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How to come off as confident but not arrogant?
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Author:  silver33 [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 11:42 am ]
Post subject:  How to come off as confident but not arrogant?
Thin line, help out.
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 12:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Its about how the other person feels about the things you say...
Author:  DUbL-eS [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 12:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Arrogance is when you feel like others are beneath you, and go out of your way to be an asshole. (Definition: Having or revealing an exaggerated sense of one's own importance or abilities.)

Confidence is when you don't care about what other people think of you, instead you care more about what you think of you. It's all about finding your center. A big part of confidence is to find inner validation instead of looking for validation from others. Reaction-seeking-behavior and attention-seeking-behavior shows poor confidence.

Cocky/Funny might come off as slightly arrogant, but the easiest way for me to deal with that is to minimize the cockyness when I feel like I am reaching the threshold.

Just my 2 cents :)
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 12:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
Some people like Lebron. Some people hate Lebron. Some People like Kobe. Some people hate Kobe. . .Laker fans probably will say he is just confident, non laker fans will probably say he is arrogant.

When a girl likes you, she'll generally rationalize your behaviors in a positive light...

You can actually test this out your self. Get a girl to develop a strong feeling for you. Then purposely start acting "arrogant" and see how much she will put up with.
Author:  silver33 [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 12:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
So yeah, perception is key. How does one build that perception accurately, more importantly how does one maintain a perception of confidence without it appearing to be arrogance?
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 1:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
Its not about perception....Talk to the girl and listen to want she wants. Ask questions, learn about her. As she develop stronger and stronger feelings for you, as she acquires a taste for you, she will see more of your actions in a positive light.

As far as perception, Now you can always rephrase your actions. for example: Its not bragging, its true. You can reframe the situation, but this will only work if she does not have strong feelings (negative feelings against whatever you are doing)
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 1:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
However, at the end of the day you should not care too much about this

You want to be a stand up guy with that HATE IT OR LOVE IT QUALITY.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuMBmK5uksg
Author:  agentprovocateur [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 6:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
However, at the end of the day you should not care too much about this

You want to be a stand up guy with that HATE IT OR LOVE IT QUALITY.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuMBmK5uksg
Just when I thought you took whackery to a new low, you somehow manage to take it even lower.
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 6:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
However, at the end of the day you should not care too much about this

You want to be a stand up guy with that HATE IT OR LOVE IT QUALITY.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuMBmK5uksg
Just when I thought you took whackery to a new low, you somehow manage to take it even lower.
Say something productive, don't troll
Author:  daffy duck [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
Confidence:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NaNPPqZ8nxQ[/youtube]

Arrogance:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJPesST-skg[/youtube]
Author:  agentprovocateur [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
One of the main distinctions between arrogance and confidence is that with the former, individuals boast of traits and/or abilities that they do not posses. That said, an accomplished individual who gloats, wearing his achievements as a badge of honor for the entire world to see comes forth as having to compensate for deep-rooted insecurities/feelings of inadequacy.

Being confident and humble are very attractive styles of presentation, whereas boasting of past glories and future conquests serve as indicators that you're masking your personal shortcomings; sure people may not immediately be aware of what those insecurities may be, but they will generally get an intuitive sense that something is awry. It is typically gold-digger women who will prey upon such people, as the arrogant man is fearful of revealing his true personality to others for fear of disapproval, consequently his behavior can come across as erratic - highly reactive at times (particularly when his ego feels threatened) and at other times seemingly detached. However, so long as he caters to the vacuous, materialist woman's desires he will feel he has a place.
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
I think he was imitating The Prince: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28z0RyCY29c
Author:  daffy duck [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:24 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I think he was imitating The Prince: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28z0RyCY29c
yeah, prince certainly talked the talk but at least he had the skills to walk the walk...lol

still makes me laugh some of those fights. the sheer nerve of that guy...:-)
Author:  IwantEasyLove [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
One of the main distinctions between arrogance and confidence is that with the former, individuals boast of traits and/or abilities that they do not posses. That said, an accomplished individual who gloats, wearing his achievements as a badge of honor for the entire world to see comes forth as having to compensate for deep-rooted insecurities/feelings of inadequacy.

Being confident and humble are very attractive styles of presentation, whereas boasting of past glories and future conquests serve as indicators that you're masking your personal shortcomings; sure people may not immediately be aware of what those insecurities may be, but they will generally get an intuitive sense that something is awry. It is typically gold-digger women who will prey upon such people, as the arrogant man is fearful of revealing his true personality to others for fear of disapproval, consequently his behavior can come across as erratic - highly reactive at times (particularly when his ego feels threatened) and at other times seemingly detached.
Agent Provocatuer does not know a damn thing


1.) By boasting you give the impression of greatness and you can impose this image upon other by saying it so much.

2.) It does not merely mask or hide insecurities. It actually changes how you feel and makes you confident. But y'all don't know nothing about that...

3.) you are supposed to react when people disrespect you or slander you.

Image

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOiXrlw0 ... OiXrlw0oZc[/img]
Author:  agentprovocateur [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
One of the main distinctions between arrogance and confidence is that with the former, individuals boast of traits and/or abilities that they do not posses. That said, an accomplished individual who gloats, wearing his achievements as a badge of honor for the entire world to see comes forth as having to compensate for deep-rooted insecurities/feelings of inadequacy.

Being confident and humble are very attractive styles of presentation, whereas boasting of past glories and future conquests serve as indicators that you're masking your personal shortcomings; sure people may not immediately be aware of what those insecurities may be, but they will generally get an intuitive sense that something is awry. It is typically gold-digger women who will prey upon such people, as the arrogant man is fearful of revealing his true personality to others for fear of disapproval, consequently his behavior can come across as erratic - highly reactive at times (particularly when his ego feels threatened) and at other times seemingly detached.
Agent Provocatuer does not know a damn thing


1.) By boasting you give the impression of greatness and you can impose this image upon other by saying it so much.

2.) It does not merely mask or hide insecurities. It actually changes how you feel and makes you confident. But y'all don't know nothing about that...

3.) you are supposed to react when people disrespect you or slander you.

Image

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOiXrlw0 ... OiXrlw0oZc[/img]
"By boasting you give the impression of greatness and you can impose this image upon other by saying it so much."
Boasting never wins admiration nor respect. If history has taught us anything its that arrogant, often haughty leaders ruled by show of force. Compliance was gained through threat of violence, not through admiration and respect. Being boastful is a cue for over compensating for a perceived, or real lack of something, whatever that may be. Being boastful in the pickup world serves as a detriment to a man's game, that is unless he is pursuing a merely physical relationship with a woman who in turn wants something equally superficial in return - a mirror for each others sense of vanity, nothing more.

With regard to confidence, this is something that can only come from within. By building an awareness of one's values, becoming competent in various areas, one will progressively gain a sense of efficacy and confidence. Confidence in itself does not come out of affirmations, but rather a self-assuredness that can only come through experience and perseverance.

When people slander, or spew vitriol at you, the motivation behind the behavior is to manipulate, or goad others into reacting. Secure people don't feel the need to engage in disrespectful behavior there's a proactive way to respond (assertiveness), and a reactive/maladaptive way to respond (to aggress). To state that one is "supposed to react when people disrespect you or slander you" is the very belief that gets people in trouble (I see it all the time, I have numerous clients who are contending with anger issues simply because this is their modus operandi when dealing with others).

Looking at the 3 statements you'd made in response to my post, it is to no surprise why you've received such a poor reception on here, and likely with the women you're meeting as well.
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