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Realised I have: "The Accusation Problem!"
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Author:  Zelda [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 12:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Realised I have: "The Accusation Problem!"
I have realised that girls like to accuse me of things, that are not true at all. They are not big or harsh accusations, just silly ones they like to repeat. For example the girl I have started dating accused me of going home every week (I am at uni), I understand she is worried that if I go home every week, we might not spend as much time together (as I am away), so this is definitely an IOI. BUT, how do I handle this?

Other accusations I have received with other girls are:
"you fancy that girl don't you" (when I was in bed with a girl)
"you go to bed really early don't you" (when I didnt reply to a girl's text at night)
"you never go to your lessons"

these accusations fascinate me because:
1. they are not true
2. they act SO CERTAIN when they accuse me
3. they repeat these things on and on like it's fact
4. They are an IOI
5. I get the impression they are trying to get me to deny these things?
6. I get the impression they are trying to put me down slightly? (shit test?)
7. They may say these things to make themselves feel better?

So help me, how do I deal with them!
Do I agree with her? Do I disagree? or do I simply not answer her question? (leave her hanging and frustrate her to show I am not manipulated)
Any NLP tricks I could use? Or am I doing something else wrong?
Thanks for reading!
Author:  Snarg [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 4:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
It's an indirect way of asking a question. The other day, someone was spamming the fuck out of my phone with texts and the girl I was with kept making comments like "Wow, someone's popular" and "I wonder who's texting you so much!". They're clearly IOIs, so I don't see why you'd consider this a "problem".

The nice thing about that, however, is that you can tease her even more by not giving her the information she's looking for. Next time she says "You go to bed early, don't you?", just smile or laugh a little.
Author:  Zelda [ Mon Feb 13, 2012 6:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
thanks! yeah you're right, it's not a problem, just bugs me a bit haha. now that I think of it, even the "you go to bed early don't you" has hidden motives which I now realise... sometimes I won't answer her texts late at night and she's saying this to really inquire "why don't you answer my texts" (but she doesn't want to seem desperate). so a good reply would be, "i always stay up late." ;)
Author:  Snarg [ Tue Feb 14, 2012 3:35 am ]
Post subject: 
Exactly, perfect. Keep going with that thought process and you'll do well.
Author:  LordCthulu [ Tue Feb 14, 2012 7:02 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
It's an indirect way of asking a question. The other day, someone was spamming the fuck out of my phone with texts and the girl I was with kept making comments like "Wow, someone's popular" and "I wonder who's texting you so much!". They're clearly IOIs, so I don't see why you'd consider this a "problem".

The nice thing about that, however, is that you can tease her even more by not giving her the information she's looking for. Next time she says "You go to bed early, don't you?", just smile or laugh a little.
Is that really an IOI? I have a friend [who I accidentally got in the friend zone with] that says this to me all the time. I never considered it as an IOI.
Author:  Snarg [ Tue Feb 14, 2012 1:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
I was just trying to give another example so don't read too much into it. I guess for that particular line you'd have to pay attention to her body language as well, or at the very least be intuitive enough to understand if she's trying to get you to tell her who's texting you or if she's just trying to be funny.
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