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| Did I handle this rejection poorly? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=149053 |
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| Author: | dweeks77 [ Thu Oct 25, 2012 5:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | Did I handle this rejection poorly? |
So I met a girl, we liked each other. Left for summer, came back. The attraction was still there but I was acting like a doormat. I got sick of it so I called her out, and she liked me more. We went on a date, and after she told me she wanted to be friends. I didn't talk to her for a week and out of the blue I texted her, "I want you at our house for our party" and she said, "haha why" and I said, "I want you, im tired of beating around the bush". Well she wanted me and then i got cockblocked by her crying friend at the party. When she left i texted her 3 times generally saying I want you back here. Well her grandma was dying, so I called her basically making sure she was doing OK. Then my birthday was monday, and she was the first one at midnight to tell me and said "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! I love ya!"(i guess friend way) to tell me and she bought me a cupcake for it. Well we went to the bar and I gotta pretty drunk and I started doing little things like tugging at her waist after a joke, and things like that, and she said, "youre being very touchy." Well after that, I was hanging out with other friends and I saw her just leave the bar without even saying anything and it was my birthday. I went outside to say something to her about doing that and she just kept walking so I turned around and went back to the bar. I texted her "screw you for just leaving like that" She then said "I dont like you, You freaked me out tonight, I told you i just want to be friends" I said "I thought you did like me, but nevermind i get the idea. just dont come around our house (a big house with lots of guys, a party site). I then said "I honestly dont get you" At the beginning I was pretty AFC, I would go pick her up from the bar, and go see her, and always ask her for her to hang out and she would flake half the time. Well I stepped it up and then she just friend zoned me, then wanted me, then told me she didn't like me. I mean Im not ugly, im in a very respected social group. What did I do, or not do? |
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| Author: | LD [ Thu Oct 25, 2012 8:49 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
that was indeed handled poorly. Very poorly. what you did good was this: "I want you, im tired of beating around the bush" but your timing was off. She already let you know that she only wants to be friends. So next time, if you want to be straightforward, do it faster, do it right at that time when you know you like her enough to say it. For the rest, what went wrong. well, what not. You acted a bit like a spoiled kid that didnt get what he wanted. All of a sudden you were touchy because you were drunk. that is why pua and booze dont really mix. You make stupid afc mistakes that way. You might wonder why she liked you before and then all of sudden not anymore. But see it this way: when you start seeing somebody and he/she seems like fun, firends-fun. And then something happens that shows how annoying that person is. It is cause enough for me to not like that person anymore. An example are Cling-ons. Girls that seem very cool in the beginning and you show some friendly interest. Bam, all of a sudden they have this urge to stick to you like glue. That exact moment, i dont like then anymore, from one moment to another. THe same thing happened to her. You freaked her out. In the future, at least dont be so childish anymore to send her texts telling her not to come by anymore and that you dont get her. Especially not when you have been drinking. Everybody can win as a man, however few can lose like a man. cheers and good luck |
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| Author: | glowstik [ Thu Oct 25, 2012 2:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
lol "screw you" naww that is never good. You shouldnt be getting drunk in front of a girl you like... this is what can happen |
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| Author: | User13247 [ Thu Oct 25, 2012 2:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I think everyone can agree that you handled this poorly, but don't worry about it too much. Everyone makes mistakes (I made quite a few yesterday myself), and realizing that you made a mistake is a great opportunity to learn. I think your main problem is escalation with physical contact. I think a lack of escalation during your date was what got you friendzoned in the first place. And obviously, you did not build up enough attraction to touch her the way you did at your party. Perhaps you escalated too quickly there, skipping crucial steps, misinterpreting her body language or simply ignoring it. For example, I am wondering if you are really correct in your assessment when you say this: "Well she wanted me and then i got cockblocked by her crying friend at the party." Did she tell you, did you kiss, stare into each others eyes? And even though they are negative, there are emotions going on, so that's a silver lining. You just need to find a way to turn those negative emotions into positive ones. |
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