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Age difference question
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=136105
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Author:  Raziel01 [ Wed May 16, 2012 9:47 pm ]
Post subject:  Age difference question

Hi all,
Just joined the forums a few days ago and am working my way though material and looking through posts. I plan on getting out this weekend to try approaching etc, so I'll be sure to post to report on how I get on.

In the meantime I am trying POF again to set up some first dates etc. A while ago I was talking to a HB8 who was about 9 years younger than me. She seemed shy and reserved, not giving too much in the way of answers but always answering, and quickly. She did give me her number and text me a lot but she wanted to wait to get to know me better until we set up a first date. Anyway, this was earlier in the year so I got bored and left it.

Today I messaged her again on POF and she was, again, quick to get back and already have her number again (she changed it since), and have only messaged her a few times. Going to try again to set up a first meet - but wanted to know if there is anything to be aware of when meeting a girl a lot younger?

I'm imagining things are pretty much the same except I'll need to make her feel really comfortable?

Any pointers or comments would be great. I'll let you know how I get on and if I get the first date arranged.

Author:  league [ Wed May 16, 2012 9:56 pm ]
Post subject: 

aslong as she's legal i wouldn't worry about it, i'm 24 and my gf is 18, the age difference doesn't bother me in the slightest

Author:  Raziel01 [ Wed May 16, 2012 10:00 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
aslong as she's legal i wouldn't worry about it, i'm 24 and my gf is 18, the age difference doesn't bother me in the slightest
Oh don't get me wrong, the age difference thing doesnt bother me at all, I wouldnt feel weird about it. I was more thinking of how to handle her and the situation. Is it just game as normal or focus a little more on building comfort first as she seems a little reserved and shy.

More how to handle the situation.

Author:  detox75 [ Wed May 16, 2012 10:02 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
I'll need to make her feel really comfortable?

Possible red flag

what do you mean by this exactly? Whats your comfort plan?

Author:  Raziel01 [ Wed May 16, 2012 10:06 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Quote:
I'll need to make her feel really comfortable?

Possible red flag

what do you mean by this exactly? Whats your comfort plan?
I may be gauging it all wrong but my gut feeling is that if she is so shy, then I need to get her to relax when we meet, by doing most of the talking and work, trying to get her engaged. What I'm not sure is do I start the escalating and kino etc as normal? It may well be that I should, which is why I'm asking.

One of the reasons I'm here is I am slow with that shit anyway, so it may just be the AFC in me making an excuse to move slow with her.

Does that make sense?

Author:  detox75 [ Wed May 16, 2012 10:20 pm ]
Post subject: 

Yes and your right, its very AFC to focus on comfort.

Mystery is a great man, but one of the biggest disservices he ever did to the PUA community is push the comfort angle.

Unfortunately his direct descendants, primarily RSD and Love Systems both now inherited this tainted mantle. Fortunately, outside of these groups Im not aware of many other PUA's who even mention comfort or similar bahaviors.

Here is the problem, as a AFC you making a woman feel "comfortable" is just reinforcing the bad habits you already have. You want to make her feel attracted and that has very little to do with comforting. AFCs will equate comfort with supplicating which leads to continued failure. Smiling a lot, laughing at her statements which aren't funny, and building phoney rapport with her will keep you from gaining her attraction. It sounds like that's your plan, and its a fail. Also the fact that you perceive her as shy makes no difference, it may just mean bust her balls a little bit less.

When Mystery talked about comfort originally it was to only FOLLOW attraction, and used to get a lay from 9-10's and to prevent buyers remorse. Comfort is needed much less, en toto, with 6-8's and i'm not sure your game is tight enough to be worrying about buyers remorse because that's a "quality problem"
.

Sorry to go off on you but this "comfort" myth among new guys drives me nuts. Forget comfort until you get very good with woman. Focus on generating attraction.

Dtx

Author:  Raziel01 [ Wed May 16, 2012 10:23 pm ]
Post subject: 

Dont worry about going off on one dude, I'm here to learn!

Thanks for the advice as well, its that kind of thinking I need to shake.

So the plan is to get this meet set up and start to build attraction staight away.

I'm going through the forums now looking for threads that show how best to do this, so will have a plan of action by the time we meet.

Cheers!

Author:  detox75 [ Wed May 16, 2012 10:30 pm ]
Post subject: 

Good work, just keep pumping attraction through your good game, strong framing, and any routines or set pieces you have. This is especially helpful with internet chicks as you already have the hook in with confirmed initial interest. As far as escalating kino, again that's for post - "A2" attraction.

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