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What Happened? HELP
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=129327		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  startinglife [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 11:37 am ]
Post subject:  What Happened? HELP
Last week I made a post asking for advice on this chick I was going to meet through a friend and to update, it didn't go well because I got drunk and barely even talked to her. However, I didn't care because I got something better. My roommate's friend from back home came to visit and I have always had a thing for this girl. Beautiful with the perfect personality type for me.

We went out to the bars (next night), got a bit drunk, and I ended up making out with her on the dance floor. I could tell she regretted making out in public because she was all like "omg...I need a cig..blah blah." We went back to my place and my roommate was sleeping, so we just sat in the living room and talked for hours to sober up. We talked about past relationships and a bunch of personal stuff, but we also talked about what happened at the bar and she was all like omg.. can we just like bury this and keep it between us? She didn't want my roommate to find out because he's her childhood friend and thought it would be weird. I was upset, but I didn't really say it or show it..I just said I knew exactly what I was doing even though I had a few drinks. So now it's like 5 in the morning and we were pretty much all sobered up...she told me she was tired and told me to go to my room and get some sleep.

I walked in my room about to close the door shut and bam she's right behind me and stops the door. She starts making out with me and pushes me onto my bed. It gets heated, her bras off, but she said the pants gotta stay on because she's on her period...so after making out for awhile she says she has blue balls (lol) and needs to calm herself down. So I let her sleep in my room and I slept in my other roommate's room because she didn't want her childhood friend to see us waking up together.

So we both get up around noon and it was a bit weird... Our friends from last night came over and watched TV and talked. She and I were a bit distant towards each other..I mean we talked and stuff, but pretty much both of us acted like nothing happened. Few hours later she gets ready to take off (back home) and I helped carry her stuff out to her car. The goodbye was awkward as shit...I didn't kiss nor even hug her because my roommate was next to me and it was kinda weird all morning.

So she leaves and we didn't call each other that day...I texted her the next day being playful/funny asking her how it is to be back home, etc. She says she loves being back and I was all like well don't get too comfortable and visit again. She said that place is a little too crazy for me. And I teased her by saying yeah ripping off studs and biting my face ain't hardcore enough. Then she said yes, and due to those factors I will be returning to my good normal humble life back here...and all I said back was haha fair enough, understood.

I'm no expert, but subtext is obvious... she was cold. How did I fuck this up and what should I have done? I'm contemplating on calling her to talk about everything that happened and stuff, but I thought I would post here for advice before doing something I can't take back... I know the PUA way is to move on and not to get caught up with 1 girl, but her personality is so rare and I genuinely like her. Sorry for the long post, but I'm dying for some good advice from the more experienced...thanks
Author:  Aegis88 [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 12:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sorry to hear this, it's terribly unfortunate that these things happen even if you think you played everything right.
What you need to understand is that alot of girls get caught up in the moment
but unlike us, have this annoying habit of calculating and analyzing every little
bit of the make out/one night stand in terms of :
- Consequences
- What would people think
- What opinion does the guy have on me

and other stuff that in this case dont really matter cause all you did was go for a girl you're actually fond of.

But read your story again and realize that she had something holding her back even the same night you made out, but eventually couldnt resist you.
She woke up, probably feeling weak/cheap even though she had no reason to feel that way and wants to carry on.

Point is, sometimes you just need to accept that it takes 2 for a relationship to work and no matter if you think you can give her everything she needs and even more, She just doesnt feel the same.

What should you have done? i think you didnt do anything wrong, and unless you have the ability of mind control there's not much you can do at this point.

Let her cool off and try talking to her in the next few days, maybe she'll come around...maybe not ;)
But girls with good personality and looks arent rare and never get fixated on that thought. its a killer
Author:  startinglife [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 2:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
Never thought about her feeling "cheap." Should I call and tell her how I feel or would this just destroy my chances in the future? I want to tell her that I genuinely like her and that i wasn't using her for a hook up or anything. I know you shouldn't tell girls you like them and want a relationship, but how about in this case where we already hooked up...IDK I need more advice!
Author:  pumpington [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 2:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
dont worry about it man, she was drinking that night, so she can use that as probable deniability to escalate on you, chances are if you asked her why she was like this, her side would be something like, I was so drunk I don't even remember what happened etc., just assume she still likes you, but is putting on an act to save face

if you want to see her, don't call this out as a problem, just hit her up and hang out
Author:  startinglife [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 3:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
After we made out at the bar, we talked for hours and when we started hooking up I was like...drunk again? She answered nope, I wanna feel it sober this time and we hooked up so I don't think it's a drunk issue... So you think it's a bad idea to call her and talk about what that night meant anyway? I just want to know if it was a mistake she regrets in which case I can start to move on or if she has feelings, but is afraid I won't feel the same way?... or maybe I should finally consider the third possibility that she was horny and got caught up in the moment and hooked up with me cuz I'm cute, but not really interested enough to date...just never thought I would be used for a hook up. Thanks btw, this is all helping me...I'm just looking for guidance so I can make A move down some path...it's the unknown and indecisiveness that's killing me. I guess there is no way to know for sure, so I'll just trust the opinions of the more experienced to decide if I should call or just move on....
Author:  pumpington [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 4:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
nah man, she was drinking that night, it is enough for her to justify her actions after the fact, if someone finds out cause you have a loose mouth, she can back up her actions saying, OHH WELL I WAS TOO DRUNK TO REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED, but it is bullshit, she could have 1 beer and say that, it is just an excuse, not necessarily even one she will give you, but chances are she will not want to take responsibility for what happened, the second day, she was just saving face (my guess), pretending like it never happened, if you like this girl, I suggest you just go try to hang out with her, don't act like your all in love or anything, just be normal, like you were when you were hanging out with her, she is either down, or she isn't down, no need to call her out on anything that doesn't matter, or over think things, the past is the past, and she probably just didn't want to make a big deal of it, just stay present
Author:  EddieFews [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 5:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Dude get over it, it sounds like she lives far away from you.. You hooked up with the girl and she went back home. Its done..

Shoulda just banged her on her period, she would of did it..
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