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The scoop on eye contact: Opinions and experiences
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Author:  DeathShredder23 [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 2:26 am ]
Post subject:  The scoop on eye contact: Opinions and experiences
Hey dudes. I have studied body language and really tried to dig into the topic of eye contact. It's weird, because before I got into the community, I had a lot of trouble holding (and keeping) eye contact with an attractive woman, but now, it's not even a concern. I bring this up though because I have a lot more fun with eye contact now. I love it!!! I literally make it a point to hold and keep eye contact with almost everyone on a daily basis. Even dudes that could potentially kick my ass. I love challenging myself. :)
I have tried to gather information on it, and to study it's effect on the opposite sex. I haven't been able to find much. I DO know that never being the first to break eye contact with a woman shows confidence, and dominance, buttttt I really want to get down to every aspect of it. I would love to hear from anybody that has a strong opinion on anything eye contact related, and even more great would be to get feedback from a couple of you dudes who've had experiences interacting with women where your eye, or hers, had a profound effect on the interaction. I would really enjoy hearing from you guys and sharing advice/opinions/thoughts. I realize that there are probably a bunch of eye contact related posts on this forum, butttt I'm a lazy fuck and I didn't wanna go digging. Besides, I think this is way more fun. Hope to hear back from some of you dudes real soon. -Shredder
Author:  tsoscorpian [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 3:25 am ]
Post subject: 
wow funny how no-one has any input yet! okay bro this is for sure a fun game! if she stares at you for like fifteen seconds or so (please don't count it thats kinda weird) either go talk to her or invite her over.

when she looks up or away forget it, she's not interested

When she looks down this is good! approach!

when she has nervous body language! possibly a good approach!

please practice saying something and smiling too when you do this or you'll look creepy!

Complex eye contact:
left eye is congruent to the right side of the brain which is logical.

so right eye = left hemisphere of the brain which is emotional.


During conversation:
deep comfort right eye to right eye contact

attraction right to right

making witty comments left to left then left to right as the comment ends will have tremendous effects


comedy goes the same as witty comments

regular comfort (jobs, blah blah) left to left, alternate right to left.

just start practicing controlling which eye you use without looking like a freak

Dominance holding eye contact even when asked a question. most people look down or away to think, holding eye contact and responding without looking away shows ddominance but don't overuse this one and only use it when its needed. sometimes holding eye contact can help you show attraction during qualification, without verbally saying it such as: you hold eye contact when you say something and give your speech a little pause on purpose then continue still holding eye contact and look away after the sentence is thru.


but my best advice is don't make yourself look like a wierdo. let it be as natural as possible.
Author:  DeathShredder23 [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 3:44 am ]
Post subject: 
Holy shit dude. Haha, that was some great input. Really good stuff. I'm confused about one thing though. How do you look at a chick's eye with only one of yours? Sounds difficult.
Author:  Night_ [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 4:08 am ]
Post subject: 
eye contact is so important! i just got into this whole gaming scene im still very newbie and reading a lot but i cant believe i never used eye contact before!!

its great and fun and btw im also practicing on everyone include dudes..its a good thing it shows ur really listening
Author:  GKS [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 5:34 am ]
Post subject: 
The most easy way to do it is to picture what you want to say to her in your head and try to pretend that your eyes are saying those stuffs to her. I had fun with it. The girls always told me that there is something mysterious and so expressive when I look at them.

Other than that, I just keep in mind that left = creative , right = logical. Eye level: up = recalling or make up visual experience. Down = emotions. Ear = Hearing experiences.
Author:  DeathShredder23 [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 5:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
This stuff is no doubt helpful but I'm still confused about my question. I have a book on NLP, so I have some basic understanding that the left side of the brain is emotional and the ride side is logical, sooooo how do you act on that then? Try to be a bit more specific if you could. For example, when speaking to her, if you want to evoke some emotion in the conversation, you just look into her right eye, correct? It doesn't matter if you look into it with both eyes, and I think that's where I had myself confused. We're human beings, not fucking chameleons. We can't do that "only one eye looking into one of her eyes" shit. Haha, did I pretty much answer my own question there?
Author:  GKS [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 6:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
This stuff is no doubt helpful but I'm still confused about my question. I have a book on NLP, so I have some basic understanding that the left side of the brain is emotional and the ride side is logical, sooooo how do you act on that then? Try to be a bit more specific if you could. For example, when speaking to her, if you want to evoke some emotion in the conversation, you just look into her right eye, correct? It doesn't matter if you look into it with both eyes, and I think that's where I had myself confused. We're human beings, not fucking chameleons. We can't do that "only one eye looking into one of her eyes" shit. Haha, did I pretty much answer my own question there?
Don't complicate things. The only you need to know about NLP eye contact is anchoring. During the conversation, choose some topic to provoke her good emotional experience, she will look up to the right, she'll be accessing her emotional experiences, you anchor right there. That's all I do.
Author:  DeathShredder23 [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Ok man, thanks. I won't complicate things, and I'll definitely look for the signs, but, just so I'm clear, I'm good when it comes to using both of my eyes to look into one of hers when conversing with her, correct?
Author:  JacquesMaurice [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Small but important point - whilst giving firm eye contact you should have your jaw relaxed (even to the point of having your mouth a couple of millimetres open).

A tense jaw such as with your teeth together comes across as aggression when coupled with strong eye contact. Practice in the mirror!!

And the point made about voicing conversation to her in your head is great, it really works so practice that too. You will find it also helps you open because you are practising and pre-visualising so once you do open it will be easier and your mind will already be in gear with a conversational flow.
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