PUA Forum :: How do you deal with friends who try to put you down?

Author:

lukeyx [ Sun Sep 16, 2012 7:14 pm ]

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didnt you answer your own question?

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my friend stood up for me and basically played them out. Asking them , "so which one of you has the best joke, tell me the joke" and then they say the mama joke it and no one laughed. Then he told them that hes pretty sure that I don't appreciate the jokes and they asked me and I was like yeah I don't like it cant you guys tell... Then they said sorry and no more jokes came from them. The point is, if me or my friend didn't stand up and deal with it, the problem would still be there.

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Another friend always talks negative shit about me when we are in a group but when im with him alone he tries to boost me and gives compliments etc. This guy pisses me off the most because of that and he talks the most shit

you call him a friend?

if a guy ever pisses me off directly in a group and i dont really know him to well or I recently met him, i will look directly at him and tell him to shut the fuck up. I will not look away from him until a few seconds after he has looked away. Usually they pull away and stop saying shit. The only time you should not do this is if the guy is drunk or massive lol.

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i even ended up asking him how much drinks I owe him and i baught for him like 3 times in a row

don't do this, if someone ever tells me to do this, i would tell them to shut up, and that if he ever asks me to buy drinks again i will get everyone else one except him. He knows you get drinks in, he's just being an asshole.

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I am the joker type of guy so its hard for me to talk to them in a serious tone. I don't need any of them, I am the one who knows all the girls and the parties. They don't give me nothing beneficial and they are not my real friends.

I always joke about things until someone directly pisses me off. If you don't need them and your the boss, then why have them? There no good to you.

Author:	[AFC] Socrates [ Sun Sep 16, 2012 6:58 pm ]
Post subject:	How do you deal with friends who try to put you down?
So I am like a joker type guy , not really serious most of the time and laugh at jokes if they are directed towards me. I think because of my personality, I am vulnerable to bullying or picking on because people can say shit about me and I will just laugh or ignore it out. Lately I have had enough of that shit , I'v realized that without taking action it will just go on and on . For example, a couple of kids were making "mama jokes" to me and I just ignored them saying "cool joke", "good one" etc. But they wouldn't stop. I told one of my friends about how i felt about these immature guys and the next time they made a joke in front of me and my friend, my friend stood up for me and basically played them out. Asking them , "so which one of you has the best joke, tell me the joke" and then they say the mama joke it and no one laughed. Then he told them that hes pretty sure that I don't appreciate the jokes and they asked me and I was like yeah I don't like it cant you guys tell... Then they said sorry and no more jokes came from them. The point is, if me or my friend didn't stand up and deal with it, the problem would still be there. Other examples are from my closer friends who I see more often at collage. When they share stories from parties, they somehow bend the truth and start to lie and make me look bad. For example my friend was saying how i was falling on the ground drunk , yet I wasn't that drunk. Why do they lie to put me down? As I tell the group that he is lying ( I am also smiling while saying this), they don't take my credibility and he says "no im not" . Another friend always talks negative shit about me when we are in a group but when im with him alone he tries to boost me and gives compliments etc. This guy pisses me off the most because of that and he talks the most shit. He thinks he is all this and that, yet I am the real leader of the group. Maybe he just sees me as a threat and makes fun of me to make himself seem better than me. On the bus he called me cheap because i never buy rounds at the pub, yet I do buy many times...he is the only guy who says that for some reason. He made that remark many times... i even ended up asking him how much drinks I owe him and i baught for him like 3 times in a row. On the bus though, I just snapped and got pissed because he called me cheap again. We started arguing and my other friend was saying calm down. I am trying to get rid of him as a friend and I ignore his texts and calls. I only reply if I need to because he always msgs me to find out where the parties are at and stuff. Do you guys know people who are like that? I don't know how to deal with them and what to do. I am the joker type of guy so its hard for me to talk to them in a serious tone. I don't need any of them, I am the one who knows all the girls and the parties. They don't give me nothing beneficial and they are not my real friends. Should I even care when they make fun of me or put me down? OR should I take action.

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Author:	Chinopants [ Sun Sep 16, 2012 7:51 pm ]
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Yo Mama so fat that..... Really why are you hanging out with kids. Find your self a place with class and some people that are above the locker room humor. Also sure they were not just in to you and Negging you cuz your sexy?

Author:	IwantEasyLove [ Sun Sep 16, 2012 8:10 pm ]
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Accountablity is the way to deal with a bully. If there is no cost for their negative behavior they will keep it up and whats more they will encourage other people to make fun of you since others will see there is no cost for such behavior. In fact, it may seem like you want to be treated like that. If you don't stand up for youself no one will. Confront them when they are alone Humiliate them in front of others Ignore them. Fuck them.

Author:	IwantEasyLove [ Sun Sep 16, 2012 9:15 pm ]
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However, the problem is this. When you are friends someone you don't want to hurt them, but if you're going to stand up to someone you have to have "bad intentions."

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