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Did anything wrong or right in this text invitation?
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Author:  cracycrazy [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Did anything wrong or right in this text invitation?
I invited this HB9 to a party, she had other plans (lies i think), i negged her on flaking - I noticed a changed of mind, but it was too late to pick her up for the party. Any feeback on good points and bad points will be appreciated.

Me-hey, what are you doing this evening? i have an offer for you
HB9-Hey.I am watching an indian film this evening.what's the offer?
Me- an opportunity to socialize at interesting bday party, all inclusive food and drinks
HB- An interesting bday party'' lol. U r not bad at marketing. Well, at the moment movie sounds more attractive to me :)
Me- u r not bad at flaking :-P
HB9-What does this slang 'flaking' mean?
Me-waste of time to invite that person anywhere:-P
HB9-It was a short notice too. I am beginning to have a headache. Was doing shopping all day.
HB9-Tell me more about that bday party. i sensed change of mind, but it was too late
Me- Haha ask questions or might tell you after the experience, unless ;-).
HB9 - U already found a partner to go with? :p (shit test?)
Me-you are a grown woman, and still playing school girl games:-P
HB9-I ain't playing no games man
Me-alright, your question implied something else
Me-oh and how is the Indian film so far
HB9-Didn't go to the film
Me-ah thats explains it. what you doing instead?
HB9-Trying the clothes I bought, putting them in a different order, trying new combinations
HB9-Enjoying socialising at interesting bday party?
Me-yeah its has just got busy, only thing missing here is your ass B-)
HB9-So u don't really need me just my ass. Nice :)
Me-its figure of speech, you should know it after all this time :-P
HB9-U should have some sense of humour too ;)
Me-:-P go to sleep headache girl
Author:  96Firebird [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
Looks like she tried to escalate the conversation sexually at the end, and you didn't bite. Why not?
Author:  TheSeagull [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Did anything wrong or right in this text invitation?
Quote:
Me-you are a grown woman, and still playing school girl games:-P
HB9-I ain't playing no games man
Me-alright, your question implied something else
I do not like your reply. I would have replied something like this:
Quote:
Me-Rrrrright. How's the Indian film so far?
Quote:
HB9-So u don't really need me just my ass. Nice :)
Me-its figure of speech, you should know it after all this time :-P
HB9-U should have some sense of humour too ;)/quote]

she is right. a better reply would be
Quote:
Me-Not only your ass, hot stuff... ;)
Author:  cracycrazy [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:40 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Looks like she tried to escalate the conversation sexually at the end, and you didn't bite. Why not?
In previous texts her anti slut guard was always on, so didnt want to take it there this time - but i see your point, she seemed more forthcoming in her response
Author:  cracycrazy [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Did anything wrong or right in this text invitation?
Quote:
Me-Not only your ass, hot stuff... ;)
[/quote]

good tips - I need to more playful -
How would you have responded when she asked if "i've found a partner to go with"
I almost said, yes i am going with another girl"
Author:  TheFreshPrince [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
This one was kind of painful. You have some technique down, but aren't using your head as to when you should use it:
Quote:
HB- An interesting bday party'' lol. U r not bad at marketing. Well, at the moment movie sounds more attractive to me Smile
"Interesting bday party" is not that 'marketable' of a thing to call it, so I would take this as a full IOI. At this point, I probably would have started asking another girl to the party and figuring out what this movie was, as it was obviously important to her. (At least more important to her than you right now. If something is more important than chilling with you, it's usually a good thing to learn more about it. Ex: family, friends, things from her past, etc. are always more important.)
Quote:
Me- u r not bad at flaking Razz
HB9-What does this slang 'flaking' mean?
Me-waste of time to invite that person anywhere:-P
First off, flaking means that they already agreed to meet you somewhere, then they call it off. But even still, this whole exchange is coming off childish. This wasn't playfully teasing her, rather calling her names (that she doesn't even understand), and calling her a waste of time.
Quote:
HB9-Tell me more about that bday party. i sensed change of mind, but it was too late
Me- Haha ask questions or might tell you after the experience, unless Wink.
HB9 - U already found a partner to go with? :p (shit test?)
At this point, you're right, she seems still into you. But you're still gunning for her to tell you she wants to go. Seems desperate. And this seems to me like's simply genuinely interested in whether you already fund someone else. You could have played this a million different ways to build interest, or DHV. Instead:
Quote:
Me-you are a grown woman, and still playing school girl games:-P
Where did you get that she was playing games? because she asked you if you had a different date than her to the party? Because it sounded to me like she was looking to see if there was still a chance she could go with you, and you call that games?

Anyways, it boils down to this: Look back at your interaction. Put yourself in her shoes. Imagine:

Your buddy asks you to check out his artwork at a local art show, so you agree to go. A girl asks you out to a party, but obviously, you already agreed to the art show. So you still to go to the show with your buddy. And this girl starts calling you a waste of time. You find out your buddy just got sick, so you're now free for the evening. You ask if she's still available to party, and she says you're playing games with her. Etc.

You're starting to learn, so you're doing fine. Just write off this one experience as a learning one. For some reason I don't understand, it seems like this girl still digs you to some degree, so just move forward and keep it playful. The more you post your experiences on this forum, the more you can learn. Good luck!
Author:  TheSeagull [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Did anything wrong or right in this text invitation?
Quote:
Quote:
Me-Not only your ass, hot stuff... ;)
good tips - I need to more playful -
How would you have responded when she asked if "i've found a partner to go with"
I almost said, yes i am going with another girl"[/quote]

I like to be a playful tease. So, I would have gone for "A gentleman does not tell" :wink:
I am sure other users have different ideas.
Author:  TheFreshPrince [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 8:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
It depends on the girl. Personally, if this was a fresh, flirty girl who didn't seem to be wrapped up in a long-term exclusion (ie, not looking for you as a future boyfriend), I probably would have told her "There's always room for one more at the party. Need a ride?"

Especially with a girl I've just started gaming and don't know too well, I usually try to push and pull at the same time: 1. Always room for one more implies I have someone else there, but 2. Need a ride shows I'm interested, and willing to give her exclusive, alone-time attention.

This line also sets you up for more playfulness:

TheFreshPrince: There's always room for one more at the party. Need a ride?
HB: Yeah that sounds great!/No, that's ok.
TheFreshPrince:You're dirty girl! Not that kind of ride. I meant in my car.

Then she's thinking that maybe she implied "ride" as sex, and came off too enthusiastically. Plus, after you equate "ride" with "sex", you talk about the ride being in your car, so she's thinking about sex in your car.

I'm sure you can improve this, I just did it on the fly. But that's what it's all about: Be playful spontaneously.


Edit: Saying you were with another girl is ok. But I personally wouldn't do that with someone who's not fully comfortable with me, as she may register it as rejection, or blow off. Plus, I make it a point to always be honest with chicks. The above, I think, is indirect enough to create the same amount of attraction, but still be playful, and carry on the conversation.
Author:  cracycrazy [ Mon Jul 23, 2012 9:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the tips players, playfull push and pull seems to be the missing point in my game. I will practice some more.

I thought she was playing games because she changed her mind when it was too late, it could have been for any reason other than her playing games. (shouldnt neg too much)
I didnt answer her about going with someone else intentionally (it seems silence is NOT better than saying something indirect for her think about)
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