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Help! No respect!
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Author:  Xeydo [ Tue Nov 06, 2012 8:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Help! No respect!
So I got back with my ex few weeks ago, now she's being all bitchy and moody, disrespects me and bombards me with insults.

At first I told her "Stop this right now!" which got her even more mad, she started to tell me how my behavior is insulting and such, and eventually I told her "why are you behaving like this? it doesn't matter what I did to you, nothing deserves such an attitude" and finally disarmed her by telling her how I took a day off to meet her tomorrow, then she went quiet and told me "now I feel bad...I'm so sorry..." then I told her "don't feel sorry. my point is you shouldn't be so negative and appreciate thing I do for you. BUT you owe me now, don't even try talking to me before you'll give me a huge kiss" and then negged her around a bit and finished the conversation.

I feel like the world's no. 1 AFC right now, how the hell should I deal with these situations?

It goes something like this:
Me: I can't make it tomorrow, I'm busy at work, I don't pimp around
Her: Oh yeah? Maybe you should pimp around your little girlfriend (my previous ex) or let her send some more pictures of her [oh shit, just came up something...should've asked her why she feels so threatened about her!]
Me: Why are you so negative?
Her: You treat me bad all the time..blablabla
Me: Why do you never look at all the great stuff we do?
Her: What great stuff??
Me: See? You can't even remember them
Her: *sigh*

...it always goes something like this. Sometimes I feel I'm in a sitcom...

When we're both calm and talk about all these shitty fights, she tells me she's just angry at me for breaking up with her for the first time (f-ing lame excuse).

How do I disarm the shitstorm before it gets to a critical mass??
Author:  Florg [ Tue Nov 06, 2012 8:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Gotta be honest, this girl just sounds like a bad time waiting to happen. I wouldn't even want to hang around someone who is such a downer. If you want her she is clearly interested, at least to some degree by her jealousy.

In all honesty, I'm not even sure sex is a good enough reason to tolerate a person with such an air of negativity, she's just gonna try to drag you down with her.
Author:  Xeydo [ Tue Nov 06, 2012 8:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thank you for your answer, however what's bothering me right now is my response to her bitchiness and shit-tests I feel like I'm not controlling the frame at all and I'd like to fix that.
About the relationship - I know what you're talking about, but I prefer not to deal with it at the moment, but rather focus on ME.
Author:  Don Horneone [ Tue Nov 06, 2012 10:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Help! No respect!
Quote:
How do I disarm the shitstorm before it gets to a critical mass??
Is "dump her" a good enough answer or were you looking for something cleverer than that?
Author:  midlife_crysus [ Tue Nov 06, 2012 10:12 pm ]
Post subject: 
Respect is huge. If a woman doesnt respect you she will shit all over you.

I had a gf who when I would tell a joke or say something funny, she would exagerrate her laugh and give me this little slap on the face as she was laughing.

It was the most condescending thing, I thought about it for a while, and decided it wasnt owrth confronting her about it. Like why do u do that? or stop doing that?

Cause if she respected me, she wouldnt do it in the first place. She didnt think I was
anything special evidently, so she enjoyed doing it.

So the final time, she laughed and smacked me, and I say I Love when you do that,
and said good night.

Never called her again, she tried to call me every night after for about two weeks, and then I didnt answer when she knocked on my door.

Never told her why, but It must have been something with me, if she respected me as I said, she wouldnt do it, so she didnt.

Made me focus on myself and forget about her.

If a woman respects you she wont play petty games, she will feel you are too valube to do that to.

find one who respects you
Author:  puaninja [ Tue Nov 06, 2012 11:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
I would quickly determine whether or not she has any intention of knocking off this mean-spiritedness, and if not, punish her by not contacting her and be curt when she contacts you. Otherwise it will just continue on and on to no avail.

Tell her "Let's try being nice to each other and see what happens then."
Author:  Xeydo [ Wed Nov 07, 2012 5:05 am ]
Post subject: 
Can we focus on the situation rather than on the relationship itself?

Puaninja- won't it seems passive-aggressive?
Author:  The Dice [ Wed Nov 07, 2012 7:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Go for The Soft Next. Works like a charm!

1-vt125554.html?start=0
Author:  Xeydo [ Wed Nov 07, 2012 8:10 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks a lot for the link, I remember doing this before (we've been together for 2.5 years), her reaction was eventually getting offended when she found out I did it on purpose. Needless to say she was scared from behaving in such a way for a while.
Author:  Xeydo [ Wed Nov 07, 2012 10:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
Awesome, just had another convo with her when she started talking about our breakup; about how she's not feeling regrets about anything she's done (she almost had sex with her "new boyfriend") and basically made me feel all shitty.
I went all cold and told her I've got to go, she started asking what's wrong and if it's something she said, I simply told her "I'm busy, talk to you tomorrow".

We planned on meeting tomorrow at her place for a 1st time anal (lol) but I think I'm gonna flake on her as a punishment. It is possible she will take it very hard and will possibly even break up with me for flaking her and not telling her what I feel.
Author:  machiavillain [ Wed Nov 07, 2012 11:12 pm ]
Post subject: 
Speaking of no respect... I'm just posting here my 50th post because I want to post on the PUA lounge. Cheers mate. gl
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