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| Pissed At Myself https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=148182 |
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| Author: | CaptainKick [ Sun Oct 14, 2012 5:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | Pissed At Myself |
First, here's some backstory. I was never very socially outgoing, but I'm funny and good at parties where I know people. I have a great personality but I have a hard time thinking of things to say in conversations. I'm physically attractive and good at sex. I'm not saying these things to be arrogant, I'd just like to think that I have a good sense of my strengths and weaknesses. I had 2 girlfriends by the time I hit 8th grade (one lasting one day, one lasting two weeks). Around that time, I met my future stepbrother who gave me a lot of tips when it came to dealing with females. All throughout high school, I was good with girls and enjoyed it. Around senior year, I began losing most of my friends due to external circumstances. I began dating this girl that I really liked and had been best friends with for a few months. We dated for a few months and I fell for her. We broke up after around 6 months and it hit me hard. After two months, she began talking to me again because she missed the sex but I still wanted more than that. We began a weird cycle of hooking up and then not talking for weeks which drove me crazy and made me want her more. From August of my senior year (2011/2012) until (admittedly) now, I've wanted to get back with this girl. This isn't oneitis, I'm not in love with her, I want other girls, but she's had a pretty deep impact on my love life. End of backstory. That leads me to now. Being a freshman in college, one expects me to be having sex with girls all the time. I've had sex with one girl at college and hooked up with four or five more, leaving me unsatisfied with myself. I've felt myself slipping into pre-high school friendzone-ness and I want to stop that more than anything. I've identified the main problem as being unable to tell when a girl is being flirty just because she's being friendly or if she's being flirty because she wants something more. Tonight, I went to the movies with a girl and she doing the usual flirty things (throwing popcorn at me, poking me, etc.) but she'd also do things like move her arm if I put mine near hers. I've gotten to where I take one IOD to mean that she's uninterested or just being friendly and I just cannot figure out for the life of me what a good move would be to escalate it. If she's doing something flirty throwing popcorn at me, where does it go from there? Do I just randomly put my arm around her? Grab her hand with mine and just hold on? I want a way to move from the "Oh he's my best friend!" kind of flirty behavior to something way more sensual. It just kills me that I can get to this point and then bitch out because mixed signals drive me crazy. Another of my friends overheard this girl talking to her friend about her friend Nikki (who I've had a class with) having a crush on me. As she didn't know that she was being eavesdropped on, I have no problem with believing that it's true. A day or two later, I texted her and I never got a response. Just to drive it in, I had a girl verbally admit to wanting me and I still couldn't make a connection. I feel like my high school self would be so disappointed when it came to girls. For my sake and the good of the community, how do I move past this? Knowing which flirting is friendly and which is not? Which moves to make so the escalation seems natural? It seems kind of silly to make a post about not being able to get girls that are flirting with me, but my sense of flirt-judgement has gone way down since I started dating my big ex. Thank you. TL;DR - I used to be good with girls, now I feel myself slipping to the point where I can't recognize/respond to basic flirts because I was emotionally screwed up over an ex for a year. |
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