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| First online dating profile critique needed https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=153940 |
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| Author: | blazer206 [ Wed Jan 02, 2013 12:12 am ] |
| Post subject: | First online dating profile critique needed |
Hello my fellow Venusian artists! I am pretty new to the PUA scene. I threw this online profile together and need any and all good points/bad points, is it the on the right track, etc... Don't be afraid to be a harsh critic! Pictures 2 pictures of me with attractive women, 1 skydiving, 1 singing karaoke, and 1 of me smiling in my military uniform. Interests Bacon, Monkeys with top hats, fat people in very small cars, is it to early to admit im a boob man, the feeling of brand new socks, and battles of wits. Story Saddle up ****es this is where it gets fun. Are you looking for a sweet and honest guy who will bow to your will!? Well you're in luck because there are THOUSANDS of those chumps on this site! If are you looking for the most kick ass guy friend you've ever known then keep your beautiful eyeballs on my profile. Look at that, you are already doing what I tell you to do, this just might work out. Ok, I know you are dying to hear about me, so here goes. I LOVE BACON! Especially bacon wrapped bacon deep fried in bacon grease. Extra side of bacon please, and a diet coke to drink, i'm watching my figure. I read mother ****ing books yo! Crap about the universe, quantum physics, and biology that would render a normal persons brain into...bacon grease. See what I did there? I work hard so I can buy myself awesome sh*t like a laser that lights sh*t on fire! (I actually got that for Christmas, but I was going to buy one) I also want one of those robots that cleans my carpet. I'll give it a woman's name because lets be honest, that's what you should be doing! I'm kidding! That's what a cleaning lady is for. I am a new age geek. **** dorks and nerds, a bunch of losers if you ask me, which you will because I am so damn interesting. I will trash talk your little brother on Xbox live into submission as I paint his face with a blue fuzzy grenade. Extra points for ANY women who get that. I am VERY busy! That's the reason I have dipped my toes into online dating. If you are a high maintenance, duck face picture taking, can't hang with the guys kind of woman, or if you are a pirate hooker (Long story) Please step to the side to let the awesome chicks by. I will, I repeat, I WILL **** WITH YOU! "I like your blouse! My grandmother just picked the same one up yesterday." Bang! First Date We could start off with a stroll by the local landfill, make fun of the seagulls because there isn't a ****ing ocean in Ohio! Then off to the mall where we will roll a dollar around a piece of poop, place it in public, then yell POOP DOLLAR! as people pick it up. Finally, a karate match between us where I will DECIMATE you with my epic karate chop! At last we have come to the goodnight kiss, which I have already stolen from you earlier in the date because lets be honest, goodnight kisses at the end of a date... awkward! Better to get it out of the way early. If you have the balls, wait gross. If you don't have balls...and think you just might catch my attention, ****ing message me already I am busy over here! That's it gentleman, again any and help is appreciated. I'll keep updates on changes that are offered and implemented to. |
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| Author: | Versalis [ Wed Jan 02, 2013 1:06 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First online dating profile critique needed |
Don't compare yourself to other guys. I suppose the bacon stuff is supposed to be funny. It's fairly lame, imo. But in any case, you overuse humor. Don't be the funny man. No, you don't want to take yourself too seriously, but every line should not be a joke. Especially the first date one. Make that one sincere. Something she can actually imagine herself in and enjoying. You should make at most, one funny point in the first date part. Also, stop swearing so much, unless you like trashy girls(not knocking you if you do, but that is what you'll attract like this). As to pics, you need a "normal" one. One that's just you, hanging out. That needs to be your profile pic. The others are fine, but none of them are good for profile pic. Also, if you're new to this, stay away from dating sites unless you're tall and good looking. You are going to learn a lot more in-field than online. You will usually spend a ton of time online to get results. There are just not that many, young, hot girls on dating sites. |
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