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| Am I being an overreacting and jealous boyfriend? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=147525 |
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| Author: | Komodo [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 11:25 am ] |
| Post subject: | Am I being an overreacting and jealous boyfriend? |
Hey guys, Yesterday I was really drunk at a bar with some friends and my girlfriend. I was walking through the bar and I see my girlfriend ordering drinks with some guy and think it's probably an old friend of hers. They seemed to be having a laugh together. Then she starts dancing infront of him and he starts to take pictures of her. I didn't like what I was seeing so I go tell her I have to talk to her, took her hand and lead us to a quiet corner. I jokingly said "it's cute you've found a new crush" and she gets really pissed at me for saying that. I tell her "it's weird for you to dance infront of some guy as he takes pictures of you". She says it's her classmate and that he's married and that she was also surprised he started taking pictures of her. After that she almost starts to cry because of my lack of trust in her. I explained to her that it's okay for her to make friends with her classmates but I didn't like the dancing and taking pictures part. After that I did feel a bit like a jealous dickhead but still the whole situation seemed odd. Later when I was leaving with my girlfriend she said her goodbyes to her classmates. She gave the same guy a hug and his hand wandered towards her ass but I didn't say anything about that because I didn't want to look anymore insecure. I really don't know what to make of this situation. Am I seriously overreacting or should I be concerned? I trust my girlfriend but I definitely don't trust other guys, doesn't make much of a difference if they're married or not. Now she's pissed off at me for not trusting her and thinking that she would break my trust in any way. Shes been giving me the silent SPAM ever since this happened. Would really appreciate some input on this from you guys. |
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| Author: | SE23 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 11:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
No you are being fine, explain to her how it looked from your point of view. |
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| Author: | puaninja [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Only thing I would've done differently would to break that fucking camera over that guys head. |
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| Author: | Komodo [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I did actually tell her to think about it from my point of view and asked her how she would feel if I would've done the same. Went something like this: Me: How would you feel if I danced in front of a girl while she took pictures of me? Her: He's my classmate! I can't believe your first thought was that I'm disrespecting you in some way! Me: Like I said, it's seriously weird for a guy to take pictures of you while you're dancing infront of him. Her: Bla bla bla... I just want you to know that I cook for you, clean for you and keep my self in good shape for you and you still have thoughts like that about me. I would never betray your trust and I don't want you to feel that way! She is an awesome girlfriend but shit like this is a big minus point for her. Sometimes it's just hard to fully trust her after she does stuff like this. She doesn't even seem to realise how it looks from my perspective. I never did ask her directly why she was dancing infront of him. Should I still bring this up tonight when I see her or just let the whole thing slide? |
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| Author: | SE23 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:51 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I would leave her to be honest, you can do without that. |
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| Author: | Crypto [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Confront her about being a little bitch! "You going to hold onto this forever? I let it go as soon as you explained the situation, you should do the same!" If she doesn't comply then I would say "Guess that's that!" and then leave without saying another word... Let her mind make your argument for you. She will fight her emotional battle inside her head and in the end you will get her apologizing 90% of the time! Peace... |
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| Author: | puaninja [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
They are in a relationship, so thinking back to my last relationships, this is what you typically do as a respone. The next day don't really say anything to her and just be reticent and detached all day. Eventually she'll catch on to it and come right out and ask you "What's your problem?!" Then you simply respond, "I don't know, why don't you go ask THAT GUY who was taking all those PICTURES of you?!?" |
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| Author: | Komodo [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 9:41 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for the replies you guys. So yesterday she came over, she hadn't eaten all day and had obviously been crying and was pretty messed up. Her: So is everything okay now? Me: I'm still dissapointed about the situation. Her: I was just a bit angry because it feels like you don't trust me but I know I shouldn't have sulked like that. Me: I trust you but that doesn't mean I like seeing you do stuff like that. Her: (Starts to cry) It feels like I've failed you and I really don't want that. Me: Let's not ruin our relationship with stupid shit like this. After that we had some mind blowing sex and everything seems to be back to normal now but I still feel she didn't really understand that it was not acceptable for her to do that. I don't feel like bringing this up anymore, so if she does stuff like this again I guess I'll have to let her go. Gonna keep my eyes open and see how this plays out. |
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| Author: | JimmyStyles [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 10:14 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I can't believe some of the comments I'm reading... You were a jealous dick. You should have taken the attention that she was receiving as a compliment - your gf is a girl that others guys (even married guys) are attracted to. She was just being a normal, happy girl. Do you expect her to be rude or act 'cold' whenever she talks to another guy? They are friends, so of course she is going to be nice to him. She didn't cheat, so what's the problem? If she actually had feelings for the guy, do you think that she would have openly displayed them in front of you? No. She would have been discreet. It probably didn't even occur to her that she was acting in a way that made you jealous. Stop being a jealous controlling bf. It will make your life easier and less stressful. |
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| Author: | Snake Doctor [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 10:18 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Women... Mate she knows what she is doing is wrong and disrepteful. The guy is married? Woahhh the guy has a penis... like she believes being married man or women dont cheat The part of starting to cry , is her way of manipulating you, because in her mind she knows what she did was wrong, dont believe herl If it was the other way around she would jump on you like tiger and would be very angry. I would advice to be on the lookout for that sort of behavior, and if she pulled again that shit, I would think seriously on that relantioship. But you shouldnt have act like a jealousy person and confronting and causing a scene, you should leave her behavior and the next day have a talk with her |
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| Author: | JimmyStyles [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 10:23 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote:
But you shouldnt have act like a jealousy person and confronting and causing a scene, you should leave her behavior and the next day have a talk with her
This is the most important point that has been stated.
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