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F-closed a hb9.5 then got the ljbf speach...HELP!
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Author:  Saul Good [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 2:09 am ]
Post subject:  F-closed a hb9.5 then got the ljbf speach...HELP!
So I've been working this 21 yr old aspiring actress/model for about 3-4 weeks and finally f closed her last week. we banged on Tuesday and it was only ok partly cause she had her mom's car and had to bring it back that night 40 mins away. I didnt see her again until the following saturday when i picked her up and she slept over. That night we had pretty ridiculous sex. So good she said it scared her. I meen its 5 days later and u can still see a faded mark on my chest/shoulder area that i got from her sucking/biting me. The following day she gave me this shpeal about how she should be in ny/la and is crazy about me and how shes gonna get attached real soon and cant let that happen so therefore just wants to be friends. She said if she's with me that it will affect her decision making. To this I said slow down I've only known u for a month and by no meens am i just going to become ur boyfriend. I thought that was slick and i basically continued to agree with her in a freeze out fashion. The only thing i question is that i said the 2 of us r a recipe for disastor, was that too extreme? Anyways i had a gig this past tuesday and she came to see me with some of her friends. I was playing when she got in and she said when ur done u owe me a hug to which i looked at her and said "we'll see" it came over very smooth. After i finished some people gave me some respect then i went over to say hi to her. She kinda had the doggy dinner bowl look goin on so i said come here and she gave me a big hug. I remember her telling me how crazy attracted to me she was but how we also have so much in common. I forgot what i said but i was being smooth so much that she grabbed me and sucked on my neck for a split second. So I could def use some advice on how to proceed from here. What kind of tactics can i employ? I was thinking of proposing that we bang just one more time because it ended so abruptly, and theres this left over tension. idk what do u think?
Author:  MrMike79 [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 2:17 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
So good she said it scared her.
No she wasn't. That happens to you all the time. See?

Quote:
5 days later and u can still see a faded mark on my chest/shoulder area that i got from her sucking/biting me.
Biggest test of all time. You fucking failed. "Sorry, that is hot and feels amazing, but please no marks." Why? Because you have so many fucking woman, that all of them would do that if you didn't tell them to stop. See?
Quote:
2 of us r a recipe for disastor
That was a dick thing to say. Girls don't like dicks. She got emotional and vulnerable with you, and you shut her down and make her feel like shit. Boys do that. You just showed her you are an immature piece of shit - not a confident man.


So your question is where do you go from here? First, get some fake self-esteem, act like a man, not an insecure boy, and talk to her like an actual human being. Show some emotions. Don't lead her on, but UNDERSTAND her and what she is feeling. She obviously likes you, so why would you want to fuck her once more? The goal is to keep fucking her many times until you are tired of her. You need "on-demand" girls.

What happens when a first meetup blows you out 1 hour before? Call one of your 5-6 "on-demand" girls who will drop everything to come out with you and give you great sex.
Author:  Saul Good [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 5:18 am ]
Post subject: 
MrMike thanks for the quick response, a little harsh wording, but i can take it, let me explain a couple things
Quote:
Quote:
So good she said it scared her.
Quote:
No she wasn't. That happens to you all the time. See?
- im not sure i get u here, r u saying i should have asked her if this happens to her all the time?

Quote:
5 days later and u can still see a faded mark on my chest/shoulder area that i got from her sucking/biting me.
Quote:
Biggest test of all time. You fucking failed. "Sorry, that is hot and feels amazing, but please no marks." Why? Because you have so many fucking woman, that all of them would do that if you didn't tell them to stop. See?
-very good point i like this a lot - to be honest with u i havent had a mark in years i think she just bit the fuck out of me real fast, and i bruised before i could man handle her off of me - she's a freak, and said she once scarred a bf
Quote:
2 of us r a recipe for disastor
Quote:
That was a dick thing to say. Girls don't like dicks. She got emotional and vulnerable with you, and you shut her down and make her feel like shit. Boys do that. You just showed her you are an immature piece of shit - not a confident man.


-very good point again, the reason i said this is because we both promote edm and travel in the same circles - i was trying to agree and get on her level, i suppose this is where i went wrong and really should have controlled the frame - do u have any advice on this i really dont know anything about nlp but am very interested

Quote:
Don't lead her on, but UNDERSTAND her and what she is feeling.
- how am i leading her on?

Based on ur advice here i am thinking of texting or calling her in a genuine way and just talking to her about what she's going through, but won't this just make me slide further down the ljbf zone? what do i say when she tells me she crazy about me, really attracted to me, and is worried about falling for me? what do i say when she says she should be in ny/la?
Author:  CaptainJackHarkness [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 6:27 am ]
Post subject: 
The ego in this thread wreaks. My friend, a real PUA knows when to cut the bullshit, and everything from this thread wreaks of outcome dependency. I don't blame the girl for LJBF'ing you because even I'm not buying this "cool guy" shtick you're trying to give her of "letss seee"

Dude she's not a fucking idiot. Or maybe she is, but I think she played you good. You are not a special snowflake or that Zeus in bed that no other guy can do. It's just the circumstances which are the problem and you just have to learn to move on player. Keep playing the game.
Author:  Saul Good [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 6:44 am ]
Post subject: 
jack i appreciate the support and input but i disagree with u. i like mike's idea of making this into a situation where im her boston guy and shes part of my stable. Further more i have moved on and am continuing to approach women and make moves. She wants me and when she sees me out at the club talking to other girls its gonna make her jealous and want me more......right??[/quote]
Author:  CaptainJackHarkness [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 7:38 am ]
Post subject: 
Outcome dependency wreaks. Like I said she could be stupid enough to believe it if she's spewing this BS about how you're soooo attractive and the sex "Scared her" but I'm going to question as to how many times she has actually had that much sex (ding dong).

Yet again I think she's just stringing you along but I also think she likes this tussle bullshit. One thing is for sure: if she keeps up this mentality in Hollywood, she's not going to go far as an actress. LOL
Author:  Saul Good [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 8:56 am ]
Post subject: 
how do i reek of outcome dependency when i agreed with her and supported her? I told her the last thing i ever want in a relationship is whats called buyer's remorse. I told her she's beautiful and could def make it as a model, and i would hate for her to ever resent me. For the foreseeable future I will be staying where im at. I do well here and it would take a hell of an opportunity to pull me away from everything i have going on here. She probably sees this and im wondering if this is also part of the problem
Author:  Monsignor Crisanto [ Tue Jun 12, 2012 10:39 am ]
Post subject: 
Out of the many posters here who seek for help or advice, you're one of the few who detail the nonverbal side of the situation. As many scientific studies say, face-to-face human interaction consists mainly of nonverbal cues rather than verbal communication. Or to put it in standard PUA lingo, judge the situation with what a woman does and not what she says.

We really don't know why she's so horny about you. It might be that your dick has a wider girth than the average guy, or you fuck like a tiger with the humping speed of a cheetah, or you have the stamina and strength of an ant. Whatever, judge what she's doing and not what she's saying.

The nonverbal signs indicate that she's still super horny about you. Therefore, make her hornier. Don't worry about what to say, let your dick be the guide. The cock will know what to do. Besides, do you ever fucking believe what she says when you're banging her and she calls you, "God" or "Jesus Christ" hmm? I don't think so. :twisted:
Author:  vcwriter [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 4:20 am ]
Post subject: 
Dude you're playing it really well. Some idiots would over react and think they have to lock it down and demand a relationship. Other idiots would try to act "alpha" and say "fine fuck you I don't need you". The strongest thing is to not react at all, and keep doing your thing. That's what you did.

Don't blow it by issuing ultimatums or trying to romance her. Just be you. Put yourself right in front of her, completely "over" her because you have other girls in your life. When she starts worrying that you might not be interested, she won't last 5 minutes without trying to suck on your neck again.

You know what to do after that.
Author:  Saul Good [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 12:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Here's a text msg exchange i had with her last friday after she cancelled plans we had on sat, plans we had for about 2-3 weeks in advance

her: About that....I have some super bad news (blah blah blah) ....
staurday night :-( I'm so pissed, she just told me today. I'm really sorry

me: Oh. Wow that sucks

her: :-( Yeah I'm so pissed I was mad excited to see the place not to mention we got to look awesome for it. :-( Any girl would love to go with u tho so I dout u will have any problem finding a fellow cave woman (theme party)

me: Oh yeah girls love to hear that and think they're 2nd choice


her: You don't have to tell them their the 2nd choice and plus I mean its not like I can get out of my cousins graduation :-(

me: Its so last minute i think most would be able to fill in the blanks. But i understand family comes first. Im still pissed though. Make it up to me. Come over tonight and lets beat each other up. My mark finally faded and i could use a new one

her: I would but I have plans for wine and cheese with melissa before she leaves this weekend :-( please don't. Hate me its just a mad busy weekend

me: Kind of hard not to now. Sunday night. Me. U. Passionate hate sex

her: Spades we talked about this.....

me: Well i cant help it if u still want it

her: Well I also have fantastic control

me: We'll see....

how do u guys think i did?
Author:  JuanAntonioB [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 1:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
i dont get the timeline here. was this before or after she gave you the LJBF talk?

anyways in these texts you kinda seem desperate to fuck. the less sex you demand, the more you get imo.

just as long as you continue making her wet as fuck in each interaction she has with u
Author:  Saul Good [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 1:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
this was after the ljbf speach
Quote:
in these texts you kinda seem desperate to fuck. the less sex you demand, the more you get imo.
good point, i prob was desperate to fuck, i've been experimenting with trying to masturbate less lately and having mixed results - like i might have more motivation but then shit like this slips, idk if i should go back to my 1-2x per day routine or what
Author:  Crypto [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 1:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
It is funny that you actually think you are gaming her!!! She is the one dangling the string here...You should go back and read CaptainJack's Posts again Bro! But before you do, OPEN your mind, and close your Ego!

Tough Love at it's finest = CaptainJack's suggestions!


Peace...
Author:  vcwriter [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 5:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
me: Its so last minute i think most would be able to fill in the blanks. But i understand family comes first. Im still pissed though. Make it up to me. Come over tonight and lets beat each other up. My mark finally faded and i could use a new one

her: I would but I have plans for wine and cheese with melissa before she leaves this weekend :-( please don't. Hate me its just a mad busy weekend

me: Kind of hard not to now. Sunday night. Me. U. Passionate hate sex

her: Spades we talked about this.....

me: Well i cant help it if u still want it

her: Well I also have fantastic control

me: We'll see....

how do u guys think i did?
I don't like it.

There's some guys who are obsessed with being "alpha", so trying to "show a girl who's boss" will make her respect you. What they don't realize is that anyone with any kind of power doesn't let shit like this get to them. If you're an attractive guy with a lot of girls in your life, you'd never be "pissed" that a girl did anything (unless you're actually in a relationship). Getting pissed is stupid. Demanding sex in the next breath sounds needy and insecure.

You were doing a lot better when you were just relaxed about everything. Now you've gone from the smooth guy who has a lot of sex to the desperate guy who needs sex from her, and the creepy guy who won't leave her alone. I mean, it's only one interaction, and it's possible she has a better impression of you than your last interaction. But don't do that shit again, IMO.

See her casually. Less planned dates. More group things. More spontaneous 'hey I'm in the area' type of things. More random texts about nothing.

Flirt with her, but act like you've moved on, and you're just friends.

The mixed signals will drive her crazy, like a string in front of a cat just out of her reach. When she can't take it anymore, you know what to do.
Author:  Saul Good [ Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Flirt with her, but act like you've moved on, and you're just friends. The mixed signals will drive her crazy, like a string in front of a cat just out of her reach. When she can't take it anymore, you know what to do.
well spoken, solid advice, this was basically my plan. The only reason i strayed is because i remember her telling me once that i seemed too cool and unaffected, so i figured canceling on someone to an invite only party the night before when we were planning this for 2-3 weeks was a good time to show her a little emotion. Did it backfire? yeah it seems a little bit. This past sunday she came to my weekly club night and when she walked in i was talking with someone so i kind of nodded then turned back to my conversation - she didnt come over - later on i was on the dancefloor and she came near me so i shot her a cute look then we both met half way and started to playfully wrestle and she playfully hit me a bit as she does. it wasnt a bad interaction, but not great either, idk if it was just straight tension or what. but next thing i know we r surrounded by friends so i slip my goggles (Mystery style :)) over my eyes and everyone kinda started to dance. i had to go on stage to check on my talent and the sound at which point it was near the end of the night so i had to stay on stage and set down. She left without saying good bye and i havent heard from her since. Im not thinking too much into it cause one of her friends looked real f-ed up and needed help but still......when theres a will theres a way right?
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