PUA Forum
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

Shit test or not interested?
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=136390		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  daffy duck [ Sun May 20, 2012 11:52 am ]
Post subject:  Shit test or not interested?
The following is an online exchange.

Me: Hey, you are very attractive. Do you have a personality to match?

Her: Erm, no. I'm just a pretty face.

Me: Lol. That's exactly what Alessandra Ambrosia said to me when I worked with her on one of the Next ad campaigns. Turns out she wasn't kidding. :-) What kind of field do you do your make-up artistry in?

No response.

Many hours later.

Me: Geez, your no fun at all. I thought at least you'd have some smart ass come back but no, nothing...

Her: Shouldn't you be in bed young boy?

Me: I'm 5 years older than you! And yes, for your information I am in bed. How long are you going to be?

No response. Yet.

So. Do you think her responses are IOI's or not? Are the lack of responses possible shit tests or IODs?

It's hard to tell sometimes. What do you think?
Author:  daffy duck [ Sun May 20, 2012 12:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Here's another online exchange:

Me: You look awfully like Glenn Close from Fatal Attraction. Should I be scared?

Her: That's rather insulting.

Me: Would you prefer I'd said Glenn Close from Dangerous Liaisons? Although I don't think she comes off too well in that either.

No response.

I'm thinking no response in general might mean not interested? Or do they want me to chase?
Author:  narcisse [ Sun May 20, 2012 12:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Dude I think your game's good (cocky funny, original, etc...) so if she doesn't answer she's not interested, and she clearly don't desearve you :wink:
Author:  pumpington [ Sun May 20, 2012 12:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
she is getting testy, but you can't tell at this point, however try to field test this idea for yourself

next time when you get bad behavior from a girl, don't try to ''qualify'' yourself to get her approval, instead dis-qualify her or just break rapport in general for having bad behavior, essentially you want to break the rapport because she is fucking with your vibe, you want to fuck her vibe up, be more confident then her and lead, you are the main boss of this shit, you run this thing, you are getting to know her to see if she is good enough, not trying to tell her you are good enough and every now and then asking fake questions to get her to qualify when by the frame you have set, you are in-fact qualifying

think in terms of the personality you are interacting with, forget how she looks and pay attention to how she acts,

good behavior = reward with positive attention, and stories and interest in her
bad behavior = punish with rapport breaks and withdrawing your attention

example of a rapport break:
Me: Hey, you are very attractive. Do you have a personality to match?
Her: Erm, no. I'm just a pretty face.
Me: Good, I like em dumb and boring and good looking, tell me something that won't interest me so we can make this quick and I can block you

or

Me: Hey, you are very attractive. Do you have a personality to match?
Her: Erm, no. I'm just a pretty face.
Me: Alright well I'm not into boring girls that can't have fun and just work on being pretty, have a good night and I liked your profile (don't re-intiate just let her come to you, if she doesn't she was just being rude and is not interested)


when you dis-qualify a girl, or break rapport, make damn sure it is fucking socially intelligent to do so, trying to insult people for reactions will not make you a popular person, that you can guarentee, the second interaction was just clearly a small social mis-calibration, don't insult or negatively validate a girl until you have at least some form of hook in place, it is like walking up to someone you don't know and saying hey, you're ugly, it's better it just play it by behavior, be positive until you have a reason not to be, then put up a boundry and wear your damn pants, don't let people walk over your boundries, show some self respect without being socially retarded and trying to impose your boundries on everyone,

girls are usually for the most part over sensative and insecure in general, even when they put on the tough girl alpha bitch act, it's all smoke and mirrors, trying to break rapport on someone you don't know won't work unless they are extremely secure and confident within themselves, and chances are you will get teased right back by that kind of person with absolutely no emotional reaction from their end or ignored to the fullest

also try to re-frame from being needy, know that you can walk away at any time, when a girl is shutting you down, just shut her down and walk away, once again self respect, why would you plow after someone with a bunch of flowers, hearts and sunshine when that person is throwing shit at your face
Author:  daffy duck [ Sun May 20, 2012 12:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
thanks guys. :D
Author:  Fvckitimout [ Sun May 20, 2012 12:40 pm ]
Post subject: 
Ive tried online gaming and its terrible. Had some success but its too much time and effort. And women are often too bitchy because online, they are goddesses.

Open rates are low, so you shouldnt over analyze every single failed approach.
Author:  Hoopz000 [ Mon May 21, 2012 5:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
This exchange is exactly why I hate online cold-gaming. You can't read any sort of body language or vocal tonality to get an idea where she's coming from with these responses, and most girls that can be gamed in person won't necessarily be gamed by a random guy over the internet (i.e. you could say the EXACT same stuff in person or via IM, and the in person pickup could work where as over IM it has no chance).

In all honesty she doesn't seem interested though. Very little thought in the responses, ignores you half the time and when she responds she makes it quick to sort of try and brush you away as quickly as possible.

I'd say on to the next one good sir.
Author:  seph89 [ Mon May 21, 2012 5:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
You're coming off too needy. If it's obvious to me then it's definitely going to be obvious to her.

Arash Dibazar, my mentor, would say to never seek out approval, which is what comes off in your exchange with her. Say your bit then move on. Do not WAIT on a reaction.

Remember, you are not dependent on HER. You validate YOURSELF. That's the attitude you need to have.

And no, there were no IOI's in her dialogue. If anything there was some annoyance behind it.
Author:  daffy duck [ Mon May 21, 2012 5:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
Yes, its hard to guage. i'm assuming when women dont reply at all that they are not interested. so when they do reply (even with an insult) it makes me wonder if they are interested or just testing...

it's a tough call sometimes...

yesterday was quite a good day. although there was this pretty COlumbian who seemed quite responsive and then...suddenly goes cold.

Another little cutie was VERY responsive and we had some great fun only for her to go all quiet when it came to giving out her number...

I got some numbers but not that bothered about seeing them at all. next time i'm only bothering with girls i actually wouldnt mind seeing.
Author:  4nik8r [ Mon May 21, 2012 6:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
I wouldn't say there were any IOIs in that text stream.

I've had plenty of them go cold like that. Always be the Alpha Male, and never let a girl think she "has you" or you are seeking her approval. That is the only way to get past a girl who acts like that.

And just like buying a car — if you are willing to walk away from the deal completely, you are more likely to get what you want in terms of making the deal happen. If they know they "have you" they aren't going to budge on the price. When you walk out the door the salesman will chase your ass down and even sacrifice his commission to make the sale in some cases.

I was gaming a boring girl lately who I had to give the "next" to after a number of attempts at getting her out of her shell. I shit you not, the more I pulled away from her, the more qualifying she became towards me, and the more she would move towards giving up the goods. If I had been supplicating to her or caved in SHE would have decided to give ME the boot instead, because I would just be acting like all the guys she has been with in the past.

It also helps to have a lot lined up.

As for online game, I think it takes longer to find a good quality lay from it, but for a busy guy like myself it is much easier to maintain a regular pattern with it. I don't have time to go night gaming more than once a month if I am lucky right now, and it does help fill in the gaps.

You just have to be EXTREMELY witty, cocky/funny, intelligent without being NERDY, and have a good vocabulary — if you follow some basic rules you will stand out from every other guy that girl's email box has been bombarded by and she will respond 80% of the time.

If you follow a standard "template" approach (depending on which site / crowd) you can cast a wide net and only work the good ones that come back to you.

I find that the girls I've had very good rapport with online tend to be very easy for a FNL when you meet in person, as long as she matches the photo spread in person!
Author:  Picun [ Mon May 21, 2012 6:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
No reply=no interest.
Author:  daffy duck [ Mon May 21, 2012 6:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
No reply=no interest.
I've had some women go cold on me only to resurface a few days or weeks later.

Not that i'm reading too much into that. Could mean they got burnt elsewhere or bored etc...
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon May 21, 2012 6:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
example of a rapport break:
Me: Hey, you are very attractive. Do you have a personality to match?
Her: Erm, no. I'm just a pretty face.
Me: Good, I like em dumb and boring and good looking, tell me something that won't interest me so we can make this quick and I can block you

or

Me: Hey, you are very attractive. Do you have a personality to match?
Her: Erm, no. I'm just a pretty face.
Me: Alright well I'm not into boring girls that can't have fun and just work on being pretty, have a good night and I liked your profile (don't re-intiate just let her come to you, if she doesn't she was just being rude and is not interested)

Good stuff Pump!
Author:  Monsignor Crisanto [ Mon May 21, 2012 6:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Shit test or not interested?
Quote:
Me: Lol. That's exactly what Alessandra Ambrosia said to me when I worked with her on one of the Next ad campaigns. Turns out she wasn't kidding. :-) What kind of field do you do your make-up artistry in?

Me: I'm 5 years older than you! And yes, for your information I am in bed. How long are you going to be?
Those are qualification statements from your end without reciprocal acceptance statements from the girl's end. You just got yourself blown off before you even breached the 4-minute disqualification period.

Courtship research scientist Grammer and company in the seminal research: "Non-verbal behavior as courtship signals: the role of control and choice in selecting partners" shows that telling the girl or implying to her your positive qualities triggers her evolutionary defenses to disqualify you.

In short, when you qualify yourself to her, she disqualifies you back. It's genetic; not memetic.

Your negs to bait her to qualify seems okay. But you qualified yourself instead when she didn't take the bait, hence, the knee-jerk disqualification responses from the girl.

Take pumpington's pointers. If the girl doesn't take your bait, be polite and indifferent about it and sarge other girls. It's pretty obvious from the interaction you posted that you're coming off from a needy frame of mind. :twisted:
Author:  daffy duck [ Mon May 21, 2012 6:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Shit test or not interested?
Quote:
Quote:
Me: Lol. That's exactly what Alessandra Ambrosia said to me when I worked with her on one of the Next ad campaigns. Turns out she wasn't kidding. :-) What kind of field do you do your make-up artistry in?

Me: I'm 5 years older than you! And yes, for your information I am in bed. How long are you going to be?
Those are qualification statements from your end without reciprocal acceptance statements from the girl's end. You just got yourself blown off before you even breached the 4-minute disqualification period.

Courtship research scientist Grammer and company in the seminal research: "Non-verbal behavior as courtship signals: the role of control and choice in selecting partners" shows that telling the girl or implying to her your positive qualities triggers her evolutionary defenses to disqualify you.

In short, when you qualify yourself to her, she disqualifies you back. It's genetic; not memetic.

Your negs to bait her to qualify seems okay. But you qualified yourself instead when she didn't take the bait, hence, the knee-jerk disqualification response from the girl.

Take pumpington's pointers. If the girl doesn't take your bait, be polite and indifferent about it and sarge other girls. It's pretty obvious from the interaction you posted that you're coming off from a needy frame of mind. :twisted:
ok. that's useful information. i didn't realise i was being needy.

how do i eradicate the needy wuss inside me?
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/