I went thru a pretty rough break up with a girl recently. When we were together it was amazing (duh). She gave herself completely...I had complete control and some people referred to her as being in "servitude" whatever that means
....the reality is I did love this girl, not just in feeling but as a human being, I always pushed her forward and supported her. The one thing I sought was for her to grow as a person.Fast forward to the last month. One night after an amazing sex session, as we lay there on the floor we made eye contact. It was different, I felt this rush of energy inside of me and literally felt my heart speed up. At that moment it felt like no matter what it would everything would be okay. It was this moment that I decided I would give her everything, to be the best boyfriend I could be.
Then the guy she lost it to began to hit her up. He would text her "I was nervous today bc you looked so beautiful" or on valentines "do you want to go out for movies and a date" etc. For an entire month I did not let it bother me and I didnt give it much thought even when she was constantly hanging out with him in school. Up until the last to second week did I mention it bothered me. Then one day they got drunk together and the whole story flipped. I let her know that it bothered me, and began to say things like " you dont care anymore" "you dont respect me" and such statements which I tried to use in logic.
eventually I got sick of it and broke up with her. Unfortunately I tried getting back with her, I begged and pleaded for about a month. I bought bears and flowers and letters etc. All of this even when I knew she was indeed sleeping with the guy. I clung to the hope that her random calls and texts of "i miss you mightve meant something". She is now with him officially.
But looking back 3 months into the future I can see all my lessons!
1. I should've frozen her out, instead of using logic.
2. I Should've never given her everything and switched the power.
3. I should've beat the shit out of the guy... but i hoped she'd know better.
4. I should've never begged, I am the prize but I lost sight of it.
5. When I found out she was talking to an ex again I shouldve cut her off.
6. and the most important NEVER GIVE YOUR BALLS AND CONTROL OF YOURSELF TO A GIRL... BE SELFISH!
ah well lesson learned. Good things I have my balls back. I have been sargin like crazy everywhere(:
yesterday at the market I went up to a hb8 and she said "im flattered, i admire your courage.. keep it up" turns out she was 26 and had a bf lol.
today I saw a blonde hb8.5 and went up to her and simply asked to sit and eat on the same table.. needless to say conversation ensued.
and again in chipotle sarged the cashier. She respoded with smiles and questions about my life (: