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am i in the friend zone?
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Author:  SSdoppelganger [ Tue Nov 20, 2012 11:55 pm ]
Post subject:  am i in the friend zone?
K so I guess I'll start from the beginning.

There's this girl at work who I am EXTREMELY attracted to. Me and her have become quite close friends and when the subject of relationships came up she told me that she had a 'partner' but made it clear that they weren't proper boyfriend and girlfriend. Soon after that, I asked her if she was free to do some shisha (but worded in a way that made it seem just friendly) she was more than happy to do it. On the day that we were going to do shisha, out of the blue, she told me that she's thinking about breaking up with him (he treats her like shit tbh).

Me and her have quite a touchy feely relationship. She has let me put my arm around her and rested her head on my shoulder. She reaches out and touches me occasionally. We call each other 'darling' and 'love' and she has shown what I thought are some classic IOI's (coyly asking if I was in a relationship, noticing me purposely ignoring her and trying to draw my attention by lowering her head, looking at me and tucking her hair behind her ear, touching my hand when the occasion rises).

The only thing holding me back from asking her is the fact that she really is an absolute stunner of a woman and hence I am intimidated. We talked a lot during that outing but I just didn't have the balls to say anything deeper to her or even ask her out again at the end.

She's made it clear that she's willing to date other men now and already said that she was about to start dating some other guy. What would be the best approach to try and get her to go a more intimate date? Am I too late and in the friend zone already?
Author:  BITmixit [ Wed Nov 21, 2012 12:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
Quote:
Am I too late and in the friend zone already?
Look bro, a woman will respect you MUCH MUCH MUCH more if you just tell her or ask her out.

tbh it sounds like she is interested.
Author:  beingattractive [ Wed Nov 21, 2012 1:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
Has she done any of the following?

- Has she ever talked to you about her personal problems?
- Has she ever talked to you about other guys?
- Does she seem too comfortable around you?
- Does she have a lot of other guy friends?
- Does she only hang out with you when she has nothing else to do?
- Has she ever told you that your such a good friend?
- Does she only call you when she needs something?
- Does she avoid dressing up for you when hanging out?

It sounds like shes half/half, there are signs of interest but it seems like she is also treating you as a friend.

You need to stop being intimated by her, you're the prize remember? It's a privilege for her to be around you. Do you create any sexual tension when your out on dates? If you don't thats the reason... Here is what you can say.

You: "I can tell your totally into me."
Her: "lol no im not!"
You: "Yeah you are... You might say no but your eyes say yes..."
Author:  The Joker S [ Wed Nov 21, 2012 3:00 am ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
Quote:
Has she done any of the following?

- Has she ever talked to you about her personal problems?
- Has she ever talked to you about other guys?
- Does she seem too comfortable around you?
- Does she have a lot of other guy friends?
- Does she only hang out with you when she has nothing else to do?
- Has she ever told you that your such a good friend?
- Does she only call you when she needs something?
- Does she avoid dressing up for you when hanging out?

It sounds like shes half/half, there are signs of interest but it seems like she is also treating you as a friend.

You need to stop being intimated by her, you're the prize remember? It's a privilege for her to be around you. Do you create any sexual tension when your out on dates? If you don't thats the reason... Here is what you can say.

You: "I can tell your totally into me."
Her: "lol no im not!"
You: "Yeah you are... You might say no but your eyes say yes..."
I have similar problems with another girl whos a ten.
That is eyes line I am stealing.
Author:  beingattractive [ Wed Nov 21, 2012 11:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
Quote:
I have similar problems with another girl whos a ten.
That is eyes line I am stealing.
Go for it brother! That's why I'm sharing them. =) Visit my blog for more lines.
Author:  Mago812 [ Thu Nov 22, 2012 12:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
I'd say we have to be careful with this one. I know there is some general idea in the community, but... Some of my personal experience and quotes.

- Has she ever talked to you about her personal problems? I was often the first call of my exes when something bad/good happened to them. Not boyfriends, relatives or BFFs.
- Has she ever talked to you about other guys? "My boyfriend is this and that, my ex did this...but you are so different from other guys". And i had cases when they tried to make me yellous.."OMG I met the cutest guy the other day..."
- Does she have a lot of other guy friends?You just have to stand out in some way.
- Does she only hang out with you when she has nothing else to do?Personally, i dont keep it against them if they choose studying or practicing something over me. I do not like it if i get flaked on because of other people. Get the difference? But yeah, it is a problem if she only calls you like once in two weeks for a short hang out.
- Has she ever told you that your such a good friend?I get that alot...even from my girlfriends. AND IT CAN ONLY BE A TEST. YOu just have to play with it and tell her something like we are too good of a friends to ever date and break up
- Does she only call you when she needs something?Do know when she actually needs something...dont mistake "When we have classes tomorrow?" for taking advantage when it could actually be a try for convo initiation.
- Does she avoid dressing up for you when hanging out?Again, it depends where you are hanging out. I have girls who will say they feel comfortable with me wearing anything [hanging at her place] while at the same time overdressing the hell out of her when she goes out with me in the evening or when meeting my friends.

These are the way she will act when with a friend...or with her "perfect boyfriend" (all of them will say: I want a guy who will listen to me, not care about my looks, stuff like that...you can be all that, and with a little of PU dust, you can even get her in a relationship.)

From what you have written, i'd say your chances are great. Just dont get pissed and brake the contact if she gives you LJBF at first.
Author:  SSdoppelganger [ Mon Nov 26, 2012 12:33 am ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
UPDATE

she's made it clear that she has completely broken up with her boyfriend and now that i have a new phone shes telling me to SPAM her and stuff. the next time we work together is on saturday but i really don't want to wait until the moment is cold. i'd REALLY love to go out with her again but i'm not sure how to word it because this time i cannot possibly put in a tone of 'just friends' if it's just going to be with me and her (if i did, then i would definitely fall straight into the friend zone). what would you guys advise?
Author:  Fly_Swatter [ Mon Nov 26, 2012 2:37 am ]
Post subject:  Re: am i in the friend zone?
Where are your testicles? Do you have them? Look for them, and grab them.

Do not ask her out. Do not bring up relationship potential with her. Instead, TAKE HER OUT. You've already been touching quite a bit. Look at the DiCarlo Escalation ladder. Now you need to move up and start touching her inner thighs, making contact with her face, and giving her quick and light pecks on her cheeks, and progressing to kissing her lips very swiftly.

If you ask her out, you risk the danger of not being told the truth of how she may feel.

If you try kissing her, only her true feelings will speak for her actions. If she's attracted, she'll allow the kissing to stand. If she rejects you, then you know she may not be attracted.

She already told you she broke up with her boyfriend. That's your fucking green light to man the fuck up and pull out the guns.
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