Quote: Hey guys. Brand new here. I'll start with a brief intro.
I am 20 years old, still a virgin, and desperately lacking in confidence. I had a rough childhood that I won't get into, but to be blunt, it left me with terrible social anxiety. I never talk to girls, and freeze up completely with anyone I believe to be good looking. I work out a ton, and am in great shape. This helps somewhat with my confidence but not much.
The first positive sign I see is you work out. This is good news. It means you *do* care about yourself. Keep it up.
Quote: I am incredibly depressed.
I have been there, bro. A lot of people have. About 25% of the human population will suffer from real clinical depression at some point in their lives. This means there are even some hb's out there who are depressed.
After I have gotten to know some women I told them about my history of severe depression. Some of them were shocked -- they were like "I cannot see YOU having any sort of problems like that." My point is the thoughts you think about yourself are *not* always indicative of how other people perceive you. You cannot always judge a book by it's cover.
But, seriously, if you feel depressed you should seek professional help. I have and many other people do everyday. There's nothing whatsoever wrong with it. I also had severe self-image issues, even though most people consider me a good looking guy. All of those pernicious thoughts enter my mind at times (you are ugly, you are stupid, you don't fit in, etc.) A confidence booster can really help overcome some of these things (something in life you have succeeded at can really give you a boost). Once your brain sees real results that contradict it's negative thoughts, it will be easier for you to begin to see improvements in your mood.
Quote: I feel like if I can't get over my issues and form some relationships with women there is no point in being alive. Can someone please tell me where I can start, books I can read, videos I can watch, ANYTHING. I am in desperate need of help. Feel free to ask me any questions. Thanks.
You shouldn't worry about women at this moment. If you are wanting a woman to fix you, you will be in for a rude awakening. It is best to achieve confidence and success in some other part of your life *first*.
But trust me, I understand exactly how you feel. I also have been in the position of wanting a woman there with me, but I know it just wouldn't fix any underlying issues. It might give me a temporary confidence boost that I landed her, but it doesn't fix any of the deeper issues.
Again, I suggest finding a professional to talk to about this. Medication works well for a lot of people too. I know some people in my life who I would have *never* thought had any issues who I found out later are on Prozac. Asking for a professional can be the first step on the road to recovery and success. From there it is a matter of changing those negative thoughts into positive ones -- reversing the process if you will.
And let me just add -- you are still young, only 20. That is a kid in my book. Once you get laid for the first time, you will suddenly feel a lot better. Not saying it will fix all your problems, but it could be a confidence booster. But, again, this is not to say you should go out seeking women to fix you. That wont work. What if she decides to break it off with you? If you are the type of guy who gets destroyed by this, it could be bad. This is why you need to develop your "I don't give a fuck" attitude first. Every "player" has that.
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