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Confused and receiving mixed signals..
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=132868
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Author:  jcrane5 [ Sat Apr 07, 2012 1:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Confused and receiving mixed signals..

Hey so this is kind of an update to this thread.

casino-dealer-number-close-follow-up-vt101720.html

I just thought it no longer belonged in the approach and opening thread. So I'm posting here.

So after she told me she was not interested I stopped going to the casino because school started.

Flash forward a few months I get a random text from her. She invites me out to dinner at the casino and we stay until 5am which is closing time.

Oh during that time we spent together she was getting comfortable and sometimes leaning against me and etc. We even talked about a snowboarding trip for the following weekend and she seemed really interested.

So we're walking away and I'm thinking to myself I want to kiss her. I'm just gonna go for it. So I gently grab her arm and give her a small pull and she turns towards me and I'm going in, except there's a small problem. She was a little awkwardly positioned and I was thinking to myself I should pull back. Except I'm already leaned in and I'm committed. So I keep leaning and... end up giving her the most awkward kiss in the history of kisses on her cheek.

I pull back and I go "So... that was awkward..." And she goes "Yup.."

Then to move it past that as fast as possible I go "Text me when you get home so I know you get home safely" and she goes "Okay."

During my car ride home I'm obviously beating myself up over that awkward kiss. And I get home and she sends me a text "Got home safely. Thanks!" And to this I'm thinking 'Oh wow, she actually sent me a text. Cool. Maybe the kiss wasn't so bad.' Except when I bring up the snowboard trip we had planned, she makes up that she is busy with studying and grad school applications and etc. and then says she's seeing someone. So I just was like 'Whelp.. I guess we move on to the next girl now.'

I go on the snowboarding trip with my friends and plan another one for the following week when randomly I get a text from her that she can snowboard on days when she's not working. So now I'm confused because she's seeing someone but she also wants to go snowboarding with me. So I'm thinking, maybe she just lied about seeing someone. Except I was talking to another casino dealer friend who I told all of this to and she talked to her and confirmed that she was seeing someone. So I think it's pretty much over now.

Flash forward to a few days ago. She calls me up. (I am now realizing how long this is) She asks about when I'm going snowboarding and I tell her I'm planning another one for this week and she says she wants to go. So I'm like "Okay cool." In the following days leading up I have texted her and each time she responded with more confirmation that she's coming with me.

Flash forward to now. Me and my friends are all about to go snowboarding in a few hours including her. I think she's seeing someone but she's still coming with me. My thinking is that maybe she's interested in me and maybe she is looking to break up with the other guy. Or maybe she's lying about seeing someone. I don't know. But I really like this one. She's the first girl I ever got a number from. And in my mind the stories of how I got her number and the story of how I awkwardly kissed her would make great stories to tell others. That's the hopeless romantic wishy side of me.

Anyways, opinions? Thoughts?

Author:  DeducibleLyric [ Sat Apr 07, 2012 2:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Confused and receiving mixed signals..

Great job on the number close and getting this far.

As for your thread, you are over analysing and thinking way too much about the outcome, that in essence, you are shooting yourself in the foot. There is a lot of assumptions where you state "maybe she" or "perhaps this". It is a battle against yourself where you rationalize what has already happened. Don't. It will only hinder your chances with her in the sense you will be concentrating so much on the desired outcome you won't actually 'be there' in the moment. In short, you won't be congruent with who you. Judging by how much you want this to work, you are certainly way too much invested in this girl that it will definitely hinder your chances with her. You have already put this girl on a pedestal so naturally you assume you need to do something 'special' with her.

I bet the awkwardness of the kiss would of been dramatically reduced if you hadn't paid that much attention to it. The fact you spoke out "this is awkward" only amplified the so called 'problem'. If you had dismissed it and didn't pay it any attention, the girl wouldn't have either. What would make it even more awkward is if this was the first physical contact you made. Her leaning on you doesn't count. I'm talking about Kino.

Have a look at DiCarlo's Escalation Ladder. It will give you a better insight. I've PM'd you the link as I need 5 posts to post the link. This may seem 'awkward' at first or make you feel a bit creepy however with continuous practice and time it will be second nature to you. With physical escalation you will be able to connect with women on a whole different level. Remember one step at a time.

The fact that she reengages conversation with you via texting/a call is a positive sign that she was at least thinking about you. That being said she might just be stringing you along for validation/backup or she might just want to snowboard. You don't know what but you certainly can make it easier for her to sway in the direction you want. I would suggest talking/gaming other women in the mean while. It will give you a fresh perspective and also help you realise that losing this one girl is not the end of the world.

It's when you start over thinking everything and trying to make things work that you end up doing the complete opposite. Ever tried so hard to get something only to fail and ponder where you went wrong? Then some days you can automatically get the same thing with little or no effort? It's a shift in mentality, being there in the moment. Actually connecting with the girl you're talking to.

~ Lyric

Author:  eckmansdisciple [ Sat Apr 07, 2012 2:48 pm ]
Post subject: 

I'm not going to beat you up about the kiss execution because you seem to be doing a fine enough job of kicking your own ass for it. It seems to me like she's opening the door back up for you, don't waste this one.

Either that or you're about to get friend-zoned so hard....

Author:  jcrane5 [ Sat Apr 07, 2012 3:24 pm ]
Post subject: 

@DeducibleLyric Thanks for the link, I got it.

@eckmansdisciple Lol yah I think I'm about to get friend zoned super hard

Author:  P-Style [ Sat Apr 07, 2012 3:27 pm ]
Post subject: 

Pull the trigger again. Make the ho say no principle.
The worst position to be in is an unclear one.

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