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| She cancelled on our first date https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=150452 |
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| Author: | jobu155 [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 8:12 pm ] |
| Post subject: | She cancelled on our first date |
So I met this girl on the internet and we had planned to go out on our first date. I texted her the morning of the date to make sure we were still on. She replied back telling me she forgot she had made other plans and had to cancel. She asked if we could get together the next day, but we never made any solid plans. While I think she was making something up, I'm trying to stay positive and give her the benefit of doubt. My questions is since she picked another day to get together, should I be the one contacting her to see if we are still on? I tend to think since she cancelled that it's up to her to confirm. If she doesn't respond, should I give up all together or try again in a couple more days? thanks in advance. |
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| Author: | Little Panda [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 8:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Have you decided where you're going yet? If not, text her something like 'I know this good Mojito place we could go to . . . Good music, great ambient. Say at 9pm?' The point of ^this is to be specific and make plans immediately instead of being vague and ask her if she is 'still on' for something you haven't even planned yet. If you don't have details and specific plans, the chances are more likely that she feel flake since she feels no excitement of going 'somewhere' and doing 'something' because it lacks motivation. |
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| Author: | TheAnimal [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 8:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
take charge of the hole situation... and make her feel like she should be lucky to get the chance of being with you! the thing many girls do is they tests guys, to find out who's bf material and who's not! |
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| Author: | 0uch [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 9:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
She has an abundance mentality, that's why she flaked. I would run with that and flake on the plans for next day and make plans for some other days. Personally, if you try to make plans with her for next day, you are gonna seem way to desperate IMO. |
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| Author: | Snarg [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 9:44 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: She has an abundance mentality, that's why she flaked. I would run with that and flake on the plans for next day and make plans for some other days.
If you flake on her immediately after she flakes on you, doesn't that come off as being kind of passive-aggressive though? Almost like you're trying to get even with her, or get revenge in some way? Unless of course you use an extremely good excuse, in which case it would lose its effectiveness anyway, right? I'm not trying to argue; I'm actually curious about what you and others think about this.
Personally, if you try to make plans with her for next day, you are gonna seem way to desperate IMO. |
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| Author: | TheAnimal [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 9:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
i would agree with you snarg. we all now how girls talk to eachother about anything and if you flake on her, you are going to be known as the guy who got mad tried to punish her for flaking on you in the first place... especially if she is testing you, then you should act like nothing happend... but im also curious to hear what 0uch's plan was, and in a more detailed description 
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| Author: | jobu155 [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I kind of felt that after being flaked on it would seem desperate to try and get her to go out the next day even though she suggested it. I guess I didn't contact her to see if she was actually interested in following through on her suggestion. My plan was to contact her in a couple days if I didn't hear from her but now I'm wondering if that is the right plan. I guess I'm also not understanding why she would be testing me in the first place considering this was our first date and we have never even met. |
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| Author: | Snarg [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I kind of felt that after being flaked on it would seem desperate to try and get her to go out the next day even though she suggested it. I guess I didn't contact her to see if she was actually interested in following through on her suggestion. My plan was to contact her in a couple days if I didn't hear from her but now I'm wondering if that is the right plan. I guess I'm also not understanding why she would be testing me in the first place considering this was our first date and we have never even met.
I always allow for one flake in the beginning, because honestly, shit does happen.So, I agree with your plan. Give her a few days then make contact again. If she declines or flakes again, find a new girl. |
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| Author: | Versalis [ Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Also, too... pick a different date location. Chance she thought "X sounds lame, rather just meet up with my girlfriends for dinner". |
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| Author: | 0uch [ Mon Nov 12, 2012 9:19 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Use a good excuse and your good with flaking. But re plan at the same time so your not coming off as a jerk. |
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