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| How to develop a social circle from being a loner? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=131740 |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 1:02 am ] |
| Post subject: | How to develop a social circle from being a loner? |
Currently I have no social life in college. I am reading books on making small talks, and How to Win Friends, by D. Carnegie. When I meet people, I have a good first impression, but when I get thier number and call them, they don't pick up. What could be going on here? I know college students are struggling with classes, but why they wouldn't pick up their phones? I left voicemail, but never got any calls back. I was calling to ask them if they wanted tohang out or play some sports for fun. I was calling mostly guys, with whom I am trying to establish a friedship with. How can I build a social circle all the way from the bottom? |
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| Author: | Mr. Assertive [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:02 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
do you keep talking to them in class? Outside of class? Can't use the phone for everything. You should invite them out during class. This creates the friendships. A girl gave me her number just because I offered help a few times. I didn't ask for it, but I invited her to study any time. Not being needy, just being friendly. She took down my digits like that. Same thing with dudes. Just don't let them walk all over you if you do study groups, lol |
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| Author: | mapleleaf [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:31 am ] |
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Quote: do you keep talking to them in class? Outside of class? Can't use the phone for everything. You should invite them out during class. This creates the friendships. A girl gave me her number just because I offered help a few times. I didn't ask for it, but I invited her to study any time. Not being needy, just being friendly. She took down my digits like that. Same thing with dudes. Just don't let them walk all over you if you do study groups, lol
yah, i would like to talk to them during class, but most of them don't come to class, those who do, i talk to them. others i only see once a week. although its the middle of the semester, i am trying my best to meet new ppl in class and start a conversation. any more ideas, to get guys numbers, so that i can hang out with them? for girls, i would wait, until i establish a solid freindship. any more ideas?
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| Author: | 0uch [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 6:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I make guy friends all the time at a bar. Of course I don't want any more guy friends so I don't call them. But what do most guys want? Women! Just invite them to go to a bar and talk to some women. Until you get this down, go out by yourself and game. I have done it for almost 6 to 7 months. if starting a social circle, you have to lead the group also. Unless you join another social circle. |
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| Author: | MadTown Mayhem [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 11:54 pm ] |
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My advice would be to try and leave the phone out of the picture. Since you make a good first impression, use it to your advantage....make plans right there & then. Also, frame it as a mutual adventure or experience, not just "them" going out with "you." For example, if you're chatting with someone you met in class, say something like "The test next Thursday is supposed to be a whopper. Let's meet at the library tonight and work out a strategy to prepare for it, then we can knock off around 10 and get a drink at _____." Note the way the question is framed. It's not "do you want to...." it's "let's go to ____." The person you're talking to still gets to say yes or no, but it doesn't place all of the social value on their decision. Also, even if they legitimately can't make it that night, you're in a better position for next time because this way makes you look more like a man on the move, a guy with a plan. Finally, by shaping it as an adventure or experience, you're giving them an extra reason to say yes. Do people always want to study? No. But study and then hit a bar to sarge some women? Hell yes. The great thing about a college campus is that there is almost always something to do or see, and every day brings opportunities to meet people in the same age group as you, with more or less the same responsibilities, interests, and schedule. Keep up on the campus & local events and always have something in your back pocket to offer as a post-introduction adventure. |
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