true , I just didn't care. I was interested in her so I was willing to go for what I wanted.
Quote:
How should i play it with this girl if i want to see her again, text or call?, i feel like I've definitely still got a chance.
Call. Even if she is losing interest , texts are the perfect way to flake. ("Oh..sorry,I didn't see it until 10 days later"). Just call.
Quote:
I came from a friends house and i had been drinking before i saw her so i was a little tipsy when we met for coffee, should i tell her that?
Irrelevant. Plus to some it's a DLV.
Quote:
Also if it seems like i cannot salvage anything should i ask her what i did wrong or what she didn't like so I know for future reference?
You can but there's pretty much nothing you'll gain out of it. What she didn't like is quite irrelevant because what she didn't like , some other girl will love. She's also probably going to go easy on you and be nice , not telling you what really bothered her. She's not gonna be 100% honest about it.


You're letting what your friend told you get to you. Act like she's madly in love with you. Don't hold back and you will win her. If you keep obsessing on "omg friend said she's not that into me" you're on your way to failing.
Quote:
his is the girl, i am not the guy in the photo. Also, she is 16 and I am 18, does our young ages change the game at all? Also I'd prefer if no one judged because I'm so young and just answered the question.
Trust me on this one. Do whatever you want , but trust me. There is a HUGE mindset difference between 16yo and 18yo. I strongly suggest you go for girls your age. 17 at minimum.
Author:  SantasLittleHelper [ Fri Feb 15, 2013 11:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Quote:
Quote:
his is the girl, i am not the guy in the photo. Also, she is 16 and I am 18, does our young ages change the game at all? Also I'd prefer if no one judged because I'm so young and just answered the question.
Trust me on this one. Do whatever you want , but trust me. There is a HUGE mindset difference between 16yo and 18yo. I strongly suggest you go for girls your age. 17 at minimum.
Sorry for hijacking this thread a little, but why do you think it's a huge mindset differance? I always thought that 15-18, maybe 19 the mindset is pretty much the same(highschool mindset basically).
Author:  puaninja [ Fri Feb 15, 2013 1:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Call. But I also don't think you should be posting pics of underage girls on here, for several different reasons.
Author:  ian_mezza [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 1:43 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Phone her and tell tell her what you think about her.
Author:  Newb4lyfe [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 2:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Quote:

So I've got 3 questions
How should i play it with this girl if i want to see her again, text or call?, i feel like I've definitely still got a chance.
I came from a friends house and i had been drinking before i saw her so i was a little tipsy when we met for coffee, should i tell her that?
Also if it seems like i cannot salvage anything should i ask her what i did wrong or what she didn't like so I know for future reference?

this is the girl, i am not the guy in the photo. Also, she is 16 and I am 18, does our young ages change the game at all? Also I'd prefer if no one judged because I'm so young and just answered the question.

No one should judge you it's a friendly forum, I'm 19 myself.

First off something that kind of bugged me (not a big deal) but, you asked if she enjoyed spending time with you. The thing that bugs me with this is that you are kind of seeking her approval, as if asking if you are good enough for her, it kind of counter-acts DHV.

Do not tell her you were drinking before you were hanging out with her, this could come across as a huge turn-off, kind of like you are trying to prove yourself if you did anything she didn't like. It's like trying to say you weren't yourself and that you could be better, which again would counter-act with DHV. Instead it's better to reinforce who you were, and that you're happy to be yourself, but not in a showing off way.

If you feel like everything is lost, and she's pretty much stale, and wouldn't even be available for you in the future, then yes ask her what you did wrong, but really, if you think you might see her again and she was some what attracted to you, you could still have a chance a while in the future, especially if you practice more with women in the time being.
Author:  helloimalady [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 3:01 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Quote:

So I've got 3 questions
How should i play it with this girl if i want to see her again, text or call?, i feel like I've definitely still got a chance.
I came from a friends house and i had been drinking before i saw her so i was a little tipsy when we met for coffee, should i tell her that?
Also if it seems like i cannot salvage anything should i ask her what i did wrong or what she didn't like so I know for future reference?

.
Here's my womanly advice.
first of all, great job because she is a very beautiful girl. you should be pleased with yourself for even going out with her.
as for your questions
i think that you cannot ignore the fact that this girl has explicitly said she is not interested. This should be a clear sign that it will be an uphill battle, if not a losing one.
I think you should either cut your losses or at lesat distance yourself considerably. And keep in mind that whatever you are asking to do now is just game playing, and manipulating her interest - not that it is bad - but it's manufactured, and does not derive from a real interest on her part. she will become interested but it's not the same thing as true attraction.
I'm a little not clear why you are so confident you still have a chance, if she has said, explicitly, under no uncertain terms that she is not interested. girls don't state things like that unless it's true. If she was on the fence, it'd be like, "i am not sure how i feel" or "he's nice, but I don't know..." something wishy washy like that. but if she did say that, and i misread the question, by all means...

there is no reason to tell her you were tipsy. why do you think you should tell her that?

so if you decide to move on, I don't think you should ask her what you did wrong. She likely will not give you a real answer - and it might not have anything to do with you - it could be something like you remind her of an ex or maybe you look like a guy who smelled bad in her art class.. it could be something as ridiculous as that! so it's not worth it. Just take it on the chin, keep your head up and feel pleased with how great you did with her despite her low interest level

and i hope nothing i am saying is coming across mean. it is not meant to. I truly think you did awesomely and this girl is just a bimbo. :)
Author:  Newb4lyfe [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 4:44 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Quote:
Quote:

So I've got 3 questions
How should i play it with this girl if i want to see her again, text or call?, i feel like I've definitely still got a chance.
I came from a friends house and i had been drinking before i saw her so i was a little tipsy when we met for coffee, should i tell her that?
Also if it seems like i cannot salvage anything should i ask her what i did wrong or what she didn't like so I know for future reference?

.
I think you should either cut your losses or at lesat distance yourself considerably. And keep in mind that whatever you are asking to do now is just game playing, and manipulating her interest - not that it is bad - but it's manufactured, and does not derive from a real interest on her part. she will become interested but it's not the same thing as true attraction.
I'm a little not clear why you are so confident you still have a chance, if she has said, explicitly, under no uncertain terms that she is not interested. girls don't state things like that unless it's true. If she was on the fence, it'd be like, "i am not sure how i feel" or "he's nice, but I don't know..." something wishy washy like that. but if she did say that, and i misread the question, by all means...

and i hope nothing i am saying is coming across mean. it is not meant to. I truly think you did awesomely and this girl is just a bimbo. :)
I kind of disagree with this, a lot of girls, especially younger do not know what they want in a guy yet. And feelings change a lot. You have to consider I've heard girls say "ew him? um no thanks" and then have sex with them a week later. Interest and attraction are borderline, if you are interested in someone, you are probably also attracted to them. I mean you build interest while building attraction.

He should be confident at all times. Never tell someone they shouldn't be confident, maybe he got misinformation? I mean really, Confidence is one of the keys of what keeps PUA separate from AFC's. If anything maybe he should throw it all out on one chance, and if it doesn't work yeah he should move on, but never lose confidence.
Author:  helloimalady [ Tue Feb 19, 2013 1:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
Quote:

I kind of disagree with this, a lot of girls, especially younger do not know what they want in a guy yet. And feelings change a lot. You have to consider I've heard girls say "ew him? um no thanks" and then have sex with them a week later. Interest and attraction are borderline, if you are interested in someone, you are probably also attracted to them. I mean you build interest while building attraction.

He should be confident at all times. Never tell someone they shouldn't be confident, maybe he got misinformation? I mean really, Confidence is one of the keys of what keeps PUA separate from AFC's. If anything maybe he should throw it all out on one chance, and if it doesn't work yeah he should move on, but never lose confidence.
Fair enough - that is true about girls like thatI'm not one of them, so I guess I forget there certainly are girls who do that. But i guess my thought process would be - if a girl is that callous to say that, it seems disrespectful to me. I'd move on from someone who would say "ew" about me because I have self-respect. But if he still wants to go for it, yes her mind can be changed.

i totally agree to always have confidence. What i was actually saying was that he was confident about how she felt, in other words, he was so sure about it. I don't think that's the same kind of confidence we're talking about here. I meant how could you be so SURE she likes you. I wasn't trying to suggest he shouldnt be a confident person, because I think he should be! Anyways, I hope this makes more sense. I am complete agreement for him to be confident, and as said above if he really likes her, absolutely go after her, despite what she saying she didn't like him.

Please answer my question? thanks!
Author:  James.P_1 [ Wed Feb 20, 2013 6:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Went on a date, but i need advice(picture of girl)
I think you sould try a complete freeze-out (have no contact with her for a while) and then when you meet up the next time (since you`s have mutual friends) bring along another girl as a friend but give the impression she is a friend with benefits without saying it. You can do this through kino and telling stories that only involve the two of you but never finish the story and leave the ending a mystery.

So basically show the girl your trying to get that you have an abundance of women, Adam Lyons talkes about it check it out.
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