| PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| Help, I think I'm being played?! https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=154309 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | Berenjena [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Help, I think I'm being played?! |
I'm 18, this girl is 17. So I met this girl from School throughout Facebook like 7 months ago (She contacted me first). I never ever saw her in school because I left after my Senior year and she was a sophomore. She was obviously the first one interested as she went out of her way to add me on facebook and send me a first message...etc. For the first 3 months we were only texting/talking on the phone as I wasn't really interested in meeting up with her, and she was the one showing all the interest and I just didn't feel attracted enough to meet up with her. Well one night we started having phone sex and everything was progressing pretty good. Well after the Phone sex night, she suddenly started ignoring my texts, calls, and was making up excuses not to talk to me, she she literally leaved when we starting to get closer. After being mad and confused have what happened, I eventually got over her... So as you may have guess it a month or two after, she text me again trying to suddenly meet up. She said she was around my neighborhood in a friends house and want it to see me. I was at my house and still bitter, I told her I was "busy" and out of the house...Well after that she was on me again... I decided to meet at my house like 2 weeks after and we made out, had fun, laugh, rub on her...we pretty much had sex with clothes on. At this point I started to like this girl a lot!. One of my friends that was in the same classroom as she was.. over heard her bragging to her friends about me.. which obviously made me feel like a boss. The first 5 months Iwanted no part of a relationship at all, and she was the only trying to move on. Well lately I been trying to become a little more serious and she becomes really cold or a acts like a b*tch when I want get a little serious, she even claimed she "doesn't like relationships" ... lately I've been acting a little needy and she seems the one in control. I need to regain it back! Should I just ignored her like the other time she came running back? Extra content: All the bitchy attitude and coldness is throughout the phone or text. In person this girl gets completely hypnotize by me. kissing her, grabbing her, talking to her...etc is a piece of cake. that's why I'm so confused. If I act distant... there she is on my d*ck, sweet...planning places to meet up etc... If treat her a little more serious with respect she becomes a certified b*tch and not sweet at all, rather cold. |
|
| Author: | simplesneaks [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
ive been threw this exact situation i know what your going threw. heres my advice. ok theres 2 scenarios that might be happening in this situation. 1st shes either committed to some other guy you dont know about and shes eventually going to have a relationship with him, but your sparking her interest a bit and shes being naughty and txting you secretly but shes not getting too involved with you, hence the on and off messages as shes scared she might develop feelings for you. 2nd shes manipulating you and playing you, which is also a great. this situation you have to ride it out for a long long time, maybe 6 - 8 months. These girls are confident and fun to game with. basically the goal is not to put all your hopes in her as she will break your heart, girls have super senses and love taking advantage of things ! just give her a couple of txt every 2 - 3 months. then completely ignore her for 3 months and continue to do this until she is crazy obsessed with you. like they say "they want what they cant have". i used this 2 -3 month txt/ignoring method and it worked for me. It will also work if your being played as she will see your an alpha and your not desperate or annoyed with the fact shes STILL talking to you and havent agreed on a date yet, she will see you of high value. This situation wont be an over night fix. you will need to wait a long time, if shes an 8,9 or 10 definately ride it out as the sex will be passionate and she will most like be extremely kinky in bed. good luck ! |
|
| Author: | enesta [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:40 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
There are so many things wrong here. I'm so glad I'm not a teenager any more. She wants to have fun and settling down with you is not fun. It was clear from the start when she ignored you after phone sex - she wants to get her fill and do her own thing after that. I'd ask myself if I seriously wanted to be with this girl. It sounds like a lot of anxiety and frustration not worth having on your end. If you're still set on it, though, then I'd simply start pulling away from her. Be less available and start talking to different girls. Once she sees that you don't need and or want her like you did, she'll probably come at you stronger. If not, then you've moved on and you still win. |
|
| Author: | Berenjena [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
guys that sounds like a great advice! I'm tired of taking her too serious and coming off as needy. Should I just give her a really long break and in the process keep meeting new girls and look for something better? and if she maybe has a secret boy then why does she sometimes invite me to her house to meet some of her family members? But at the same time she doesn't want a relationship... some girls are extremely confusing. I think she really really likes me and distants herself to not fall for me. she has been giving me an awful lot of stress lately. I seriously just want to know where I stand with her. I'm really good at moving on. as soon as she feels I'm really out... she starts crawling back. EDIT: She's a virgin, she knows I'm not. If that has something to do with anything |
|
| Author: | enesta [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:50 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
Taking a break comes off just as needy. Turn the tables on her - get your fill with her, have your sexual fun and then go talk to other girls. It's your mindset that needs to change, she'll pick up on that. Stop worrying about how she feels and what guys she may be talking to. Just do your own thing, dwelling on her is really the only issue here. Now if you want to start a healthy relationship that'll blossom, then you need to sit down and have a serious discussion with her - at which point you'll realize it's time to move on probably. But hey, you're young, have fun. |
|
| Author: | Berenjena [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
Quote: Taking a break comes off just as needy. Turn the tables on her - get your fill with her, have your sexual fun and then go talk to other girls. It's your mindset that needs to change, she'll pick up on that. Stop worrying about how she feels and what guys she may be talking to. Just do your own thing, dwelling on her is really the only issue here.
So If I ignored her and start worrying about myself, that would seem needy? I was thought it would be the opposite (serious question)Now if you want to start a healthy relationship that'll blossom, then you need to sit down and have a serious discussion with her - at which point you'll realize it's time to move on probably. But hey, you're young, have fun. And I agree my mindset needs to start changing.. I need more of a "f*ck it" attitude. I seriously hate when I get all sentimental... it's just not my personality. I'm a guy that sees himself being married around the age of 28-35 when I making a good salary...etc which is why I'm a little confused as of why I'm trying to set myself down so young right... |
|
| Author: | enesta [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
Ignoring her is immature and obvious. You can focus on yourself without completely cutting communication with her. It shouldn't even be an issue, she shouldn't phase you - at least that's what you want to communicate. If you intentionally ignore her it lets her know that you care, a lot. So, instead, just be busier. Reply less often, take longer to get back to her, be unavailable more often, when you do talk make sure you've been busy with other people so that you can bring up the fun things you've been doing without her. Realistically if you're living a full, fun and busy life - this will be second nature. She'll pickup on this and want in on your world. If she's lucky, you'll let her in. |
|
| Author: | Berenjena [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
Quote: Ignoring her is immature and obvious. You can focus on yourself without completely cutting communication with her. It shouldn't even be an issue, she shouldn't phase you - at least that's what you want to communicate. If you intentionally ignore her it lets her know that you care, a lot.
I'm really feeling this and it makes all the sense in the world. I won't ignored her... but I should not contact her first? and make her earn my full attention like before... So, instead, just be busier. Reply less often, take longer to get back to her, be unavailable more often, when you do talk make sure you've been busy with other people so that you can bring up the fun things you've been doing without her. Realistically if you're living a full, fun and busy life - this will be second nature. She'll pickup on this and want in on your world. If she's lucky, you'll let her in. Plus you're right in your other post. I'm thinking too much about her feelings, that's why my flirting with other girls has gone down... and yet we have not discussed no exclusivity rights or anything.. she's obviously not giving a F*ck about mine right now. |
|
| Author: | enesta [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:19 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
Details like when you should contact her and with what, shouldn't be an issue if you frame it in the context of your new mindset. Imagine a busy guy who has a lot of girls to chat with, lots of stuff to do and places to be. Do you really think he's concerned with whether or not he should contact a girl he had a thing with first, or not? If you have something worth saying to her, then say it. If not, go about your life. So again, just reframe your decisions in the context of a fun, care-free guy with lots of things going on in his life. Someone who has girls to choose from. Once you can do that, you won't have to fret over each individual situation, the answer will be there. |
|
| Author: | Berenjena [ Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:04 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
I was texting her right now and asked her "You think we'll ever be anything more than this?" She said "No I don't". Do I ignored this text and just go my way or should I have some kind of reaction and write her back and then go my way? erase her number and from my facebook friend list or this makes me look bitter? It's hard to believe and but it's what it is. |
|
| Author: | enesta [ Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
See, it was that easy. Now you can say fuck it, move on. You're really, really young and there are a lot of really amazing, gorgeous women out there for you. Take what you've learned in this relationship and grow from it. It only gets much much better from here my friend. As for her and her number, no don't delete it. Obviously you liked something about her or you wouldn't have wasted your time. If mentally that's what you need to do in order to move on, go ahead. But a mature, confident, fun guy with the world at his feet and all the options in the world - that guy wouldn't even give her the pleasure of deletion. Move on with your life and put her out of your mind. |
|
| Author: | Berenjena [ Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:21 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
Quote: See, it was that easy.
Thanks man, this has really help me grown up a lot! I put her out my mind pretty fast the other time she came up with something similar... I'm going to do the same now! Should I send her some kind of good bye reply or ignored her?
Now you can say fuck it, move on. You're really, really young and there are a lot of really amazing, gorgeous women out there for you. Take what you've learned in this relationship and grow from it. It only gets much much better from here my friend. As for her and her number, no don't delete it. Obviously you liked something about her or you wouldn't have wasted your time. If mentally that's what you need to do in order to move on, go ahead. But a mature, confident, fun guy with the world at his feet and all the options in the world - that guy wouldn't even give her the pleasure of deletion. Move on with your life and put her out of your mind. |
|
| Author: | enesta [ Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:57 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Help, I think I'm being played?! |
You still haven't gotten the point, though! Again, reframe your question in the context of the type of person you want to be. Seriously analyze what that action says - not about her, but about you. It says that you're dependent on the outcome of how she views this relationship and interaction. What will that 'goodbye' do for you? Stop thinking about her, think about the next step. I can't emphasize this enough. Think about what you ultimately want and keep an unwavering focus on that, everything else will fall into place. If I had to guess, you don't want to settle down and start a family with this girl. So in the context of that, this will fall by the wayside and you can start getting to business. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|