PUA Forum :: Lack of experience is killing me

ok cool, so you have figured out you want a girlfriend, so why exactly would you like a girlfriend?

what sort of a girlfriend would you like?

what have you done so far for yourself in order to meet your goal?

Started in the same place. Couple of things.

-Work on tweaking your personality into the type of guy that people like to hang out with. This is a long process. From what you posted about yourself, is gonna be real hard for and is gonna take couple of years. But is possible. I started shy as fuck and in the same boat.

-Be more social. Start conversation with people in your class. You be surprise how cool people can be.

-Try free online dating site.

-Important: Accept failure as part of the process and learn from it. The more your willing to fail and not care at all, the faster your progress is gonna be. This includes all the way from opening a girl to having sex with her. Your gonna mess up a lot every step of the way. Your first time kissing, sex, date, etc...

Here is a quote from Thomas J Watson, founder of IBM

“Would you like me to give you a formula for... success? It's quite simple, really. Double your rate of failure. You're thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn't at all... you can be discouraged by failure / or you can learn from it. So go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because, remember that's where you'll find success. On the far side.”

1. For the experience of a relationship, I am foreign to intimacy from the opposite sex.

2. A girl who is friendly, attractive, and easygoing.

3. You got me there, I generally have been trying to make myself more social but I tend to be nit picky of who I have a conversation with. Also I tried a cold approach but my nervousness I feel was very apparent to the girl I was attempting to approach so she physically turned her back to me and walked away. I guess the reason I haven't done another cold approach is because of that and the way I felt at the time. From now on I am going to try to increase my approach rate and make myself less shy and more social.

Quote:

1. For the experience of a relationship, I am foreign to intimacy from the opposite sex.

cool man, is it the companionship, or the physical relationship you seek the most, what exactly are your expectations surrounding your ideal relationship?

Quote:

2. A girl who is friendly, attractive, and easygoing.

that's an interesting list, I love friendly people too, but exactly what is it about friendly attractive and easy going people that makes you want to form a connection with them?, how exactly do you know when someone is both friendly and easy going as well as attractive? are you sure this is truly what you want out of a partner, or is this simply what you are willing to settle for?

Quote:

awesome man, you want to experience new relationships, talking to new people and learning to relate to them and connect is a great place to start, have you by any chance set any specific goals for yourself to reach or kept track of yourself with a journal or some form of planner or something? what goal exactly do you want to accomplish, and what steps could you take to accomplish that goal? how can you challenge your goals to improve them and push yourself?

Author:	The_Inferno [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 6:39 am ]
Post subject:	Lack of experience is killing me
It has been far too long for me to not have had experience with a girl. I feel as if it is starting to change me and subtract from my quality of life. I still have not had my first kiss. The only source of girls I have is from my community college and it is very hard to establish a social circle there. My views of girls has kind of become distorted and I am not sure how to go about getting them. Will someone please help me wipe the slate clean and tell me a detailed path or skill set I should learn to overall get a girlfriend?

Author:	DUbL-eS [ Sat Jun 23, 2012 8:37 am ]
Post subject:
We're in the same boat homie. The best way to overcome this (and it's working for me RIGHT NOW) is to go out and meet people. The more you do it, the easier it gets. Here's some videos you can torrent... err I mean watch Annihilation Method by Style (Neil Strauss) Project Hollywood by Mystery Real Social Dynamics - The Blueprint Decoded (Natural Game via Tyler Durden) There's a book called The Game and the 30 day lifestyle challenge that are chilling on the shelf at your local Barnes & Noble RIGHT NOW! If you have any questions, feel free to PM me.

Author:	The_Inferno [ Mon Jun 25, 2012 9:25 pm ]
Post subject:
Thanks for your help DUbL-eS. I look forward to a good read.

Author:	0uch [ Mon Jun 25, 2012 10:21 pm ]
Post subject:
Started in the same place. Couple of things. -Work on tweaking your personality into the type of guy that people like to hang out with. This is a long process. From what you posted about yourself, is gonna be real hard for and is gonna take couple of years. But is possible. I started shy as fuck and in the same boat. -Be more social. Start conversation with people in your class. You be surprise how cool people can be. -Try free online dating site. -Important: Accept failure as part of the process and learn from it. The more your willing to fail and not care at all, the faster your progress is gonna be. This includes all the way from opening a girl to having sex with her. Your gonna mess up a lot every step of the way. Your first time kissing, sex, date, etc... Here is a quote from Thomas J Watson, founder of IBM “Would you like me to give you a formula for... success? It's quite simple, really. Double your rate of failure. You're thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn't at all... you can be discouraged by failure / or you can learn from it. So go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because, remember that's where you'll find success. On the far side.”

Author:	pumpington [ Mon Jun 25, 2012 10:31 pm ]
Post subject:
ok cool, so you have figured out you want a girlfriend, so why exactly would you like a girlfriend? what sort of a girlfriend would you like? what have you done so far for yourself in order to meet your goal?

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Author:	The_Inferno [ Tue Jun 26, 2012 2:06 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: ok cool, so you have figured out you want a girlfriend, so why exactly would you like a girlfriend? what sort of a girlfriend would you like? what have you done so far for yourself in order to meet your goal? 1. For the experience of a relationship, I am foreign to intimacy from the opposite sex. 2. A girl who is friendly, attractive, and easygoing. 3. You got me there, I generally have been trying to make myself more social but I tend to be nit picky of who I have a conversation with. Also I tried a cold approach but my nervousness I feel was very apparent to the girl I was attempting to approach so she physically turned her back to me and walked away. I guess the reason I haven't done another cold approach is because of that and the way I felt at the time. From now on I am going to try to increase my approach rate and make myself less shy and more social.

Author:	The_Inferno [ Tue Jun 26, 2012 2:07 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Started in the same place. Couple of things. -Work on tweaking your personality into the type of guy that people like to hang out with. This is a long process. From what you posted about yourself, is gonna be real hard for and is gonna take couple of years. But is possible. I started shy as fuck and in the same boat. -Be more social. Start conversation with people in your class. You be surprise how cool people can be. -Try free online dating site. -Important: Accept failure as part of the process and learn from it. The more your willing to fail and not care at all, the faster your progress is gonna be. This includes all the way from opening a girl to having sex with her. Your gonna mess up a lot every step of the way. Your first time kissing, sex, date, etc... Here is a quote from Thomas J Watson, founder of IBM “Would you like me to give you a formula for... success? It's quite simple, really. Double your rate of failure. You're thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn't at all... you can be discouraged by failure / or you can learn from it. So go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because, remember that's where you'll find success. On the far side.” The quote at the bottom holds true. Thanks for the advice.

Author:	pumpington [ Tue Jun 26, 2012 2:58 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: 1. For the experience of a relationship, I am foreign to intimacy from the opposite sex. cool man, is it the companionship, or the physical relationship you seek the most, what exactly are your expectations surrounding your ideal relationship? Quote: 2. A girl who is friendly, attractive, and easygoing. that's an interesting list, I love friendly people too, but exactly what is it about friendly attractive and easy going people that makes you want to form a connection with them?, how exactly do you know when someone is both friendly and easy going as well as attractive? are you sure this is truly what you want out of a partner, or is this simply what you are willing to settle for? Quote: 3. You got me there, I generally have been trying to make myself more social but I tend to be nit picky of who I have a conversation with. Also I tried a cold approach but my nervousness I feel was very apparent to the girl I was attempting to approach so she physically turned her back to me and walked away. I guess the reason I haven't done another cold approach is because of that and the way I felt at the time. From now on I am going to try to increase my approach rate and make myself less shy and more social. awesome man, you want to experience new relationships, talking to new people and learning to relate to them and connect is a great place to start, have you by any chance set any specific goals for yourself to reach or kept track of yourself with a journal or some form of planner or something? what goal exactly do you want to accomplish, and what steps could you take to accomplish that goal? how can you challenge your goals to improve them and push yourself?

Author:	looper [ Tue Jun 26, 2012 3:03 am ]
Post subject:
Hey Broseph Stalin, I feel you holmes. Had a chance to fuck this hot ass bitch who's had sex 40+ times, but turned it down due to being a lameass who hasn't even kissed a girl just to save myself humiliation. Because, like, I'd pull out my dick and it would fall off or spaghetti would fall out of my pockets. Some shit. So just know you're not alone. Also cocks. And don't drink and drive.

Author:	The_Inferno [ Tue Jun 26, 2012 10:09 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: 1. For the experience of a relationship, I am foreign to intimacy from the opposite sex. cool man, is it the companionship, or the physical relationship you seek the most, what exactly are your expectations surrounding your ideal relationship? Quote: 2. A girl who is friendly, attractive, and easygoing. that's an interesting list, I love friendly people too, but exactly what is it about friendly attractive and easy going people that makes you want to form a connection with them?, how exactly do you know when someone is both friendly and easy going as well as attractive? are you sure this is truly what you want out of a partner, or is this simply what you are willing to settle for? Quote: 3. You got me there, I generally have been trying to make myself more social but I tend to be nit picky of who I have a conversation with. Also I tried a cold approach but my nervousness I feel was very apparent to the girl I was attempting to approach so she physically turned her back to me and walked away. I guess the reason I haven't done another cold approach is because of that and the way I felt at the time. From now on I am going to try to increase my approach rate and make myself less shy and more social. awesome man, you want to experience new relationships, talking to new people and learning to relate to them and connect is a great place to start, have you by any chance set any specific goals for yourself to reach or kept track of yourself with a journal or some form of planner or something? what goal exactly do you want to accomplish, and what steps could you take to accomplish that goal? how can you challenge your goals to improve them and push yourself? 1A. The physical relationship is what I am dying to try but the reality of it is that the companionship part will hold much more value in the long run. As far as my expectations go I would just like a girl that is interesting and "lights my fire" or so to speak. I have had girls like me before but very few actually "light my fire". 2A. Friendliness is pretty much discovered when I watch her social interactions. The attractive part I will know when I get the feeling from seeing her. As for the easy going part it will ultimately be bonus points but will not ultimately make or break the relationship. 3A. This is where you got me again. I ultimately haven't set/thought of any clear concise goals with women. I want to change myself to be able to create a situation where if I see a girl in my class I will be able to successfully start a relationship with her.

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