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This rub me the wrong way.
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=132544		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Datguy [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 8:19 am ]
Post subject:  This rub me the wrong way.
I went to a bar with a guy i know and his friends, we got to the point where we were a bit drunk. Later the gf of a guy that was there joined us, she had some drinks but was mostly sober. Not a particulary attractive girl, she's a 6 at most, too skinny for my taste, and with nothing interesting to say. She also sort of had a rather bitchy attitude, but anyway, she works with another girl in a bar, a girl that i find quite attractive, but wasn't with us at all. I asked the bitchy girl about her co-worker, and she told me she has two kids and a bf, so i was like "well, no thanks, sucks cuz she is really pretty".

Later i was talking with the guy that invited me to the bar about a female friend he has, and that he was suggesting as somebody to introduce to me. I was asking him some general questions about this girl, and at some point the girl that works in the bar says "woah, you really are desperate aren't you?" which sounded just out of the blue for me. I was a bit drunk but not by much, and i was just asking general questions about that other girl my friend wanted for us to meet. I brushed the remark off, find it even amusing, and went on with the conversation with my friend like nothing. I think i told the girl something to the effect of "we guys know what we want from a woman, and we can get rather stupid about it". Looking back, i felt i was being quite cool for most of the night, maybe i came out a bit needy that night with some of my remarks, or was this girl just acting like a bitch? Also, prior to all that exchange i think i said at one point "Shit, i'm good looking, i know it. I don't settle with average girls."
Author:  GeorgePH [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 8:43 am ]
Post subject:  Re: This rub me the wrong way.
Quote:
I went to a bar with a guy i know and his friends, we got to the point where we were a bit drunk. Later the gf of a guy that was there joined us, she had some drinks but was mostly sober. Not a particulary attractive girl, she's a 6 at most, too skinny for my taste, and with nothing interesting to say. She also sort of had a rather bitchy attitude, but anyway, she works with another girl in a bar, a girl that i find quite attractive, but wasn't with us at all. I asked the bitchy girl about her co-worker, and she told me she has two kids and a bf, so i was like "well, no thanks, sucks cuz she is really pretty".

Later i was talking with the guy that invited me to the bar about a female friend he has, and that he was suggesting as somebody to introduce to me. I was asking him some general questions about this girl, and at some point the girl that works in the bar says "woah, you really are desperate aren't you?" which sounded just out of the blue for me. I was a bit drunk but not by much, and i was just asking general questions about that other girl my friend wanted for us to meet. I brushed the remark off, find it even amusing, and went on with the conversation with my friend like nothing. I think i told the girl something to the effect of "we guys know what we want from a woman, and we can get rather stupid about it". Looking back, i felt i was being quite cool for most of the night, maybe i came out a bit needy that night with some of my remarks, or was this girl just acting like a bitch?
Why wouldn't you date a woman with two kids? She's really pretty and maybe she's an amazing human being. What's the issue?

Why does it matter that your boy's gf is too skinny for your taste or a 6? Why did you include that in the story? Does it make you feel better about yourself to talk down on other people?

Why are you thinking about this so much? It DOES bother you that this girl (who you rationalize not wanting) might think you're desperate, doesn't it? Why do you think that is?

Most importantly WHY DOES IT MATTER if you're desperate or cool?


Answer all these questions IN DETAIL and you'll understand much more than any reply in this thread can give you.
Author:  thedocta [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 8:50 am ]
Post subject:  Re: This rub me the wrong way.
Quote:
"woah, you really are desperate aren't you?" which sounded just out of the blue for me. I was a bit drunk but not by much, and i was just asking general questions about that other girl my friend wanted for us to meet. I brushed the remark off, find it even amusing, and went on with the conversation with my friend like nothing. I think i told the girl something to the effect of "we guys know what we want from a woman, and we can get rather stupid about it". Looking back, i felt i was being quite cool for most of the night, maybe i came out a bit needy that night with some of my remarks, or was this girl just acting like a bitch?
it makes no difference if she was a bitch or not, the signals she picked up from you caused her to think you were desperate...which means you weren't giving off the right signals.
Quote:
Also, prior to all that exchange i think i said at one point "Shit, i'm good looking, i know it. I don't settle with average girls."
no offense implied, but that sounds like something a washed up, drunk and desperate has-been would say who is grasping for validation. it doesn't make you sound cool and confident. people who are attractive don't have to tell other people they are attractive -- their body language and smoothness says it. people who say it with words become unattractive instantly. It's like a director who uses voice over to convey the complex emotions in a scene that he doesn't know how to portray -- its fake.
Author:  RedCali [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 8:54 am ]
Post subject: 
I think what the OP is getting at is how to maintain that natural, dominant mind-set. I mean the girl did sort of shit-test him with that comment. However since I wasn't there I don't know the context and if it was a mix of her joking/your intoxication or if she was really being a bitch.

I was in a similar situation when I first got into pua, a 2 set with a 9 and her bitchy friend. We were in a circle with a couple of my guy/girl friends and I was doing some light kino on the 9, the friend who was annoying me all night blurts "you really like touching her dont you?" So i blocked her out of the circle by stepping in front of her so my back is to her as I start kino on the 9 some more. The way my friends were standing it completely shut her out of the group lol. Of course she cockblocked the shit out of me at the end of the night.

It's best to befriend the ugly girls though, try to keep your cool (sounds like you did). But know that some UGs are just hateful, sex deprived bitches that will try and wreck you anyways.

But I do think you pushed it too far asking about this other girl. Would have been best if you could get her to join your group.
Author:  Datguy [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 9:28 am ]
Post subject: 
No offense with any of the answers, you guys gave me some things to think about. My attitude, and my way of processing the overall situation, needs to change. I behaved in a childish way that night, and i need to put other things into consideration. So thanks for the replies.
Author:  GeorgePH [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 9:34 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
No offense with any of the answers, you guys gave me some things to think about. My attitude, and my way of processing the overall situation, needs to change. I behaved in a childish way that night, and i need to put other things into consideration. So thanks for the replies.
It takes big balls to man up and say you were wrong and need to change. I think you have made the first step in the best possible direction - not just for PUA but for life in general. I'd love to keep up with what you do next. If you want, stay in touch via private message here or the contact form on my site (link in signature).

Best of luck and congratulations :)
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