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| I am losing hope. I really need your help. https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=132114 |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 9:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | I am losing hope. I really need your help. |
I had been having no luck in my life. I am in college, don't have a social life, no gfs. I have friends. I talk to them in class, I have their numbers, but they are all busy students, and don't have time to hang out. My desire to get a girlfriend, just like everyone else, is getting stronger every day, as I see girls in college. I don't have problems talking to girls. Its just that I haven't been very social in my early college years, when I was a freshman. I am a sophomore now, and I am trying to talk to girls in class. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. I am reading How to start a small talk by Debra Fine to talk to anyone, and socialize with girls. But, for some reason, I just don't happen to get myself a social life. I am willing to do anything in my life to get a girlfriend, and I meant ANYTHING. Sometimes, I feel like my life just stopped here and isn't going anywhere else. What should I do? I really want a gf, and I know I sound very desperate, but, right now, I really can't think of anything else. I would appreciate your suggestions and advice. |
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| Author: | doclift [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 9:41 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Develop a plan. If you don't have a plan then borrow someone else's. Drop $8 and pick up a used copy of The Mystery Method. Read through it and then try it out. There is so much going on at any given college campus that there is straight-up no excuse for not having a lively social circle. Join clubs, go to meetings, open mic nights, movie showings, or just hangout in the food court. I landed a date with a girl once just by passing notes back and forth with her in the library. Get out there, take a chance, and be social. |
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| Author: | izumi [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 9:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
My advice is to work on yourself first,i`m no expert,but i can relate to you, cause i`ve been through ALL of your problems,i`m workig a lot to understand myself better. Be patient,put effort,and follow some good advice written by good people(you will recognize them) and AVOID at all cost all the other bullshits. Good luck |
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| Author: | Hejsan [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Okay, first medicine against your self pityness: I would estimate that round 40% of all guys are in a similar situation. Therefore: Go out and socialize. Even with those nerds. On a normal houseparty I get now to know almost everyone. I can now entertain them and have fun. Some time ago people asked me whats wrong with you? I also realized that people can be like flies. When you have a funny entertaining conversation random people bust up nearby you and want to join my conversation. When you are in the core of amusement you just talk to some girls, casualy like some other dude and use some of those techniques in the forum. I can recommend to you : The social blueprint from RSD |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: follow some good advice written by good people(you will recognize them) and AVOID at all cost all the other bullshits.
What do you exactly mean? Any examples? Besides, I am working on myself. Be a little more specific.
Good luck |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Go out and socialize.
you are telling me this, as if i don't know anything about socalization. i call people and they don't pick up. so i don't get any calls to go to parties. if they don't pick up, then what to do?
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| Author: | Bond-007 [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Whenever in a park or a place you are calm; ask the next stranger for the time. I don`t care if it`s an old man that comes your way, or the hottest chick in the campus, you ask what time is it. That it`s a simple excercise that puts you in the right mood. Once you are done with asking go and try to initiate a conversation, with whoever you feel like it. But do this things in the placed order. |
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| Author: | AmazingArt [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Reading things wont help much. I know people that read so many books but are still no where near being good. The best way to change yourself is to 1) Realize your self-worth. Understand who you really are who you want to be. And improve your confidence and self-esteem. 2) Go out there and DO IT. Nothing really nothing will help you other than experience. So go out and just enjoy. Talk to girls. Talk to guys. Don't be afraid to express yourself. If you get rejected not a big deal just move on. To make things easier try to get a friend who has similar situation as you and get really close and push and encourage each other. Good luck! |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I landed a date with a girl once just by passing notes back and forth with her in the library. Get out there, take a chance, and be social.
How did you get a date just by passing notes? Can you give me any details? My life is pathetic and I am saying this because I am trying very hard to improve and change things around in my life, but they aren't going anywhere. Can you tell me scenario how you got a date with her, using a little details? |
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| Author: | DJ_Z [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 10:58 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
You need therapy. You are depressed, and a girlfriend will not solve those issues. The kind of attitude you have on life breeds insecurity and anger. Okay, you think a girlfriend will change your life for the better? What happens when she hangs with a guy friend? What happens when she doesn't wnat to see you on a weekend? You realize that your happiness revolves entirely around her, and she's not reciprocating that level of emotion, well how dare she?! I've been down that road, dude, and it's not a good one for anybody involved. Get real psychiatric help |
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| Author: | RetiredRodeo [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 11:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: You need therapy. You are depressed, and a girlfriend will not solve those issues. The kind of attitude you have on life breeds insecurity and anger. Okay, you think a girlfriend will change your life for the better? What happens when she hangs with a guy friend? What happens when she doesn't wnat to see you on a weekend? You realize that your happiness revolves entirely around her, and she's not reciprocating that level of emotion, well how dare she?!
^^^^^^
I've been down that road, dude, and it's not a good one for anybody involved. Get real psychiatric help |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 11:24 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: You need therapy. You are depressed, and a girlfriend will not solve those issues. The kind of attitude you have on life breeds insecurity and anger. Okay, you think a girlfriend will change your life for the better? What happens when she hangs with a guy friend? What happens when she doesn't wnat to see you on a weekend? You realize that your happiness revolves entirely around her, and she's not reciprocating that level of emotion, well how dare she?!
You are nothing but a fucking retard. Re-read my post. I am saying this because, I know you haven't read it, or did read it but didn't understand it. I am not depressed and I don't need a girlfriend to change the way I feel. I am good for myself. But, every now and then, when others are getting some action and I am not, and when I see a girl that I like, and I am not with her, is my problem. I don't need any shrink, because I am good for myself. I needed help with building a social life, so if you don't have anything to offer from your little life, then shouldn't have answered my qs in the first place.
I've been down that road, dude, and it's not a good one for anybody involved. Get real psychiatric help |
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| Author: | DJ_Z [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 11:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I am losing hope. I really need your help. |
Quote: I had been having no luck in my life. I am in college, don't have a social life, no gfs. I have friends. I talk to them in class, I have their numbers, but they are all busy students, and don't have time to hang out.
Yep
My desire to get a girlfriend, just like everyone else, is getting stronger every day, as I see girls in college. I don't have problems talking to girls. Its just that I haven't been very social in my early college years, when I was a freshman. I am a sophomore now, and I am trying to talk to girls in class. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. I am reading How to start a small talk by Debra Fine to talk to anyone, and socialize with girls. But, for some reason, I just don't happen to get myself a social life. I am willing to do anything in my life to get a girlfriend, and I meant ANYTHING. Sometimes, I feel like my life just stopped here and isn't going anywhere else. What should I do? I really want a gf, and I know I sound very desperate, but, right now, I really can't think of anything else. I would appreciate your suggestions and advice. |
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| Author: | Monsignor Crisanto [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 11:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
When you alienate the very people who are trying to help you, those who freely give you their time, efforts, expertise and experience, you will never get a social life. If the way you behave online reflects the way you behave in real life, then most of us here cannot help you. |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 11:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: You need therapy. You are depressed, and a girlfriend will not solve those issues. The kind of attitude you have on life breeds insecurity and anger. Okay, you think a girlfriend will change your life for the better? What happens when she hangs with a guy friend? What happens when she doesn't wnat to see you on a weekend? You realize that your happiness revolves entirely around her, and she's not reciprocating that level of emotion, well how dare she?!
so you are saying that a shrink can fix my problem. good lord why are you here then? a shrink should be able to get u a gf or to pick up chicks. if u can't help dont try to help.
I've been down that road, dude, and it's not a good one for anybody involved. Get real psychiatric help |
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