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Asking out an ex colleague
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=151289		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  SE23 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 7:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Asking out an ex colleague
I had to leave my part time job at a casino quite suddenly, due to a mixture of reasons, my boss being a bit of a bully, the night shifts while studying university, and sadly my friend passing away a few days ago.

There is this woman coworker, who i got on well with, there was a bit of a language barrier there but she demonstrated many ioi's, and we got very physically intimate one night at this party i was hosting. Well we didn't have a great deal of time at work to get to know each other better, as it was a hectic job, but i would like to maintain contact and go on a date with her at some point. I asked her out once before to a gig, but she had a legitimate excuse.

Im just asking for some advice or pointers on how i could formulate a message to her about meeting up sometime, or what would be the best date for this setting.

Cheers guys.


p.s. i wouldn't usually be struggling with something as small as this, but I've been out of the game for a while, so I'm leaving it to the expert advice

________

I saw i posted this in the PUA section, apologies
Author:  Fly_Swatter [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 8:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Don't formulate a message... Just open a casual dialogue the natural way.

"Hey I had to quit the casino last week. Tried looking for you to say bye but couldn't find you. Hope you've been okay."

And if she's interested she'll reply with a longer message than yours and some open questions like "why did you quit?" and "how've you been?"

Then you can answer her with a longer message than hers, and some open-ended questions for her, and so on. Eventually it'll come naturally for you to ask her out, or even better she'll hint at wanting to see you again.
Author:  SE23 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 9:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Thats the one, thank you :)
Author:  SE23 [ Sun Nov 25, 2012 5:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
I messaged her, and she responded back asking if i wanted to go for a coffee next week, because she had time off.
I told her I'm busy, which is true, but it sounds like a good idea, and i asked for her number.

its been a while since I've been in this dating game, so how should i work this out. I was thinking of calling her tomorrow and asking her out to that coffee. But i feel like something is missing, should i invite her somewhere else instead, or just go for the "coffee". Any advice on this would be much appreciated, i feel like a noob again.
Author:  Fly_Swatter [ Sun Nov 25, 2012 7:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Her first reply was her asking you out for coffee? Lol, you're in the driver's seat, chill out.

Keep in mind that if you reject a girl because of time constraints, you need to suggest a different date/time so that she knows you're not brushing her off.

But that's fine... Ask her out for coffee. That something missing is a better place to get physical with her. So go for coffee for an hour or two, then take her to a dim-lit bar or lounge where you can move up the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder to some light kissing.
Author:  SE23 [ Sun Nov 25, 2012 7:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Quote:
Her first reply was her asking you out for coffee? Lol, you're in the driver's seat, chill out.

Keep in mind that if you reject a girl because of time constraints, you need to suggest a different date/time so that she knows you're not brushing her off.

But that's fine... Ask her out for coffee. That something missing is a better place to get physical with her. So go for coffee for an hour or two, then take her to a dim-lit bar or lounge where you can move up the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder to some light kissing.
Should i meet her in the evening then ?
and would you say its best i call her tomorrow instead of all that amateur text lark :P
I am aware push and pull is crucial in approaching such things.

Well done FS you are helping me fit back into the gaming world again :)
Author:  Fly_Swatter [ Sun Nov 25, 2012 7:46 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Evening dates are always better for intimacy, yes.

Whether you call or text her is irrelevant... Use the way you prefer and feel the most comfortable in.

Also, in your case, you can forget all these PUA theories because she clearly wants your dick... She's the one making pretty large advances.
Author:  SE23 [ Sun Nov 25, 2012 7:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Quote:
Evening dates are always better for intimacy, yes.

Whether you call or text her is irrelevant... Use the way you prefer and feel the most comfortable in.

Also, in your case, you can forget all these PUA theories because she clearly wants your dick... She's the one making pretty large advances.
yeah it certainly seems that way, even though il play this cool, il give her a call, because its more forward and texts are child splay. I will suggest the place as well.
Author:  SE23 [ Mon Nov 26, 2012 1:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
Ah i feel like a noob for asking these questions, but seriously its been a while and i don't' have anyone else to ask for advice.

I called her up today asking her if she could do wednesday around 4 or five, and she asked if i could make it earlier, and i suggested a time a bit earlier than the one she suggested.

Anyway this is a date for "coffee" which she suggested, in the day time. It sounds like purely a comfort building exercise rather than a intimate thing,
so would the rules of building kino/DHV spikes etc still apply ?
It has been a while for me since I've been on dates, so any advice from the PUA community would be appreciated.
She is 28, I'm 20 years old,
Author:  Fly_Swatter [ Mon Nov 26, 2012 4:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Asking out an ex colleague
You should have made it later in the evening when you know the both of you don't work the following day... But that's fine.

If you go to a Starbucks try to get a couch. If you can't, sit near the couch and grab the place right away as soon as the fuckwads leave. It would be socially acceptable for you to engage in light touching or small pecks on the cheeks or lips if you're able to build enough rapport. Just forget the people around you. I'd say don't be nervous, but I guess that only comes with practice.
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